I don't love my family so I won't feel bad

[boingo]

My family have abused me emotionally and controlled my life from childhood into adulthood and I don't feel any love for them, I just feel hatred towards them. So I won't feel bad about leaving them behind. They're the kind of people who say suicide is selfish, all the while being abusive to me.
I don't have any friends or feel any connection to anyone that I know, so I feel like people don't understand me and I'm suffering alone. I wrote a bucket list but I haven't been able to get any of the things done because of my health declining and also anxiety. Has anyone else written a bucket list?

 

[Trakehner]

I have a list of things that I wish to do before I'm gone forever but probably won't get around to doing most of it.

 

[sylvaticus]

Go live in some far away place; I don't feel I have the courage to do it anymore. But it's the only thing at this point that could perhaps alleviate my depression and chronic stress. My current environment is unbelievably toxic

 

[boingo]

Go live in some far away place; I don't feel I have the courage to do it anymore. But it's the only thing at this point that could perhaps alleviate my depression and chronic stress. My current environment is unbelievably toxic

Same, I wanted to go on vacation to another country but when I looked into it I think it's just too much for me.