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CoolGuy9

CoolGuy9

Mage
Mar 5, 2019
524
Me and my friend agreed to play today and I was excited for it. That sadly never happened.

Also with one of my friends I always feel like I am the one starting the conversation and to avoid that feeling, I let her start the next conversation. As a result we haven't talked in a while.

I met this one person online recently who I really enjoyed talking to, but every time I ask if we can play, the answer is always no.

I feel like the only reason people talk to me, because they don't want to be rude. I wish I could just talk to people and have fun and not feel like an annoying idiot. At least I can bitch about my problems in here so at least I have that.
 
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Alwaysbadtime

Alwaysbadtime

Enlightened
Jun 28, 2021
1,158
Ugggg I know what you mean. Perhaps you should word it as "hanging out" instead of "playing". Playing is generally for young kids or horny dudes asking females to have sex.

I relate. It's hard making friends...and it's hard keeping friends. I'm sorry to hear CoolGuy9.
 
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Rayzieka

Rayzieka

Not Really Here
Apr 28, 2021
637
Maybe you just need to find the right people.
However I've noticed the same happened in my life, but a lot of the time it was mainly my fault for falling back on depressing or uninteresting topics. Not saying that you shouldn't express yourself how you want but people seem to fade away from negative things. It's really a shame we can't all have fun talking about what we want. Also I don't want to encourage the same behavior as me but I've noticed getting a bit drunk helps me keep people interested since my brain finds more dumb stuff to pull people in with.
 
CoolGuy9

CoolGuy9

Mage
Mar 5, 2019
524
Ugggg I know what you mean. Perhaps you should word it as "hanging out" instead of "playing". Playing is generally for young kids or horny dudes asking females to have sex.

I relate. It's hard making friends...and it's hard keeping friends. I'm sorry to hear CoolGuy9.
Thank you. Lately I have been pretty lonely sadly.
Maybe you just need to find the right people.
However I've noticed the same happened in my life, but a lot of the time it was mainly my fault for falling back on depressing or uninteresting topics. Not saying that you shouldn't express yourself how you want but people seem to fade away from negative things. It's really a shame we can't all have fun talking about what we want. Also I don't want to encourage the same behavior as me but I've noticed getting a bit drunk helps me keep people interested since my brain finds more dumb stuff to pull people in with.
Easier said than done, but agreed. I only really have one friend irl and we don't really share that much in common. Also I'm pretty sure he now finds me a bit annoying after bitching about my problems with him.

The uninteresting topics one scares me, because sometimes I don't know what to talk about and then I fear that what I will start to talk about is boring. I also definitively do have problems with talking about sad depressing topics, because if I'm feeling that way, I want to talk about it, but then I'll make the other person feel frustrated, but if I don't want to talk about it, it keeps bugging me and then I'll feel lonely even though I'm talking to someone. I wish I could just make my depression go away when I'm talking to someone and then we could have a happy conversation about the weather or something.

Also I have noticed the same effect when I'm drunk. Not really interested in alcohol or drugs anymore after one bad incident.
 
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Rayzieka

Rayzieka

Not Really Here
Apr 28, 2021
637
Easier said than done, but agreed. I only really have one friend irl and we don't really share that much in common. Also I'm pretty sure he now finds me a bit annoying after bitching about my problems with him.

The uninteresting topics one scares me, because sometimes I don't know what to talk about and then I fear that what I will start to talk about is boring. I also definitively do have problems with talking about sad depressing topics, because if I'm feeling that way, I want to talk about it, but then I'll make the other person feel frustrated, but if I don't want to talk about it, it keeps bugging me and then I'll feel lonely even though I'm talking to someone. I wish I could just make my depression go away when I'm talking to someone and then we could have a happy conversation about the weather or something.

Also I have noticed the same effect when I'm drunk. Not really interested in alcohol or drugs anymore after one bad incident.
I hope you can find some people to do things with. Have you tried finding movie watching friends? Brings up lots of things to comment and laugh about.
 
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CoolGuy9

CoolGuy9

Mage
Mar 5, 2019
524
I hope you can find some people to do things with. Have you tried finding movie watching friends? Brings up lots of things to comment and laugh about.
Can't say that I have. Where would I find a movie watching friend? This is a new concept for me.
 
