P
pando12718
Member
- Aug 1, 2023
- 32
I was really afraid when I started with my journey on suicide. there was a scary hill to go over, a hill I didn't even realize was there, and I believe that there will be many more hills ahead, things like survival instinct, trying to make sure that my setup works. But, I've managed to keep my emotions fairly in check, I am proud of my self for that. I am proud of myself for not lashing out, or freaking out about all this, bit by bit I am finding more comfort in the end of my life. Life offered me meager happiness, it mostly offered me anxiety, inadequacy, loneliness, envy, sadness, pain, suffering, false hopes, delusion and conflict. I think that being human is a curse, it in itself is a mistake. I believe that humanity should not exist. Maybe I would have thought differently if I had better luck in life, but for me, humanity, at the end of the day, is doomed. Death will always come, pain and suffering will always come. happiness and good moments are fleeting. I want to thank you all here for giving me a place to breath in. It's tough to keep this all by myself, not being able to speak to anyone about it, afraid that they might spoil your chances of getting out. I am also grateful that suicide exists, imagine a world where there was no way to take your own life, and you have to die from natural causes or causes that you did not control.