I finally am getting the supplies that will lead to eternal peace

[Somerando]

I managed to find an affordable muzzle loader with the right caliber, and fortunately, I have an option to ship it to the store (with no shipping costs!) This means no one in my family will know about it. I will just have to sneak it in the house sometime. The next thing I need are the bullets. I'm having a really hard time finding bullets that I can just go ahead and buy in the store. Everything seems to want to ship out to me which is really annoying, considering if I get it shipped to my house, people might notice I have bullets and my plan might not happen. I'm relieved. I know what angle to use and everything. It's nice to know that I'll be able to have eternal peace in the near future... Just a little over a week. Hopefully I'll be able to find some bullets, though.

The thing I like about the gun is all I have to do is pull the trigger, and I'm dead. I did think about hanging but I'm worried that I would be found in time. I would have to plan it around when I could go at least 30 minutes without interruption. By shooting myself, I don't need to worry about that. I even know where to point the gun and what angle to use and everything.

I've attempted suicide before and I just want to succeed this time. There becomes a point when life just is not worth it anymore. There's no hope things will get better. There's a point when one is beyond help, and I'm at that point.

 

[i187914]

You know about recoil and hesitation wounds? And other problems.

 

[Justanotherconsumer]

Ive only shot a muzzleloader a couple of times and were preloaded, cap and ball, these old type guns often have a "hair" trigger which means you barely even need to touch the trigger before it goes off.

 

[Somerando]

Ive only shot a muzzleloader a couple of times and were preloaded, cap and ball, these old type guns often have a "hair" trigger which means you barely even need to touch the trigger before it goes off.

Thank you for the warning. I will make sure it's in the correct position and everything before I even touch the trigger.

 

[Somerando]

You know about recoil and hesitation wounds? And other problems.

I don't know what else I would use. I can't get any shotguns, rifles, or pistols because I've been in the mental hospital. I worry with something like hanging, all though quick, I would be found in time and saved. I live in a big family, it's a very real possibility.