I both like and dislike the fact this site exists

[EvisceratedJester]

I realise virtually nobody is going to agree with me but I'm interested about you guys opinions on this regardless. Im glad this site exists for the fact that it allows a unique place where you're not judged for being suicidal. I think the fact that it provides more painless ways to CTB is actually great. I also think this site is good for the fact it allows people to vent, as well as find like minded people, especially since suicide is such a taboo topic usually. It feels like on paper this site existing is just fine.
The thing I dislike about this site existing is its capacity to influence people negatively (I'm not sure if that's the right way to put it but bear with me). [U]I wouldn't really ever consider myself suicidal, not that I would consider myself 'pro life' either, but I'm not really suicidal. That being said, after spending quite a bit of time on this site for the past few days I found myself seriously considering CTB for the first time in years.[/U] That happening might say more about me than it does about the site, but it still kinda rubbed me the wrong way. I can't help but think that people who would've never truly considered CTB or had the nerve to do it were driven to it by this site.

so basically I cant decide wether I'd rather this site does exist, or it doesn't.

Most of the people who decide to go on to this site were already suicidal prior to finding this place, so I don't get the point of worrying about people who aren't suicidal becoming suicidal because of this site. I've been suicidal for a long time and this site hasn't made my suicidal thoughts any worse then they were prior. Hell, around a month prior to me making an account here I walked straight into a Home Depot and bought a snap-off knife with the intent of using it to kill myself. I think it's safe to assume that for the majority of us, we were already thinking of and planning to go through with ctb long prior to using this site.


I have seen a lot of people on here who have also described the opposite of what you are saying, too. There are people on here who have found that this site actually helped them better cope with their suicidal thoughts and played an important role in their recovery. The only person who is responsible for you is you. If you find that this site is negatively affecting you then you can leave. Simple as that.

At the end of the day, you need to realize that this is meant to be a place for people going through suicidal thoughts. If you don't suffer from suicidal ideation then it's understandable that you wouldn't end up benefitting that much from being here and may you even find that place makes you feel like shit. That's fine. It's even expected! But you need to understand that most of the people on here are currently suicidal so the way an average SaSu user is affected by this place may differ from how you are affected by this place.

 

[Cessation]

I would say for me, as someone brand new to this site, I like that there's a community of people I can relate to, since there's nobody I'm really close to by any metric in my personal life. But I hate that our world can be such a terrible place that anyone else has to go through anything similar to---let alone worse than---what I have. It helps to find people you can relate to, but it's pretty heartbreaking when what you have to relate is.... well, the desire to leave existence behind for good.

To sum that up a little more concisely: the fact of this site existing is a comfort to anyone looking for the exit or (for preferance) support and understanding; the fact of its necessity is heart-rending.

 

[Nothing………………….]

Most of the people who decide to go on to this site were already suicidal prior to finding this place, so I don't get the point of worrying about people who aren't suicidal becoming suicidal because of this site. I've been suicidal for a long time and this site hasn't made my suicidal thoughts any worse then they were prior. Hell, around a month prior to me making an account here I walked straight into a Home Depot and bought a snap-off knife with the intent of using it to kill myself. I think it's safe to assume that for the majority of us, we were already thinking of and planning to go through with ctb long prior to using this site.


I have seen a lot of people on here who have also described the opposite of what you are saying, too. There are people on here who have found that this site actually helped them better cope with their suicidal thoughts and played an important role in their recovery. The only person who is responsible for you is you. If you find that this site is negatively affecting you then you can leave. Simple as that.

At the end of the day, you need to realize that this is meant to be a place for people going through suicidal thoughts. If you don't suffer from suicidal ideation then it's understandable that you wouldn't end up benefitting that much from being here and may you even find that place makes you feel like shit. That's fine. It's even expected! But you need to understand that most of the people on here are currently suicidal so the way an average SaSu user is affected by this place may differ from how you are affected by this place.

I do think its possible to considee ctb, and as a result find this site, without ever actually having the nerve to do it. So therefore im sure its possible for someone who never would have otherwise gone through with a ctb attempt to be pushed to do so by this site.