Rayzieka

Rayzieka

Not Really Here
Apr 28, 2021
637
Can't say that I have. Where would I find a movie watching friend? This is a new concept for me.
Well I was distraught one night and found a reddit for making friends and you can pretty much ask for any type of friend there and you'll probably get some replies. Discord is pretty good for watching the movies once you find someone since you can screen share while calling.
 
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CoolGuy9

CoolGuy9

Mage
Mar 5, 2019
524
Well I was distraught one night and found a reddit for making friends and you can pretty much ask for any type of friend there and you'll probably get some replies. Discord is pretty good for watching the movies once you find someone since you can screen share while calling.
I'll check to see if I can find a good community on reddit. Thanks friend.
 
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S

suisuiforum

Experienced
Jul 4, 2021
239
A lot of what you've written here is incredibly relatable. I strongly believe that the only reason people talk to me irl is out of obligation or they'll appear rude if they don't follow the typical social rituals inundated by society. It also seems like everything I bring up is uninteresting in the opinion of most people, so I just don't talk as much anymore and only comment on what other people say first, but that's also seen as boring if you don't bring up anything new. There's no way to win, and I don't have good advice since I'm clearly struggling with this also, but I hope you meet people who appreciate you and want to hang out.
 
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CoolGuy9

CoolGuy9

Mage
Mar 5, 2019
524
A lot of what you've written here is incredibly relatable. I strongly believe that the only reason people talk to me irl is out of obligation or they'll appear rude if they don't follow the typical social rituals inundated by society. It also seems like everything I bring up is uninteresting in the opinion of most people, so I just don't talk as much anymore and only comment on what other people say first, but that's also seen as boring if you don't bring up anything new. There's no way to win, and I don't have good advice since I'm clearly struggling with this also, but I hope you meet people who appreciate you and want to hang out.
This is probably a pretty common. Especially on this website. I don't know if this is a good idea, but maybe there could be a mega thread on this website all about helping people with depression and one part of it could be about helping people cope with loneliness and how to be social. This website after all is surprising supportive when it comes to getting rid of your problems.
 
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Y

Yiyo123

Member
Apr 24, 2020
94
I don't really consider a friend someone that replies to one of my comments or topics of discussion.
 
Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ I'm............
Jul 1, 2020
7,031
i know what you mean. im almost always the one starting the conversations, like 14/15. but for some reason when i was reading your post i started to wonder if maybe some people just find more topics to talk about compared to others. i know ive been told on multiple occasions that people find it interesting in the things im interested in. really 'basic' things. but by finding it interesting it gives me something to mention that maybe they wouldnt have bothered with because it wasnt interesting enough to talk about in their eyes.
 
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DunnoWhyButYeah

DunnoWhyButYeah

~*-*~
Apr 3, 2020
399
That is how I feel ... And now I'm little scared to start any conversations anymore, because I don't think so anyone would want to talk with me.

I know that one my friend just don't remember answer to me (that sounds really bad x)), and I accept that but it still doesn't feel good to me when I'm super lonely at same time.

I had friends who wanted to play and chat with me, but now everyone are busy and I don't have anyone anymore ... well I have my "stalker", but I don't have any "normal" people around me, who is interested to spend time with me online.
 
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CoolGuy9

CoolGuy9

Mage
Mar 5, 2019
524
That is how I feel ... And now I'm little scared to start any conversations anymore, because I don't think so anyone would want to talk with me.

I know that one my friend just don't remember answer to me (that sounds really bad x)), and I accept that but it still doesn't feel good to me when I'm super lonely at same time.

I had friends who wanted to play and chat with me, but now everyone are busy and I don't have anyone anymore ... well I have my "stalker", but I don't have any "normal" people around me, who is interested to spend time with me online.
It really sucks when someone doesn't remember to answer when you are lonely. You kind of understand, but you still take it as a sign that people find you boring which I hate. I miss the days of being a kid: everything was so much better back then.
 
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insanedoomer

insanedoomer

Zé"HaZarD
Jan 10, 2021
244
Hey coolGuys , i am here if you want to talk .
 
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