how to go about it with a friend who is already grieving

[owarikigan]

my friend of 6 years might be all i have soon i fear. they lost their mother to cancer last year which was painful, and ever since then every day has been busy and stressful for them so i really try to make them happy and laugh even during my most traumatic moments so they don't know the extent to my illness.
i love them so dearly i wouldn't wish to end off on saying "bye im offing myself" or something. i know it's traumatic no matter what i do. i know they would miss me and it would add onto their baggage even more but i wish it were easier to explain that i feel as if it's best to not exist in constant pain anymore. or even if i did talk about my suicidal feelings, how do i go about it? is it better to not at all?
i don't think they know the extent to my suffering because i'd hate to put it on someone who is grieving but i feel like i've exhausted everyone else of their presence or reassurance and don't have much left to save me in general. being suicidal became a tiring everyday facet of me and drove so many away. i dont want it to drive away my last friend but i'm just so torn

 

[DoublePepperoni]

Are you their only friend or do they have other people to fall back on? You could probably distance yourself so they think you just fell out with them, and it wouldn't burden them extra.