In terms of all the other points you've made, ive already made responses to a couple other replies similar to yours, so if you care then you can look at those.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I do think its possible to considee ctb, and as a result find this site, without ever actually having the nerve to do it. So therefore im sure its possible for someone who never would have otherwise gone through with a ctb attempt to be pushed to do so by this site.

In terms of all the other points you've made, ive already made responses to a couple other replies similar to yours, so if you care then you can look at those.

Somebody who just randomly stumbles over to this site or who checks out this site out of curiousity without having ever been suicidal before is more likely to just scroll around for a few minutes before leaving and never coming here again. It's very unlikely that they'll find this site to have that big of an impact on them outside of being weirded out by this place. We know this because plenty of people have done just that before. I've even seen people who were suicidal but never intended to act on those feelings who have done this before. You're basically the exception to the rule, since you decided to create an account instead and hang out here. As stated before, you are responsible for you. That is something that applies to everyone. If you go somewhere online and find that it has a negative affect on your thinking and well-being the you can just leave.

At the end of the day, this site is for suicidal people. Not to be rude, but I don't get the point of you making an account here in order to just question and observe us. It comes off as sort of invasive. If this site is affecting you negatively then you should just leave.

 

[Abyssal]

I agree with this. There's a lot of words in this thread so forgive me if I missed something, I am too lazy to read it all.

It's a shame a site like this must exist, but ultimately it must. I hate that we live an existence where people must turn to suicide, but the way that life is and the lack of fairness/ineffective treatments require another solution. It sucks, but suicide is an effective option and taking away the knowledge of how to ctb peacefully is only going to lead to more botched attempts, lack of understanding of prevention effectiveness (this is me thinking idealistically), and a lot of endured pain.

 

[Nothing………………….]

Somebody who just randomly stumbles over to this site or who checks out this site out of curiousity without having ever been suicidal before is more likely to just scroll around for a few minutes before leaving and never coming here again. It's very unlikely that they'll find this site to have that big of an impact on them outside of being weirded out by this place. We know this because plenty of people have done just that before. I've even seen people who were suicidal but never intended to act on those feelings who have done this before. You're basically the exception to the rule, since you decided to create an account instead and hang out here. As stated before, you are responsible for you. That is something that applies to everyone. If you go somewhere online and find that it has a negative affect on your thinking and well-being the you can just leave.

At the end of the day, this site is for suicidal people. Not to be rude, but I don't get the point of you making an account here in order to just question and observe us. It comes off as sort of invasive. If this site is affecting you negatively then you should just leave.

I'm just gonna do bullet points since Im too stupid to write cohesively
1. This site isn't affecting me negatively as I have enough self awareness to realise where my thoughts are coming from, my point was that other more impressionable people (such as minors because let's be real this is the internet and realistically there are minors on this site) might be affected more
2. My point isn't that people who have never been suicidal before could be affected, it's that already suicidal people who are on this site, who never would've had the nerve to CTB could be pushed to do so.
3. I guess 'question and observe' isn't technically wrong but I don't mean to be invasive. I want to be a more open minded and accepting person, hence I would like to learn more about the kind of mindset that people generally have on this site, and the only way I can do that is by asking questions (I try to look at past threads where possible but I don't have enough time to comprehensIvely search through everything). You could make the argument that I don't need to know about the mindset to be accepting of it, but it personally helps me, as it's much easier to make it feel like a legitimate mindset if I know the logic and feelings behind it
4. My posts aren't meant to be one sided, they are meant as discussions, and for people who want to discuss. I understand that that's not the reason that most people use this site, but I'm not expecting most people to respond, only the ones that want to.
5. I usually make my intentions pretty clear in the original post and as such I assume that everyone responding is ok with those intentions.

 

[Nothing………………….]

I agree with this. There's a lot of words in this thread so forgive me if I missed something, I am too lazy to read it all.

