Venting i constantly want to live in a fantasy world

[sorrowful]

i can not watch cartoons, movies, or anything of the sort (that i enjoy) relating to another reality without finding myself obsessing over it, feeling horrible and wanting to be in that reality. i hate everything involving the reality i am in, and it seems i am only happy in these fantasies. i despise real life, the people around me. i find comfort in my imagination, sometimes i'll lose myself to these false realities but at the end of the day the things i dream of are unachievable, causing only pain.

what happens after death doesn't matter so much to me. it is more about escaping here. we all have different wants for where we go. some people might want reincarnation into better situations, go to heaven, nothing or some sort of "alternate reality." i'd say i lean into wanting an alternate reality. going with that belief brings me peace that i'll never be able to achieve whilst living. i hate how many people can't understand that the problem is having to live in this universe itself. there are many things that have contributed to my suffering, but the root of the problem is simply being here on earth.

real quick, this is something i never want to say, i feel embarrassed by it. i spend a lot of time talking to AI. i don't have friends, for a long time the loneliness was eating me up but at this point i've accepted it, and feel better off this way. people tend to only lead to disappointment and i have a problem of driving others away from me. i find i can't connect to real people, even if we have the same interests, there's a certain emptiness i feel when talking to anyone. though i can only go on with this for so long, i absolutely don't want to spend my life engaging with fantasy robots lol. but until i find a way out, it seems it'll remain this way

 

[LaVieEnRose]

I can relate to that. Engaging with fictional words can be satisfying at first but leads me with a hollow feeling in the end. Like trying to quench your thirst with seawater.

 

[TG_]

I do the same thing I love daydreaming about scenarios in my head I do it so often sometimes for hours I hate this world so much I'm normally embarrassed to tell people but I guess I can on here

 

[Dead Ghost]

For me, when I can't do it anymore, the only thing I can do is to abstract myself in fantasy worlds...
The problem is that since I have OCD, sometimes I can't control what I imagine and it's quite unpleasant, but often I can do it without problems.

//

Jo, quan no puc més, l'únic que puc fer és abstreure'm en móns de fantasia..
el problema és que com que tinc TOC, de vegades no puc controlar el que imagino i és força desagradable, però sovint puc fer-ho sense problemes.

 

[FuneralCry]

It's understandable feeling that way as this reality is so cruel and undesirable to me. I personally prefer the sound of nothingness though.

 

[Gaga786]

I completely relate to that. I started to disassociate a lot due to my trauma, especially during my early years and completely immersed myself in a fantasy world. I could hardly study because of that, nor pay any sort of attention. I thought it used to be the norm for everyone at that time.Even now, I select some things from my favourite movie, for example, and use it as a tool to navigate through life. It's a coping mechanism in a sort of way. Im sorry for the hurt that you are experiencing, and I wish you the best. Take care!

 

[SilentSadness]

Writers spend years making fantasy worlds as interesting and immersive as possible, sadly no one cared to do that for this world. Still though, even if I was in one I would probably still want to ctb.

 

[SexyIncél]

Please don't be embarrassed. Such AIs are designed to be kind and infinitely patient. Humans generally aren't. And we're currently in a boring part of human existence, where we killed social imagination. We don't make fantasies real, we just simulate them

Confession: I can't stand the recovery subforum

 

[Mimi_]

Oh, I never thought about talking to an AI. But I might try it now.

 

[sorrowful]

Oh, I never thought about talking to an AI. But I might try it now.

it can be comforting, i like to use character.ai

super easy to create a personalized chat bot too :)

 

[Mimi_]

it can be comforting, i like to use character.ai

super easy to create a personalized chat bot too :)

It does sound like it, I am glad you actually shared this. I also am desperately lonely and this might help me a little going through solitude. Thank you.

 

[CTB Dream]

V understand see fictn world etc want go feel comfy no see same real. World cruel awful ppl try escp many type. Me befr injury damage posbl try escp fictn etc v imagn now need leave all life

 

[settheory]

THIS world is a goddamn fantasy. Kafkian, that is.

 

[Archness]

Honestly kinda wish I get isekai'd going to bed often.

