Discussion How would you feel if you had a bottle of nembutal in your possession

[Endstati0n]

I'd feel so much relief. I think alot of my torment comes from knowing that i'm trapped in this body and now i have to live this life but i just don't want to anymore.
I'd probably go into a manic episode, smiling at everyone i pass and giving homeless people all my money.

P.s: for the unlikely event that you actually get your hands on some N, don't forget to take some antimetic before (Metoclopramid) if you plan on drinking it.

 

[blueebellsss]

I've been thinking about this too. Just the idea of having such an easy, quick way out accessible at any moment is comforting. I wish it wasn't almost impossible to find.

 

[Forveleth]

I would feel pretty dead.

 

[tooafraidtodiez]

Drink it when i feel like it. Only had SN though which is not the nicest way to go.

 

[luke1978qqq]

Free, simply free :)

 

[FuneralCry]

It's all I want and I'd only ever feel so much relief to finally find peace from all future dreadful suffering in this torturous existence that I just always saw as the most terrible mistake, to suffer in this existence will just always be an abomination to me and all I want is for this existence to be all gone, forgotten and erased for me.

I just want true permanent peace from this existence that just causes all this torture and suffering all for the sake of it with no limit as to how much agony one can feel, to exist will always be the most dreadful, painful and futile burden to me and I find it so horrible how a human can suffer for so long just to face the terrible extreme agony of old age, denying Nembutal is such a terrible crime to me and I always suffer so unbearably from how I cannot just access it.

 

[tree.sn]

A lot better

 

[Aflame5926]

free relieve and happyness to be honest. just having the power to go out in my hands gives already big relieves to be honest

 

[markimobzzdeasui]

Probably very lucky, relieved and even thankful I guess

 

[dirkw83]

Amazing But ofcourse we can't have nice things

 

[buriedinmyhead]

I'd feel so much relief. I think alot of my torment comes from knowing that i'm trapped in this body and now i have to live this life but i just don't want to anymore.
I'd probably go into a manic episode, smiling at everyone i pass and giving homeless people all my money.

P.s: for the unlikely event that you actually get your hands on some N, don't forget to take some antimetic before (Metoclopramid) if you plan on drinking it.

Free, so free. N or a shotgun are my ideal methods, but I can't access either due to the laws. If I could have one of them in my possession, everything would feel so much easier, knowing I'd be able to do it.

 

[oneirataxia]

To be honest, I would still prefer to just use a gun.

 

[Serena 2026]

Eu sentiria um enorme alívio. Acho que muito do meu tormento vem de saber que estou presa neste corpo e que agora tenho que viver esta vida, mas simplesmente não quero mais.
Provavelmente entraria em um episódio maníaco, sorrindo para todos que cruzassem meu caminho e dando todo o meu dinheiro para pessoas sem-teto.

P.S.: Na improvável hipótese de você conseguir obter N, não se esqueça de tomar um antiemético antes (Metoclopramida) se

I'd feel so much relief. I think alot of my torment comes from knowing that i'm trapped in this body and now i have to live this life but i just don't want to anymore.
I'd probably go into a manic episode, smiling at everyone i pass and giving homeless people all my money.

P.s: for the unlikely event that you actually get your hands on some N, don't forget to take some antimetic before (Metoclopramid) if you plan on drinking it.

I shared my story in a post here on the forum. I joined at the beginning of the year after scouring the internet for suicide-related sites. I made several naive attempts to end my life without success; I was desperate for answers... I bought the book *The Final Solution*, where I started learning about methods and decided on N. I got my questions answered with the help of some dear friends here on the forum, but then the hardest part began: the search for N... I looked online and soon realized I wouldn't easily find it in my country, until I managed to get it in Peru; I traveled there terrified and came back with the N in my suitcase... So, to answer your question, it's a mix of feelings: 1) I feel proud of my determination, courage, and luck in obtaining N within two months, especially as a mature woman of 65; 2) Happy knowing I hold the solution in my hands and that I'm the one who decides when the right time is for me; 3) Terrified... afraid something might go wrong again, worried about how my body will react—will I feel pain? Will I have a peaceful death? Is the taste really that bad? Basically, I still have so many questions; 4) Sad, because I want to help the many friends here on the forum who ask me for the source, but I can't tell them—it breaks my heart; so many people are suffering. After all, the person who sold it to me would be scared off by huge demand and the risk of police trouble. "N" should be sold in a way that's easier for all of us!! 5) I feel at peace... finally, I'll get some rest from the torment my life has been. I hope my friends can find peace too, and forgive me for not being able to help!!

 

[GodChallengesMe]

More appropriate question is the following: Would you drink it in a heartbeat if the precondition of handing down that drug was that? Not to just keep on the shelf indefinitely for peace of mind but to immediately drink the moment they handed down it to you. Would you do that? Metoclopramide would come as a bonus for not vomiting it up had you accepted the offer.

 

[Endstati0n]

More appropriate question is the following: Would you drink it in a heartbeat if the precondition of handing down that drug was that? Not to just keep on the shelf indefinitely for peace of mind but to immediately drink the moment they handed down it to you. Would you do that? Metoclopramide would come as a bonus for not vomiting it up had you accepted the offer.

Yes i'd drink it immediatly if that was the condition. If not, i'd like to enjoy some time knowing i have this option. It would take away so much pain. I'd do some drugs most likely and just chill out before taking it