Venting Humiliation

[Pallf]

Earlier today I was looking at my birth control pack and thought to myself that I hadn't gotten a text from the pharmacy about having another bc script to pick up. To get more I'd need to see a gyno.

However, I refuse to see a gyno because I was humiliated a year ago by one. I'm a fat fuck, anyone with at least one working eyeball can see that, but the gyno was so angered about it. I got sternly lectured for awhile on that topic. Next on the agenda is discussing my current medications, they question my depression diagnosis and see the meds as just coddling me.

After all that I went to my car and sat and forced myself to not cry; it took me about ten to twenty minutes to gain control of my emotions. I don't like to cry because I see it as weakness and nothing good has ever come from crying. I get laughed at, screamed at, and I feel like a fucking useless idiot.

I'm ok with developing some gynecological issues if it means I never have to see a gyno ever again. I will concentrate on getting my birth control through an online pharmacy.

Anyway, people suck.

 

[mahakaliSS_MahaDurga]

That is awful! Another gyno might be more tactful while talking to you. If he/she makes any unpleasant remarks, you can tell them that it is not their job to comment on your weight or the other medication you are taking.

 

[Xocoyotziin]

Too many doctors think they can take a cursory glance at your diagnoses and know who you really are. Lots of doctors are alright but then there are the arrogant ones who treat you like cattle, and who know you're dependant on them because self-treatment is virtually illegal, and who get off on that fact. They hold you hostage and force you to bow to the authority that they give themselves.

I don't blame you at all, I avoid them as much as possible too. I used to get bitched at for the opposite, being too thin, but the supposed concern for my health was a transparent veil for how she disapproved of my unmanly physique and lack of muscle mass. Somehow personal opinions worm their way into stuff that's supposed to be objective like that, and its easier to get away with it when there's an inherent power imbalance in a doctor-patient relationship. I don't get why society is obsessed with putting these artificial BDSMy, perversely paternal relationships everywhere and forcing perpetual infancy on people.

But anyway when I find a good one I like to keep them around. Don't let that one doctor get to you. At the end of the day they're just a person too, and they're even pitiable if their judgment is that clouded by their ego trip.

 

[Meditation guide]

I've had similar things with doctors who lecture me. I despise doctors. You might do a google search for doctors who will see you online on cam and send a prescription to your pharmacy. It's very common to do this now and easy.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I'm so sorry you had such a negative experience. That doctor sounds terrible, to be honest. If there's an option to leave a review, you should contribute your thoughts as a warning to others. It might dissuade other people from seeing them, potentially saving them from the same mistreatment. Might even cause that doctor's superiors to look into it more.

I think your gynecological health is really important and you owe it to yourself to find the right doctor for you. Even if we experience bad teachers in life, we still need an education. I'm sure there's a right doctor for you.

Sending you hugs!