Definitely been there. It would have been a blessing at the peak of the onset of my illness. It's a hopeless and desperate feeling. I've started doing a little better lately. Not massively but any improvement is welcome. However having been sedentary for nearly two years and eating poorly, my heart has started feeling like it's under considerable strain. I may end up going that way. A very short walk took my breath away earlier. Last night I tried some press ups because my chest really felt bad. Couldn't even do ten. It's been coming on the last few days but I kind of suspected it might happen a while back. I'm not sure if I should try to turn it around or go with it. Having felt some improvements in my other health issues has me kind of wanting to grasp at some hope but in the back of my mind I don't really believe there's any turning around the other issues significant in my desire for ctb. Do I fight for a maybe? I kind of feel I must. It would be quite convenient to let my health deteriorate and take ending things out of my hands though. A relative of mine had a heart attack and was gone just like that. They say it would have been so fast they didn't feel it. Not sure if I believe that but it would be nice. I just hope, if it happens to me, I don't end up leaving the poor cat starved before I'm found.