It's a shame a site like this must exist, but ultimately it must. I hate that we live an existence where people must turn to suicide, but the way that life is and the lack of fairness/ineffective treatments require another solution. It sucks, but suicide is an effective option and taking away the knowledge of how to ctb peacefully is only going to lead to more botched attempts, lack of understanding of prevention effectiveness (this is me thinking idealistically), and a lot of endured pain.

Yep, even though I say I don't know which Id pick in my original post, I think I've come to the decision now that I'd rather the site stay up. (For various reasons but even in the original post I gave multiple reasons as to why the site should keep existing, and only one for why it shouldn't)

Also it's fine if you don't read the whole thread, I just think its just poor manners to see my post, not read any of the previous replies, then make an insulting reply to my post which does nothing but retrace points that have already been covered in the thread. Also I just don't really feel like re-explaining my points every time since most people don't care.

 

[ThanatosFindMe]

Most of the people who decide to go on to this site were already suicidal prior to finding this place, so I don't get the point of worrying about people who aren't suicidal becoming suicidal because of this site. I've been suicidal for a long time and this site hasn't made my suicidal thoughts any worse then they were prior. Hell, around a month prior to me making an account here I walked straight into a Home Depot and bought a snap-off knife with the intent of using it to kill myself. I think it's safe to assume that for the majority of us, we were already thinking of and planning to go through with ctb long prior to using this site.


I have seen a lot of people on here who have also described the opposite of what you are saying, too. There are people on here who have found that this site actually helped them better cope with their suicidal thoughts and played an important role in their recovery. The only person who is responsible for you is you. If you find that this site is negatively affecting you then you can leave. Simple as that.

At the end of the day, you need to realize that this is meant to be a place for people going through suicidal thoughts. If you don't suffer from suicidal ideation then it's understandable that you wouldn't end up benefitting that much from being here and may you even find that place makes you feel like shit. That's fine. It's even expected! But you need to understand that most of the people on here are currently suicidal so the way an average SaSu user is affected by this place may differ from how you are affected by this place.

I definitely agree with this. I am an occasional user. I come here when the bad thoughts get loud. All the previous times, being here and reading the boards helped me stop those thoughts, at least for a while. A big part of it is knowing that others are going through similar experiences.

 

[Abyssal]

Also it's fine if you don't read the whole thread, I just think its just poor manners to see my post, not read any of the previous replies, then make an insulting reply to my post which does nothing but retrace points that have already been covered in the thread. Also I just don't really feel like re-explaining my points every time since most people don't care.

That was awfully passive aggressive.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I'm just gonna do bullet points since Im too stupid to write cohesively
1. This site isn't affecting me negatively as I have enough self awareness to realise where my thoughts are coming from, my point was that other more impressionable people (such as minors because let's be real this is the internet and realistically there are minors on this site) might be affected more
2. My point isn't that people who have never been suicidal before could be affected, it's that already suicidal people who are on this site, who never would've had the nerve to CTB could be pushed to do so.
3. I guess 'question and observe' isn't technically wrong but I don't mean to be invasive. I want to be a more open minded and accepting person, hence I would like to learn more about the kind of mindset that people generally have on this site, and the only way I can do that is by asking questions (I try to look at past threads where possible but I don't have enough time to comprehensIvely search through everything). You could make the argument that I don't need to know about the mindset to be accepting of it, but it personally helps me, as it's much easier to make it feel like a legitimate mindset if I know the logic and feelings behind it
4. My posts aren't meant to be one sided, they are meant as discussions, and for people who want to discuss. I understand that that's not the reason that most people use this site, but I'm not expecting most people to respond, only the ones that want to.
5. I usually make my intentions pretty clear in the original post and as such I assume that everyone responding is ok with those intentions.

1. The internet is not a babysitter. I genuinely hate the "what about the children" argument. This site is for adults. This site makes it clear that it is for adults. If you are so worried about minors then that concern should be directed towards their parents and guardians.

Not just that, but your argument could be applied to literally any space online. And even then, minors, depending on their age, do still have to be responsibile for themselves. If a 16-year-old is in an adult space online and said space is having a negative affect on them then they should be old enough to know that they should leave.

Also, you were literally complaining about this site making you have thoughts about ctb, so I'm pretty sure that implies it is having a negative affect on you, whether or not you rralize where yourthose thoughts are coming from.

