Sigh_Sigh_Sigh

Sigh_Sigh_Sigh

Member
Mar 9, 2023
69
I'm thinking about CTB'ing around 80% of the time I'm awake.
 
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MadAna

MadAna

Member
May 8, 2023
29
more or less every day since i was 8... i think people should accept these thoughts. who tf in their right mind would like a relative or a friend to stay in this world just because other way theyll be sad. its egoistic. dont they think about the other person being "sad" and living a miserabe life? "better THEY being sad that me", i guess these are their thoughts...
 
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ppoyyx

ppoyyx

Life goes on but mine not lol
May 9, 2023
18
Mmh i would say minimum once every 3 days usually, but i mostly do it without even realising it. Those past week i've been doing cbt in all my dreams every nights tho
 
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SpiderLink

SpiderLink

they/them
Apr 3, 2023
361
I'm thinking about CTB'ing around 80% of the time I'm awake.
Everyday, I don't keep track but it's quite a lot. Especially when I'm in a bad state, those suicidal thoughts go off the roof
 
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StolenLife

StolenLife

Warlock
Sep 19, 2022
740
Every damn day.
 
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GasMonkey

GasMonkey

Nitrogen Master Race
May 15, 2022
1,881
24/7
 
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silent star

silent star

Soon I will forget this life
Apr 30, 2023
95
Everyday, 90% of the time it's the first thing I think of in the morning. I honestly don't think it ever leaves my thoughts
 
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iLikeFrogs

iLikeFrogs

Most likely dissociating
May 5, 2023
98
For the most of the time when I'm awake. It just haunts me
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,890
All the time, to me it feels like the logical response to having awareness that existing is nothing more than an unnecessary harm. Existing certainly is something so dreadful and unappealing to me, the fact that continuing to exist means to risk ending up in a situation of even worse suffering at any moment means that suicide will always be self care to me. This world is hell and we are only destined to suffer and lose everything so of course I'm always wishing to not exist, I see no value in delaying the inevitable. Suicide solves all problems, I see so much beauty in the thought of eternal nothingness where this existence won't even be a distant memory.
 
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SilentSadness

SilentSadness

The rain pours eternally.
Feb 28, 2023
1,125
Whenever I don't have more pressing problems to deal with, after all even thinking about suicide is a luxury in this world.
 
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Unknown21

Unknown21

The past never dies.
Apr 25, 2023
985
all the time.
 
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TAW122

TAW122

Emissary of the right to die.
Aug 30, 2018
6,872
Almost all the time, and more so whenever I run into inconvenience and difficulties. I oftenly think that "Damn if only voluntary euthanasia was legal or accessible..." and "fuck those pro-life bastards keeping us alive" or something along those lines...
 
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O

outrider567

Visionary
Apr 5, 2022
2,591
All The Time
 
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gardenofaphrodite

gardenofaphrodite

Can’t catch a break no matter what I do.
Apr 12, 2023
142
I've always had bouts of suicidal ideation & just general thoughts of being/wanting to be dead. Lately though it's every moment of every day all day. All I can think about is giving up & ctbing. I'm just so drained & tired of trying to fix my life, because every step I take, shit manages to get worse somehow.
 
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Lamentice

Lamentice

Sayonara
Mar 27, 2023
51
Every day & every part of the day.
 
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A

Already Gone now

Member
Oct 15, 2022
80
I've always had bouts of suicidal ideation & just general thoughts of being/wanting to be dead. Lately though it's every moment of every day all day. All I can think about is giving up & ctbing. I'm just so drained & tired of trying to fix my life, because every step I take, shit manages to get worse somehow.
I can associate/feel this way most of the time
 
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Das Nichts

Das Nichts

Dead Man Walking
Apr 8, 2023
521
Since I'm approaching my window multiple times a day.
 
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unnormal9

unnormal9

SOLDIER T.
Apr 12, 2023
1,139
Obviously every goddamn day for the past decade now.
 
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nightshade00

nightshade00

living just for dying
Jan 24, 2023
86
Not 24/7, but definitely every day. Even on the 'good' days.
 
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rorowanttogetout👍🏽

rorowanttogetout👍🏽

Member
Mar 27, 2023
18
Every single day the soon i open my eyes
 
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UsagiDrop

UsagiDrop

“What a beautiful day to haunt the earth.”
Apr 27, 2023
299
At least twice a day. Once for sure when I wake up, and then a million times over when I go to this job I'm starting to despise. Even right now I've been laying in bed for like the past four hours just thinking about ctb because I have to go to work in the next two. 😅 Thankfully it's not 24/7 at the moment but I think I'm reaching that point again.
 
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A

AutoTap

Elementalist
Nov 11, 2020
886
Whenever my I relapse and my anxiety gets worse then normal. Sometimes just randomly. Anxiety fuxking sucks.
 
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cherrysquick

cherrysquick

sh addict
May 6, 2023
55
at least once a day, on bad days i spend most of my time daydreaming about how and when i'm gonna do it. lately i've been thinking about it during very nice moments too, ex. "this is the last time i'll see x before i cbt" "i hope my friends remember this moment after i'm gone" etc etc
 
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The_End_Is_Comfort

The_End_Is_Comfort

Oh to be a goofy cartoon character.
May 7, 2023
225
85% of the time. When I'm not I'm usually either focused at work or distracted with some dumb shit I'm watching or doing.
 
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murmur

murmur

cage
Dec 11, 2022
130
nearly every one of my thoughts either begins or concludes with me desiring the existing and future pains to stop, I barely find solace in the fact that I may have some moments of relief from this relentless array of unwanted consequences being alive, I think it all comes off as indifference rather than suffering like someone might think of a person constantly wanting to die, I find it hard to take my own nuances seriously, and if I do, I laugh at myself with frustration like I'm being retarded humoring this need that needn't be, godammit I hate being a thing with the ability to construct any fucking thoughts at all, can I switch places with a jellyfish pleeaase
 
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laylaN

laylaN

Member
Apr 4, 2023
21
i try not to think about it much to be honest, i'm paranoid that i'll accidentally let something slip. it's usually the only thing on my mind when i'm alone, though, even on good days. one of my friends has also taken to saying "i'm gonna kms" as a shorthand for "something mildly inconvenient happened to me" which sets my suicidal thoughts off too (and it's annoying as hell)
 
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G

ghost44

Student
Apr 14, 2023
103
every day...all the time.
 
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LostinCyberspace

LostinCyberspace

Member
May 9, 2023
86
My adrenaline rushes and I feel tempted whenever something stressful comes up. I also think about it a lot before I go to sleep. I think it would be nice to just go to bed one night and never wake up.
 
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YandereMikuMistress

YandereMikuMistress

you say falling victim to myself is weak, so be it
Apr 26, 2023
527
My adrenaline rushes and I feel tempted whenever something stressful comes up. I also think about it a lot before I go to sleep. I think it would be nice to just go to bed one night and never wake up.
Agreed.
 
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