how to lessen the impact to the people around you ?

[inevitabl_discomfort]

so i've been thinking this a lot , and i don't really want to hurt the people i love i just need them to understand that it's not their fault and there is nothing they could have done to make me want to live and that i am just tired of living, and it's totally my okay to forget me and just respect my choice , i had in mind to make some video where i explain all that and try to make them hate me by telling them i am homosexual and agnostic ,or just tell them it's not their fault ,and then ask someone from the forum to wait for my email and post it in my social media account after some days of cbt ...
so tell me what do you think , and what's a better way if you had it in mind

 

[catman]

perhaps a short letter, short and sweet and nothing for them to be able to read into. im not sure if im going to leave anything at all. maybe itll leave less of an impression of my passing, and they can be forced to move on

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Been wrestling with this for a long time myself. However, my situation is unusual. Been suicidal for decades, so, people are just used to it from me. Do they want me to do it? Fuck no. Do they know it's a great possibility no matter what they say or do to intervene? Yep. Probably surprised I haven't yet. Little do they know....

That all said, it's impossible to predict how something like that will impact someone. It's a very subjective and very personal feeling to each and every human being. As one such human being who has had several friends ctb, its a strangely mixed emotional soup for me. Depends on which person we are talking about. I miss each of them terribly and a few I am still stunned and left wondering "Why?????" But, as they say, life moves on.

I still think about those people. Especially moreso now that I am pretty sure I am at peace with going soon. I hate thinking of how it will impact others, but, living for the sake of "not making people sad" is just not enough reason for me. Call me selfish but I don't want to get progressively worse just so people can give me encouragement and nothing else and claim the high road afterwards. Please....

In summary, no matter how you look at it, it's going to impact those around you pretty hard. If it gives you comfort to carefully lay out things in detail, do as such. Your peace of mind is one of the most important factors in this decision because it is the ultimate decision.

All that said, I wish you good fortune, success and peace of mind in whatever journey you choose to embark upon.

 

[Smart No More]

I agree short and sweet. Like, 'I was suffering so much and there was no possible way anybody could fix my issue so I chose to end it. I didn't want to leave my loved ones and I hope they will rwmwmber the good times and celebrate me rather than mourn me. I love you all. It' s unfortunate but life is like that and we have to accept what we're given. Please be happy that my suffering has ended and pour your love for me into those around you and the world you inhabit so I can live on through/with you.'


Truthfully I will find it hard to keep it that simple and short but I do think that about right.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Just say what your heart tells you. Fuck your mind, fuck grammar and fuck structure. These are your final words. You want them to be as pure and honest as can be.

 

[WrongPlaceWrongTime]

My plan to minimize the impact on my family is to gradually reduce interaction with them. Creating some distance from them will hopefully allow them to move on.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

My plan to minimize the impact on my family is to gradually reduce interaction with them. Creating some distance from them will hopefully allow them to move on.

What I am hoping too. Just worried about the reverse effect. "Why didn't he reach out to us?" Or "Why didn't I reach out to him?" That's very much possible considering human nature and guilt. Especially over a death.

 

[Pure]

You can't control other people's emotions. People are always gonna take suicides of people in their lives as personal even if it's irrational most of time.

 

[deathisnear]

I am in the same position. I've stayed alive for years and years even though I've wanted to go because I don't want to hurt a handful of people I know will be devastated when I ctb. I want to express the same things, it truly has nothing to do with them, there is nothing they have done to contribute to me wanting this and nothing they could do to stop me. I simply want them to respect my decision so I can have my peace. I struggle with writing the letter, I think of it in my mind and it turns into a book everything I want to say. I just want to bring them comfort somehow. I'm going to have to figure it out soon though, I plan to ctb very soon. You're not alone.

 

[FuneralCry]

The way I see it, by that point I will no longer be existing so it is not my concern how others feel. I also feel like there is not much you can do, if you have close family members they would be devastated but in my case, I would never stay alive for others and we have the right to exit this world at a time of our choosing, it would be selfish for others to expect us to suffer for decades.

I think in my case, the only thing that could help is writing a note which states 'there is nothing you could have done' and 'now I am at peace'. This may give them some closure.