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IAmSam

IAmSam

Student
Apr 13, 2020
197
How much did you take when you OD'd?
Oh goodness-100+ partial! Did you not pass out quickly enough?

30-34 of 1gram paracetamol
1 x. 30 loramet + 10 dominal forte + alcohol
1 x. 60 xanax + 60 diazepam + 30 loramet

never passed out
But next time Will be my last attempt using SN
 
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Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

2M Or Not 2B.
Oct 30, 2019
25,158
4 or 5 attempts, my next one is going to be guaranteed.
 
IAmSam

IAmSam

Student
Apr 13, 2020
197
care to share more on helium bag experience?

I was totally relaxed. And the gas was flowing in the bag. I almost fanted but just seconds before that i felt the urge to go to the bathroom. When i was there i was already to late. Lol. The gas was a Tiny bit smelly and Goes right to your head. I never tried that again
 
beyond_aquila_rift

beyond_aquila_rift

Student
May 11, 2020
103
did you back out because you thought it wasn't working? Or because you changed your mind? I mean I don't really care if I shit myself as long as I ctb. No judgment of course just curious as I don't know a lot about this method
I was totally relaxed. And the gas was flowing in the bag. I almost fanted but just seconds before that i felt the urge to go to the bathroom. When i was there i was already to late. Lol. The gas was a Tiny bit smelly and Goes right to your head. I never tried that again
 
IAmSam

IAmSam

Student
Apr 13, 2020
197
did you back out because you thought it wasn't working? Or because you changed your mind? I mean I don't really care if I shit myself as long as I ctb. No judgment of course just curious as I don't know a lot about this method
I didn't changed my mind. And at that point i didn't know i shitted my pants. Just felt the urge to go
 
beyond_aquila_rift

beyond_aquila_rift

Student
May 11, 2020
103
Oh ok thanks for the info

*hugs*

I didn't changed my mind. And at that point i didn't know i shitted my pants. Just felt the urge to go
 
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LastRide

LastRide

Specialist
Jan 23, 2020
369
2 real attempts - one benzos (yes, not I know they are useless, but it was in the days before internet and where would you get that info?), one partial. Lost consciousness while hanging quite comfortably, actually a really good experience...but then I must have started thrashing around since I woke up when the door came off and hit me on the head ! And of course a lot, a real great lot of bringing myself into dangerous situations to see whether I'd die or not...well obviously I didn't. Cannot believe I survived all that shit !
 
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Lost_the_will2_live

Lost_the_will2_live

11:11
Feb 25, 2020
125
I think any more then 5, then something clearly isn't working, and that person needs to really sit and look at whats going on. Doesn't mean you're not destined to die, more of a case of you are doing something very wrong. And maybe need to take a break and relook at your options

I have had 2 serious attempts, then an overdose just because I wanted to sleep for a long time, (but not to CTB) ripped into my arms in the hope of serious harm, but again not to CTB.
This was my most Serious Path

Wow read that blog and you are so brave to post that and write every inch of pain you felt in that time! Hope your okay and thank goodness for your brother , our loved ones can over ride our emotions sometimes! 8 hours is so long but I bet it didn't feel like that to you....! Selfish that someone sent you a message saying you wasted resources, you always get one idiot that hasn't had any experience with mental health! Sorry you had to experience them!!!
 
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disconnection

disconnection

It's the blue hour again
Apr 24, 2020
312
Two but neither were hugely likely to succeed I realise now. Paracetamol overdose / cutting my neck. My excuse - I was young. Third time's a charm!

Edit: Plus I've tried to get partial to work numerous times but just can't manage it! Have also drunk more than 6l of water in less than 2 hours twice, no effects. These I see more like experimentation tho.
 
