I can't sleep

[Water-Lily]

It's not like I "can't" sleep physcially

When I do sleep (now that I'm not home) I love being in bed

I feel because I'm away from the abuse my body and mind can allow itself to sleep peacefully. As I am not in survival mode 24/7

But I've encountered a new problem

I feel everything. The bad feelings feel more intense

I knew this was going to happen

I felt so bad last week I wanted to drink myself to death to forget all the traumatic memories

I hate that I have this burden of having to "fight" and "survive"

Why can't it be ok to not wake up and die in your sleep?

Or just kill yourself?

Sure people will feel bad, but if they haven't spent a day in your shoes how can they know?

A part of me genuinely feels the only way to deal with my problems is suicide

 

[Unattainable666]

I know exactly how you feel. I haven't slept good in years. I usually go to bed around 11 pm and wake up between 1 am and 2 am. I can't shut my mind off.

 

[Naked Weapon]

I certainly feel for you. I've taken to pills to get myself to sleep because I need to "be unconscious now" lest my thoughts torture me. I wish one could have even a moment of quiet; the world, however is never so kind as to grant that wish.