Venting I deserve to die

[numbed one]

I'm a worthless peace of shit who deserves to die . Any relates ?

 

[killmepleasefast]

it relate to me !!! everyday i feel that

 

[NoIdeaForAUsername]

I'm a worthless peace of shit who deserves to die . Any relates ?

I also relate. Im a social parasite, unable to be productive. Everytime i've got something good in my life like friendly people / job / girlfirend - i always subconsciously did things to ruin that and then feel like i'm a victim of these people meanness. So im just sitting now on my chair, doing nothing, being completly alone, hated by dozens of people, watching as everything around colapses and living with memories of all of these times when i actually had a chance, but blew it.

I very much deserve to die, because that is the natural order of things - weak and failures needs to die - this is how nature makes species capable to survive - weak dies and strong reproduces, but because all of that technological and social progress we (humanity) achieved a position that allows us to keep weak people alive and this is a reason why people like me are still capable to be there, breath and eat resourcess that could've been used by other people that are actually productive.

I know i should die, but i can't force myself to actually do it. That's the irony of weakness - you are too weak to have a right to live, but you are also too weak to stop living, because that would paradoxically require an actuall strength to "pull the trigger", which obviously im not even close to have.

 

[numbed one]

I also relate. Im a social parasite, unable to be productive. Everytime i've got something good in my life like friendly people / job / girlfirend - i always subconsciously did things to ruin that and then feel like i'm a victim of these people meanness. So im just sitting now on my chair, doing nothing, being completly alone, hated by dozens of people, watching as everything around colapses and living with memories of all of these times when i actually had a chance, but blew it.

I very much deserve to die, because that is the natural order of things - weak and failures needs to die - this is how nature makes species capable to survive - weak dies and strong reproduces, but because all of that technological and social progress we (humanity) achieved a position that allows us to keep weak people alive and this is a reason why people like me are still capable to be there, breath and eat resourcess that could've been used by other people that are actually productive.

I know i should die, but i can't force myself to actually do it. That's the irony of weakness - you are too weak to have a right to live, but you are also too weak to stop living, because that would paradoxically require an actuall strength to "pull the trigger", which obviously im not even close to have.

Same thing hère , if i had a gun .. that would bé another story

 

[NoIdeaForAUsername]

Same thing hère , if i had a gun .. that would bé another story

or you just think that. It is equally possible that having an actual gun and being able to do it so easly would give you nothing - you would still have troubles with pressing that trigger. If you never shoot yourself in head you cannot know that

 

[R_N]

It is sad to see so many people turning their anger inwards when their "crimes" pale in comparison to people who don't have any guilty conscious whatsoever.

Emotions are emotions I guess and some people differ. But in the end nothing really matters at all. Death comes for everyone and nature doesn't have morals. It just is.

I feel if some people were aware of that they would stop torturing themselves at least somewhat. I for one ended up as something society would call a total failure and I am unhealthy but it would be stupid of me to take humans seriously. Especially after they made me disabled. But more so because of the fact that humans know nothing. They just follow societal rules and their dna like sheep. We all are. That is why I would never take emotions as a fact and go torture myself because things are not like some little human said they should be. That would be a waste of any life left in me.

I managed to realise this but I have some empathy for people stuck in that limbo. I have a friend like that. He is well off but he still can't see past the societal so he always obsesses over human made stuff like rat races and comparisons.

I still see myself as a puppet but when I am aware of that fact and can even change my behaviour and see beyond human made concepts, it helps to ease this hell.