I had meeting with my doc today. I told her everything.

[DivineSpark]

Good things, bad things. I also said about SASU. How much it has helped me.

 

[bankai]

What did she say?

 

[DivineSpark]

What did she say?

She was wondering if being on sasu is really healthy for my mind. I told her it is only place where I can talk about suicide without stigma. She was pretty understanding.

 

[bankai]

I expected that to be her response.Everyone thinks it's bad.at least she was OK with it at the end.

 

[darksouls]

Good things, bad things. I also said about SASU. How much it has helped me.

did your doctor know that sasu existed before you told her?

 

[DivineSpark]

did your doctor know that sasu existed before you told her?

No. I also told her I am surprised I didnt find this forum earlier (been suicidal for many years)

 

[bankai]

The thing is, people assume that being on the site will make you worse or even more suicidal. But it's the opposite. You can speak to people and learn to cope.

 

[DivineSpark]

The thing is, people assume that being on the site will make you worse or even more suicidal. But it's the opposite. You can speak to people and learn to cope.

I agree. It has been great place, also I dont feel like I am alone in this struggle. Which helps me as well.

 

[Apathy79]

It's great to find a therapist you can be honest with without being committed. Seems rare these days. Hope it works out for you - I imagine it will be helpful.

 

[bankai]

I agree. It has been great place, also I dont feel like I am alone in this struggle. Which helps me as well.

Dude, you're actually very similar to me. I mean, if you're talking about anhedonia. Welcome to my world. I've lost all capacity for joy at this point. I don't see therapists though. I don't trust anyone enough to do that. I'm just going through the motions of every day. But of course, it'll end one day. So I have that at least to look forward to.

 

[DivineSpark]

Dude, you're actually very similar to me. I mean, if you're talking about anhedonia. Welcome to my world. I've lost all capacity for joy at this point. I don't see therapists though. I don't trust anyone enough to do that. I'm just going through the motions of every day. But of course, it'll end one day. So I have that at least to look forward to.

I miss days when I was able to enjoy wide variety of video games when I was teen. Nowadays I dont get same feeling anymore. I mean, I want to play but thanks to anhedonia there is no joy or pleasure in that.

 

[bankai]

I miss days when I was able to enjoy wide variety of video games when I was teen. Nowadays I dont get same feeling anymore. I mean, I want to play but thanks to anhedonia there is no joy or pleasure in that.

I spent 3000 plus hours on Overwatch few years ago lol. And this was only one game among many others. I actually paid for a two year PSN subscription in 2021.Then I suddenly realized I couldn't game anymore because I was neglecting pretty much everything else in my life. It's been years since I stopped gaming. My PS4 has just been collecting dust


To be honest though, I don't think I'm too regretful. Tons of 12 year olds were calling me names and stuff

 

[DivineSpark]

I spent 3000 plus hours on Overwatch few years ago lol. And this was only one game among many others. I actually paid for a two year PSN subscription in 2021.Then I suddenly realized I couldn't game anymore because I was neglecting pretty much everything else in my life. It's been years since I stopped gaming. My PS4 has just been collecting dust


To be honest though, I don't think I'm too regretful. Tons of 12 year olds were calling me names and stuff

My most played game on steam is civilization 5 (about 1700 hours) (for last 6 years)

 

[roommate]

Great job Divine, I'm so happy for you!
I will open about it aswell in the future since, I'm also not suicidal anymore so that makes it a bit easier.

 

[GeminiButter]

Well done for being honest with her, I know that is difficult and for me is usually quite scary. I'm glad it went well and that she seemed to be understanding.

 

[QuinineGuy]

My therapist said I should buy and listen to more records (its a hobby) and not think about death (I have advanced colon cancer). Therapists are great...until the songs on your records remind you that you're dying.

 

[DivineSpark]

My therapist said I should buy and listen to more records (its a hobby) and not think about death (I have advanced colon cancer). Therapists are great...until the songs on your records remind you that you're dying.

Oh shit! That must be tough! What are chances of survival at your point? Do you get treated?

 

[QuinineGuy]

Oh shit! That must be tough! What are chances of survival at your point? Do you get treated?

I finished my first round of chemo about 3 months ago. I start my next round in a couple more months. They are trying to kill the thing killing me. Once this next round is done, the plan is surgery.

The kicker in all this is that chemo sucks. I hate it. And get my bowels cut apart can lead to other problems down the road...which are not pleasant (imagine not being able to control your guts...you know... when you need to void them for example...) and your partner has to help with all that...

So...treatment...yes... what hangs in the balance is life quality...

 

[LostLily]

She was wondering if being on sasu is really healthy for my mind. I told her it is only place where I can talk about suicide without stigma. She was pretty understanding.

Wish the hospital psychiatrist and psychologist were more understanding. I had a fight with them about where I should be on this site, even though I told them the same thing.