2. I've already addressed that point to some capacity in the other post. Plenty of people who are suicidal but don't plan on ctbing have stumbled across this site before and most leave. Most don't usually want anything to do with this place. The ones who do stay usually just hang out here and don't plan on ctbing anytime soon. And again, people are responsible for themselves. If this site is causing you to start seriously considering ctb then you can leave or head to the recovery section. Nobody is holding you back.

3. Pretty sure you can easily learn about the mindset most people have on this site by just looking and reading through the threads. These questions are unnessecary.

Also, when did I make the argument that you don't need to know the mindset of it to be accepting? My point was that you are the exception to to the rule. Most people who stumble over here will usually just leave after a few minutes and never return again, rather than make an account on here and hanging out.

I honestly don't even understand why you even need to learn about our mindset. As somebody else mentioned, we aren't your lab rats. Whether you mean to or not, you coming here to question us and talking about whether you think this site should stay up or not does come off as invasive. This is a safe space for suicidal people to freely share their thoughts and feelings with each other.

4. I understand you want to have a disscussion and all that but you're telling people to reread your past posts rather then just answering them, and there are going to be people who are going to likely respond to your post out of defensiveness (whether concious of it or not) just based on the question you asked and thus this "discussion" can easily end up turning into one big debate very quickly, so I still don't get the point.

5. Conisdering the fact that somebody felt as though you using us as "lab rats" I would say otherwise, lol.

But anyways, I still don't really get the pint in you being here and questioning us. I feel like most of what you are looking for could still easily be answered through just looking at a few of the threads but I guess that's just my own views on the matter.

Do you do this with other communities? Do you go into other online spaces, like r/MoS or forums for people suffering from certain mental illnesses or whatever and ask the same things?

 

[Ampsvx123]

God does not tempt

 

[Nothing………………….]

That was awfully passive aggressive.

Sorry about that, I didn't mean it to be I just worded it badly.

1. The internet is not a babysitter. I genuinely hate the "what about the children" argument. This site is for adults. This site makes it clear that it is for adults. If you are so worried about minors then that concern should be directed towards their parents and guardians.

Not just that, but your argument could be applied to literally any space online. And even then, minors, depending on their age, do still have to be responsibile for themselves. If a 16-year-old is in an adult space online and said space is having a negative affect on them then they should be old enough to know that they should leave.

Also, you were literally complaining about this site making you have thoughts about ctb, so I'm pretty sure that implies it is having a negative affect on you, whether or not you rralize where yourthose thoughts are coming from.

2. I've already addressed that point to some capacity in the other post. Plenty of people who are suicidal but don't plan on ctbing have stumbled across this site before and most leave. Most don't usually want anything to do with this place. The ones who do stay usually just hang out here and don't plan on ctbing anytime soon. And again, people are responsible for themselves. If this site is causing you to start seriously considering ctb then you can leave or head to the recovery section. Nobody is holding you back.

3. Pretty sure you can easily learn about the mindset most people have on this site by just looking and reading through the threads. These questions are unnessecary.

Also, when did I make the argument that you don't need to know the mindset of it to be accepting? My point was that you are the exception to to the rule. Most people who stumble over here will usually just leave after a few minutes and never return again, rather than make an account on here and hanging out.

I honestly don't even understand why you even need to learn about our mindset. As somebody else mentioned, we aren't your lab rats. Whether you mean to or not, you coming here to question us and talking about whether you think this site should stay up or not does come off as invasive. This is a safe space for suicidal people to freely share their thoughts and feelings with each other.

4. I understand you want to have a disscussion and all that but you're telling people to reread your past posts rather then just answering them, and there are going to be people who are going to likely respond to your post out of defensiveness (whether concious of it or not) just based on the question you asked and thus this "discussion" can easily end up turning into one big debate very quickly, so I still don't get the point.

5. Conisdering the fact that somebody felt as though you using us as "lab rats" I would say otherwise, lol.

But anyways, I still don't really get the pint in you being here and questioning us. I feel like most of what you are looking for could still easily be answered through just looking at a few of the threads but I guess that's just my own views on the matter.

