Venting I feel so alone

[meowmeow<3]

I am completely and utterly isolated. The only person I have is my abusive boyfriend. He's abused me in every textbook way, but I've never known anything different. I grew up being abused and i'll die like this too. It's not like I'm going to find anything better though, I have a slurry of mental illness and I'm fat and unattractive. No one will ever fucking want me. Everyone at school (I'm 18, I'm a senior) hates me because of some stupid rumors. I have 9 fucking credits, I'm probably not going to graduate. People glare at me whenever I go and talk shit because of my ex. I want friends so bad but I'm too annoying.

 

[notwavinbutdrowning]

Your people will find you. It took me until my mid twenties. Not that I'm good at making friends and I don't have many, I can count them on one hand.

You are an amazing person, you are worth so much more than your abusive bf. I've been there and still battling through the split(kids involved) but I wish I could turn back time and end it as soon as I noticed the red flags and not continue the generation trauma.

You are stronger than you know.

 

[meowmeow<3]

Your people will find you. It took me until my mid twenties. Not that I'm good at making friends and I don't have many, I can count them on one hand.

You are an amazing person, you are worth so much more than your abusive bf. I've been there and still battling through the split(kids involved) but I wish I could turn back time and end it as soon as I noticed the red flags and not continue the generation trauma.

You are stronger than you know.

Ty, I just wish it was easier. I can't even spend a day without him.

 

[notwavinbutdrowning]

Ty, I just wish it was easier. I can't even spend a day without him.

It is so hard. So hard. Time is the greatest healer, though the slowest. I've found strength in the phrase Illegitimi non carborundum.

 

[Hevn]

I don't find you annoying.
This site is a good place to find friends. Why don't you try?

And it would be a good idea to break off relations with someone who hurts you.

 

[justcallmeJ]

Im sorry this is happening to you. I recommend you find a way to get rid of your "bf". He will only bring you down even more, and you deserve better than that.
And I know how you feel, I always was an outcast at school, only having an abusive friends group. Eventually I got some real ones at college, so maybe you can meet new people there.

I wish you the best<3

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I relate. I don't think I'm ever going to make friends. But I hope that you find some nice friends one day

 

[LeWantsToDie]

I think a lot of people here are very lonely. I relate to you so much - out of the two people who care about me, one is kinda contractually obligated to do so and the other has a lot of other friends so hasn't had enough time for me. No one else talks to me. I've given up on me but I hope you make some friends. You seem pretty nice.

 

[xmissellax]

I'm really sorry life has been so unfair to you. You deserve better

 

[Meteora]

Hm I was in a similar situation at 18. Abusive boyfriend and did not make it to leave him anyway. I don't know what to say really, just that I feel that.
I hope you will find the strength to break up with him.