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Lost_the_will2_live

Lost_the_will2_live

11:11
Feb 25, 2020
125
3.....

first one was when I had my breakdown with depression. Had a fight with my mum and ran out the house in my pyjamas and bare feet, just ran and ran and ran can't remember much but I climbed into an electricity sub station and tried to electrocute myself. Just remember the police dogs barking in my face and I was scared as hell! Then I was in hospital for a night as a place of safety. If I had refused I was getting sectioned.

second was partial hanging with one of my dogs leads , no idea why my dad knew to look along that beach for me but he did and he saved me probably because the marks around my neck were deep.

third was partial hanging again with the cord from my dressing gown on the back of my bathroom door but my then boyfriend came in and I stopped. Not sure about that night either because all three attempts were when I was in denial about being unwell. Just accepted my depression and anxiety in the last year or so and tried to get better. ( not going great as I have my SN ready for when I decide to ctb next time!)
 
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BitterlyAlive

BitterlyAlive

---
Apr 8, 2020
1,634
Sorry for asking, but does an aborted attempt count? I can't remember if I've asked this already or not.

As in, you're attempting to kill yourself but stop right before you cause any true damage. :/
 
NightmareTour

NightmareTour

Specialist
May 13, 2020
398
6. I am exceedingly terrible at dying, apparently. Just like everything else.
 
S

Sartigan

Member
May 22, 2020
13
I walked near a subway station with the intention to put myself infront of the train 2 times, didn't gather enough courage yet.
 
Quinlor

Quinlor

The stranger
Feb 21, 2019
1,065
Cyanide poisoning - one time

Hanging - many times and one serious attempt

SN - micro doses many times

Night Night - twice
 
Deleted member 10475

Deleted member 10475

Tired.
Sep 11, 2019
87
Just three times so far. I tried hanging when I was 11 but my mom found me, then I od'd twice last year.
 
Green Destiny

Green Destiny

Life isn't worth the trouble.
Nov 16, 2019
878
Don't possess the means for a proper attempt so none thus far.
 
Tintypographer

Tintypographer

I am done as of 4-21-2023. Somewhere I am no more
Apr 29, 2020
470
I've made one. Unsuccessfully obviously.
 
Puppy

Puppy

F Up
Apr 9, 2020
46
I don't know how many exactly because there were many times that they were impulsive attempts. As for planned out attempts I think 3/4 times. I have such bad memory, it's kinda sad I can't even clearly remember how many times I've tried to end my life lol
 
ghostgirl1995

ghostgirl1995

Experienced
Apr 18, 2020
237
Probably like 20 attempts most impulsive. It gets frustrating after awhile :(
 
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ssaaahmo

ssaaahmo

Experienced
May 18, 2020
219
Sorry for asking, but does an aborted attempt count? I can't remember if I've asked this already or not.

As in, you're attempting to kill yourself but stop right before you cause any true damage. :/
I would count that as an attempt
 
Blowba

Blowba

A Girl on the Shore
Aug 12, 2018
76
The amount of times I made was 2 but no one really knows a out the first time I tried since I kept that in secret besides my therapist
 
GoBack

GoBack

Paragon
Apr 25, 2020
997
Countless impulsive attempts, not v good at planning this. Mainly overdoses of painkillers and/ benzo
 
niloc

niloc

Relax — This won't hurt
May 6, 2020
68
Within the last few months, I would have to say I've had 5 real level attempts. This is where I'm in position and ready to go, just simply can't. Thinking back on these times I just don't know what stopped me - not a real survival instinct, but,.. who knows.. I just felt nothing and sat for several minutes until I just moved on.

I know ultimately that gunshot will be the way I go.. I just have to get over that last hurdle and manage to pull the trigger. Maybe I am a coward or somehow in my mind I'm thinking "i'm not really that bad off" - nothing more than the shame or walking or driving home from an failed attempt.
 
ugly_loser2008

ugly_loser2008

Member
Jul 30, 2018
73
2 attempts for me.

1 full hang at 15
1 partial about two years ago
Several practice parial lately
 

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