I am a failure with no future

[Kman8777]

My life has deteriorated so much. I remember when I was happy and had hopes that I would be successful in my future, having a good career and maybe getting married. Now, I understand that these hopes are nothing but a mirage. Non-existent. I'm always lethargic and can't control my head. I can't go to sleep anymore without exterior noise as my head won't shut up. I feel utterly useless. I now cry for no real reason. I only provide mono-syllabic answers as I have started hating my family and friends. I think of how I would kill myself everyday. I have thought about cutting, so that I could punish myself for being such a no life loser. I'm 19, and have had enough of life. I just wish I had methadone or SN so that I could kill myself, and I don't want anything to get better. I want this to be my end. I'm thinking this year will be my last. I have decided that if I do ctb, it will be on my birthday. I find it fitting that I should end my time in this misery the same day I entered it.

 

[derpyderpins]

My life has deteriorated so much. I remember when I was happy and had hopes that I would be successful in my future, having a good career and maybe getting married. Now, I understand that these hopes are nothing but a mirage. Non-existent. I'm always lethargic and can't control my head. I can't go to sleep anymore without exterior noise as my head won't shut up. I feel utterly useless. I now cry for no real reason. I only provide mono-syllabic answers as I have started hating my family and friends. I think of how I would kill myself everyday. I have thought about cutting, so that I could punish myself for being such a no life loser. I'm 19, and have had enough of life. I just wish I had methadone or SN so that I could kill myself, and I don't want anything to get better. I want this to be my end. I'm thinking this year will be my last. I have decided that if I do ctb, it will be on my birthday. I find it fitting that I should end my time in this misery the same day I entered it.

Sorry you're having to feel this way.

I promise you, though (and trust me, I know you don't want to hear this. I know it might not help, but it's true, so you need to hear it), no one is a failure at 19. No one is permanently a loser at 19. No matter what your criteria for success and being a winner are, 19 is a bit early to call it.

You've got a lot of issues getting in your way, but plenty of time to work on them. Care more about taking care of yourself than pushing forward for now. You need to get the car repaired in the shop before you try racing it in this state.

 

[dietcokecan]

My life has deteriorated so much. I remember when I was happy and had hopes that I would be successful in my future, having a good career and maybe getting married. Now, I understand that these hopes are nothing but a mirage. Non-existent. I'm always lethargic and can't control my head. I can't go to sleep anymore without exterior noise as my head won't shut up. I feel utterly useless. I now cry for no real reason. I only provide mono-syllabic answers as I have started hating my family and friends. I think of how I would kill myself everyday. I have thought about cutting, so that I could punish myself for being such a no life loser. I'm 19, and have had enough of life. I just wish I had methadone or SN so that I could kill myself, and I don't want anything to get better. I want this to be my end. I'm thinking this year will be my last. I have decided that if I do ctb, it will be on my birthday. I find it fitting that I should end my time in this misery the same day I entered it.

I'm 20 and in the exact same position. I have no life and no dreams, just painful empty existence. If you ever need anyone to talk to I'm here

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

I would kill to be 19 again, on the forefront of the AI technology revolution. If you do somehow find a way to fight through your 20s, please consider getting certified in as many courses on AI as you possbily can. Many are free, including Google's. Also learn up on robotics as much as possiblr. These 2 industries are undeniably the future and you could potentially be setting yourself up for a good ass life. BTW, you're waaaaaayyyyyyy to young to be getting married anyways. You can't even by a drink for christ's sake.

 

[mrtime87]

Wait till you're in your 30s.