Yes, I understand how you feel. I know so many good people that bad things have happened too. If there is some sort of God or higher power, I just don't see why it punishes the 'good'. I don't see what great lesson we are supposed to get from it. It all just seems so sadistic.
I can only conclude that either there is a God and it is malevolent, or that there's some EXTREMELY convoluted bigger plan to all this that is just too big for us to understand or, it's all completely chance.
Having said that, I think some of us become convinced we are prone to 'bad luck' and everything becomes personal- 'Just my luck that it would rain today.' When certain things- like weather just are. They aren't there to persecute anyone. We just become convinced the world is against us when more likely- it doesn't give a shit. Obviously though, that's the lesser crappy things that happen day to day.
It sounds like you went through a major trauma in your youth. I'm so sorry. I imagine a person/ people are responsible for this. It disgusts me that there are people so utterly selfish and evil that they ruin the lives of those around them. That sort of thing tragically does seem to be down to bad luck- to be in the wrong place at the wrong time to come into contact with them. There just isn't a good answer that I can think of. It's just so sad. I'm sorry for what happened to you and where it has brought you.