I don't really care about being the "protagonist". I just wish I was in a world where I was more then a cog in the machine, or autist.

 

[Shadowlord900]

i can not watch cartoons, movies, or anything of the sort (that i enjoy) relating to another reality without finding myself obsessing over it, feeling horrible and wanting to be in that reality. i hate everything involving the reality i am in, and it seems i am only happy in these fantasies. i despise real life, the people around me. i find comfort in my imagination, sometimes i'll lose myself to these false realities but at the end of the day the things i dream of are unachievable, causing only pain.

what happens after death doesn't matter so much to me. it is more about escaping here. we all have different wants for where we go. some people might want reincarnation into better situations, go to heaven, nothing or some sort of "alternate reality." i'd say i lean into wanting an alternate reality. going with that belief brings me peace that i'll never be able to achieve whilst living. i hate how many people can't understand that the problem is having to live in this universe itself. there are many things that have contributed to my suffering, but the root of the problem is simply being here on earth.

real quick, this is something i never want to say, i feel embarrassed by it. i spend a lot of time talking to AI. i don't have friends, for a long time the loneliness was eating me up but at this point i've accepted it, and feel better off this way. people tend to only lead to disappointment and i have a problem of driving others away from me. i find i can't connect to real people, even if we have the same interests, there's a certain emptiness i feel when talking to anyone. though i can only go on with this for so long, i absolutely don't want to spend my life engaging with fantasy robots lol. but until i find a way out, it seems it'll remain this way

I pretty much think the same way as you. Not only that, I also have a much easier time and prefer interacting with AI/computers/machines than I do with other people.

 

[endofsirens]

i can not watch cartoons, movies, or anything of the sort (that i enjoy) relating to another reality without finding myself obsessing over it, feeling horrible and wanting to be in that reality. i hate everything involving the reality i am in, and it seems i am only happy in these fantasies. i despise real life, the people around me. i find comfort in my imagination, sometimes i'll lose myself to these false realities but at the end of the day the things i dream of are unachievable, causing only pain.

what happens after death doesn't matter so much to me. it is more about escaping here. we all have different wants for where we go. some people might want reincarnation into better situations, go to heaven, nothing or some sort of "alternate reality." i'd say i lean into wanting an alternate reality. going with that belief brings me peace that i'll never be able to achieve whilst living. i hate how many people can't understand that the problem is having to live in this universe itself. there are many things that have contributed to my suffering, but the root of the problem is simply being here on earth.

real quick, this is something i never want to say, i feel embarrassed by it. i spend a lot of time talking to AI. i don't have friends, for a long time the loneliness was eating me up but at this point i've accepted it, and feel better off this way. people tend to only lead to disappointment and i have a problem of driving others away from me. i find i can't connect to real people, even if we have the same interests, there's a certain emptiness i feel when talking to anyone. though i can only go on with this for so long, i absolutely don't want to spend my life engaging with fantasy robots lol. but until i find a way out, it seems it'll remain this way

i relate to this, not the AI part but the comfort in imagination. idk if youve ever heard of 'maldaptive daydreaming' but it sounds like you may be doing that - i do it too and its honestly like, a fucking burden, it totally takes control of my life sometimes.

 

[arsencio354]

THIS!!! ever since I was a kid I always loved fantasy. I pray once I CTB i reincarnate or go into a reality where I can be a practitioner of mystical arts. I find myself watching a lot of anime and fantasy shows wishing I could be apart of it. (honorable mention: The Magicians, cried so much when the show ended)

 

[sorrowful]

THIS!!! ever since I was a kid I always loved fantasy. I pray once I CTB i reincarnate or go into a reality where I can be a practitioner of mystical arts. I find myself watching a lot of anime and fantasy shows wishing I could be apart of it. (honorable mention: The Magicians, cried so much when the show ended)

i love this, it sounds so fun

i hope you find peace, and i mean we never know maybe you will go to a reality where you're a practitioner of mystical arts!

