
LenkaX
Maybe there is a hope!
- Aug 14, 2020
- 366
I mean... I feel like a ghost already. I'm afraid that after a suicidal death my presence will still continue and I will possibly not be even aware of it. My mind will continue existing but I will not be able to interact with anything anymore.
Now I live like a complete "nothing" with no friends, no work and no gf. I think that this nothingness will be retained and I will exist in it for a long time.
In past I've read lots of Blavatsky's theosophical work and unfortunately I chose to believe it. According to her and her followers, suicide makes things only worse. Haven't I read this work, I would have been already dead. But I have a big fear of what might come. Therefore I miss every opportunity when I'm occasionally home alone for few days in a year.
I don't want to kill myself, I want that I never existed at all, which is strangely not possible.
Now I live like a complete "nothing" with no friends, no work and no gf. I think that this nothingness will be retained and I will exist in it for a long time.
In past I've read lots of Blavatsky's theosophical work and unfortunately I chose to believe it. According to her and her followers, suicide makes things only worse. Haven't I read this work, I would have been already dead. But I have a big fear of what might come. Therefore I miss every opportunity when I'm occasionally home alone for few days in a year.
I don't want to kill myself, I want that I never existed at all, which is strangely not possible.