How long have you been suicidal for

[violetdevil]

About 9-10 years for me

 

[Seered Doom]

9 years, almost 10

 

[jinx <3]

probably about 8 years, maybe fewer

 

[dumblosergirl]

I have been thinking about suicide since I was 11 and now I'm 23. It seems as the years pass, it gets more intense.

 

[movinout17]

8 years for me

 

[Kundalini Guy]

Since covid times

 

[madge1]

I don't remember a time that I wasn't sucidal it's apart of who I am

 

[Turkish_Rose]

I've been suicidal for 8 years now. I've reached the crossroads point, I think, where either I will go through with it soon, or not at all.

 

[Life_and_Death]

10yrs

 

[Hollowman]

Off and on for 37 years.

 

[Neogoloid]

Since I was 13 years old, I'm 19 now.

 

[Oathkeeper]

Passively? 14 years.

Actively? Probably 3-4 years spread among those 14.

 

[DearMe]

It's been almost a decade.

 

[keyakizaka]

if you're talking consistently suicidal i'd say since 2020 so about 4 years.

 

[sweetgirl666]

definitely 6 or 7 years

 

[AshClouds]

Nearly all my life starting since middle school. It was more passive at first. Lately I started to feel like I should've done it back then. It would've saved me years of disappointment, and anguish, and I wouldn't be experiencing the pain I feel right now.

 

[DeadManLiving]

3 years actively and with increasing intensity.

How would you describe the relationship between the time you've had suicidal thoughts and the intensity of those thoughts / intent over time?

From ambivalent to concrete intent, with mixed periods of regression? Or more as a coping mechanism, comforted by the thought that the option is there?

Or has your intensity and intent both increased steadily / exponentially drawn over time as in you've committed to the decision of leaving voluntarily, more strongly each year gone by?

 

[Arcitect]

Honestly, since 7th grade. Maybe since I was around 12 years old. Now I'm 18. Its been about 6ish years passively and a few months actively. I've been suicidal for so long that it just feels engrained in my character.

 

[KillerIsMe]

Only seriously for about 4 months, fantasized about it for 6 years but until fairly recently was determiend to do it for my parents.

 

[loopdaloop]

5 years

 

[VioletNebula]

Passively for 20 years, actively suicidal off and on for that period. Its gotten real bad the last 6 years or so..

 

[sukuna]

ever since middle school so 6th or 7th grade or 12/13 years old, now a highschool senior/18

 

[FlyAwayHoney]

I think I first experienced wanting to die around the age of 11. I'm in my 20s now and the feeling has never really gone away. I have ups and downs and phases where it's more of a backdrop in my thoughts opposed to the forefront of my mind all the time, but the notion is always there.

Each year on my birthday I kind of can't believe I'm still around. I always thought I would be dead before I turned 20.

 

[DyingToDie123]

I have diary entries from when I was 5 about wanting to die, but don't remember much about it. I think I've been passively suicidal forever but actively it's been 11 years.

 

[jackrussell]

ever since i was forced to withdrawal from ativan and that was 4 years ago.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Depending on circumstances passively for about 5 years, on and off.
Actively with my method ready to go, now 1/2 year, almost all the time.

 

[theblackdahlia8]

About 2 years and have been suffering from Major Depressive Disorder about the same time. I have had some serious and traumatic life events that have just pushed me over the edge.

 

[LainCry]

In total, 17 years. Most people don't believe me when I tell them how young I was when it started.

 

[BLEH:3]

a good 14-15 years, I have diary's of 6 year old me being a sad little boy lmao

 

[BlackMoon]

Since 10-11 years. I had a "pause" of a year during my first relationship but it became toxic after.