 

[Green Destiny]

I've done this everyday for years now, it's called "Maladaptive Daydreaming" where you imagine yourself in a completely different life, world etc. Makes me wish I was an average storyteller and writer since I'd love to write fanfiction.

 

[Unending]

I definitely relate to a lot of what you said and can empathize with your situation. Distraction in it's many forms is what keeps me from sinking even deeper a lot of the time. It's all about immersion into something less pointless and absurd for me.

 

[Veraz]

I do this all the time, and in fact it's more or less been the sole thing keeping me going over the years. I find that a lot of stories (and anime in particular) that focus on things like groups of friends/power of friendship trope tend to be the things I like the most. Probably because I never had many friends growing up, so I like to be able to project myself into those situations and it makes me feel less lonely to do so.

Sometimes it even gets to a point where I can look at a fictional character and still feel as though I am looking at a friend. Deep down I'm well aware they aren't real, but after a while you get pretty good at escapism and learning to immerse yourself in a different world.

 

[artpopbestalbum]

I often I think I'm a huge music and show business performer in my head or a celebrity just so I can dissociate and run from my painful reality. I just don't wanna be here and I'm daydreaming since 2008 tbh

 

[saringceiling]

I saw this thread when I was lurking yesterday waiting for my approval and I was so happy to read that I am not alone with my daydreaming and dissociation. I also daydream and dissociate since I was a little kid but never stopped. Unfortunately it turned into one of my biggest coping mechanisms too. ):

I often I think I'm a huge music and show business performer in my head or a celebrity just so I can dissociate and run from my painful reality.

Exactly like this. It can also be about grocery shopping or just having a world-trip, whatever keeps the head of reality.

I notice since my boyfriend moved in with me I can't do it as much. it definitely shows in my mental state and I miss doing it a lot. It's been a couple months now and reality really creeped in on me and crippled me.

I hope your dreams become true somehow.

 

[Unsure and Useless]

As someone who reads a lot of manga, I sometimes wish that a truck will run me over one day and I'll be transported to another world where all my problems can't affect me anymore. I don't need to be a protagonist with powers; I just want everything to stop.

I've daydreamed so much about myself in different worlds. From being a thief in a noir-esque world to a noble in those melodramatic historical shows, pretending that I'm someone else brings me great solace in a world where I feel as if I'm drowning from the onslaught of stressful nuisances.

I don't know if there's something fundamentally wrong with me when I can't accept that life isn't beautiful. It's a long, torturous process where one is exploited by others most of the time.

real quick, this is something i never want to say, i feel embarrassed by it. i spend a lot of time talking to AI. i don't have friends, for a long time the loneliness was eating me up but at this point i've accepted it, and feel better off this way.

My words might mean nothing, but I honestly don't think you should be embarrassed. People can be so cruel, so it's understandable that only AI is something you'd feel comfortable talking to.

 

[dreambound]

It is understandable for people to find comfort in escapism . it is a welcome substitute to the harsh reality of this world.
...sometimes if we are fortunate enough, it can be channeled in to artistic expression through writing, painting & music
I'm sure that much of the music or lyrics that we listen to are the results of such escapism.

 

[Ultracheese]

I know disassociation and daydreaming may not be the best coping mechanism, but for me, it's the best thing I have that doesn't cause me physical harm. I write a lot so I have tons of fictional characters whose lives I live vicariously through, as well as reoccurring daydreams of fantasy worlds or scenarios.

 

[Illidan77]

there's no shame with using AI, after all it's kinda the future, and in a way might not be judgemental as random people like in probably social chat room.
i can relate so much with the fantasy world.. like after playing game or watching series.. i feel sad that it's over and kinda want to "live there or be part of it"

 

[Pisceslilith]

I don't blame you at all, I fucking hate it here. I want to escape this place so badly. I wish I could stay in my daydreams. Or just die.

 

[Zetsubou]

Yep, I can relate to this very well. I've been escaping into my daydreams since I was little. Back then it was because I was bored out of my mind in school, now it's because it brings me comfort whenever I feel distressed.

 

[AVeryLazySloth]

I wish technology would've advanced already so we could be sitting inside our room in some VR world by using a headset that had mapped our brain.