Do you do this with other communities? Do you go into other online spaces, like r/MoS or forums for people suffering from certain mental illnesses or whatever and ask the same things?

1. Fair enough, but even if the site isn't at fault it can still be a negative influence. Wether or not thats grounds for a site being closed down is an entirely different question, but for the sake of the argument I can say that it isn't and your point still stands.
2. Fair enough.
3. I know you're not 'my lab rats'. in terms of why I want to learn about your mindset it's because it's easier to believe that a mindset is valid if I know the logic and feelings behind it. I understand that its a safe space but I'm not saying that you have to respond to my posts or anything, my posts are only meant for those who feel like they want to respond.
4. Yea thats my bad telling people to reread my posts doesn't really help my point. The only reason I was doing so was because it seemed like those people didn't care about what I had to say or my perspective, which is completely ok but in the moment it felt like me repeating myself to them was just redundant, in hindsight now that you say it I agree that's not a good move by me. For the people who respond out of defensiveness I don't really know what I can do about that, I'm sure being clearer about my intentions behind the original post would've helped but beyond that I'm not really sure what I should do. Even if the discussion could end up becoming a debate I might as well still try.
5. to be honest I thought the person saying 'lab rats' was only saying that to be insulting. Also I don't really see how that address my point, they didn't have to reply to my post, and neither does anybody else.

Most of my questions have been answered by looking through other threads, these are just the questions I have left over that I wasn't seeing any other threads or people cover.

I don't ask the same questions, but I do ask questions If there's something I'm not sure on.

Anyway thanks for your response, I realise now that some of the things I was doing were asshole moves by me.

 

[IWishToDie]

The thing I dislike about this site existing is its capacity to influence people negatively (I'm not sure if that's the right way to put it but bear with me). I wouldn't really ever consider myself suicidal, not that I would consider myself 'pro life' either, but I'm not really suicidal. That being said, after spending quite a bit of time on this site for the past few days I found myself seriously considering CTB for the first time in years. That happening might say more about me than it does about the site, but it still kinda rubbed me the wrong way. I can't help but think that people who would've never truly considered CTB or had the nerve to do it were driven to it by this site.

so basically I cant decide wether I'd rather this site does exist, or it doesn't.

Honestly, the rest of the internet and social media is much more likely to drive people towards suicide. This place is like a safe haven for those who are beyond attention-seeking and have finally begun making peace with whatever horrible hand they've been dealt by this life. I disagree with you.

 

[Slow_Farewell]

I get OP's points on this. In my opinion it's a Catch-22 type of situation.

While it is up to the individual's choice, I think one would have to factor in that people, in general, are influenced by things that they have access to, or are exposed to. This is part of the reason why digital marketing is so effective in this day and age, specially if it's targeted. People's patterns, regardless of whether it is purchasing, browsing or interests are can be easily obtained and thus, to a certain extent, guided to a particular outcome.

Going back to the OP's question, I'd say i'd rather have this site exist then not. Personally, it's one of those "It's better to have it than not need it, rather than need it and not have it" kind of things.

 

[Nothing………………….]

I get OP's points on this. In my opinion it's a Catch-22 type of situation.

While it is up to the individual's choice, I think one would have to factor in that people, in general, are influenced by things that they have access to, or are exposed to. This is part of the reason why digital marketing is so effective in this day and age, specially if it's targeted. People's patterns, regardless of whether it is purchasing, browsing or interests are can be easily obtained and thus, to a certain extent, guided to a particular outcome.

Going back to the OP's question, I'd say i'd rather have this site exist then not. Personally, it's one of those "It's better to have it than not need it, rather than need it and not have it" kind of things.

Exactly!

 

[LifeCouldBeADream]

I disagree with this suicide is still going to happen with or without the site and I'd rather there be a repository of sources to do it the right way rather then people permanently messing them self up doing it the wrong way knowledge is power plus there is more then the suicide discussion on here for people who want help to talk to other real members without fear of being placed in the loony bin