Discussion How has loosing an SS friend to CTB affected you?

[Kdawg2018]

So I recently lost some SS friends to CTB, R.I.P., and it has affected me more than I thought it would. I mean we all support each other and we are on a site that is dedicated to being pro-choice, but how do you deal with loosing the only people who understand you or can relate to you?

I wish this thread to be about who you lost, if you want to share that, how close you were, or how this person affected your life. HUGZ!

 

[ParamitePie]

Thankfully, I haven't lost any friends from SS, as I'm not an active member of the community. I have, however, lost a friend to suicide and it caused psychological torment which has lasted until this day.

 

[JustAboutDone]

@Kdawg2018 hugs for you xx

 

[deflagrat]

I still remember Malice. He ctbed with N.

 

[throwaway_2620]

@Pulmonicis ctb with SN. I was there with him by his side (on his thread, "tonight is the flight") as he drank 14g SN dissolved in 60ml water. I was there with him from the moment he drank the solution, up until he posted his final post about 24 minutes in and (presumably) lost consciousness about 25 minutes or so in.

 

[furax53]

I lost a person from SS with whom I got along well and it shocked me

 

[StillWaiting]

To be honest, I haven't really made a friend but there are couple of people names I still have seen too often and remember them

 

[Kdawg2018]

I lost a person from SS with whom I got along well and it shocked me

Well I am not the only one then

 

[furax53]

Well I am not the only one then

what was it for you? because for me I forgot his nickname it was the Italian woman of 53 years it is ctb with live with sn

 

[15dec]

I've been thinking of @Paulsmith a lot, he was last active a couple minutes after I messaged him and it's been on my mind that he could've read my message right before he ctb... I wish I'd said something better to him if he did successfully ctb. I hope he's found his peace but I guess I wish he'd been able to recover and stay with us.

 

[JustAboutDone]

With people like @Pulmonicis it is difficult to know if it's been confirmed, there are times where people come round or are found and taken to hospital. It leaves you feeling in mid-air.

 

[JustAboutDone]

Well I am not the only one then

No, you are definitely not the only one xx it is painful. One can be pro-choice and be glad a tormented soul has found their peace but still grieve them and miss them because they were your friend and you made a connection

 

[throwaway_2620]

With people like @Pulmonicis it is difficult to know if it's been confirmed, there are times where people come round or are found and taken to hospital. It leaves you feeling in mid-air.

I agree! However, I hope he found the peace he was looking for.

 

[HelensNepenthe]

I haven't made any solid friends with anyone. Only joined a week ago today. Eren and I briefly talked though recently.

 

[Eren]

I have not lost friends in SS, I think it must be very hard, and I think it would be very hard for me to feel very good with someone in SS and lose it.

 

[Sinbad]

It's tough...one day you talk to them normally and the next day they are gone forever.. I find it upsetting.. When I joined SS I started to seek as many new connections as possible. I am paying the price for it lately.
Now, I promised myself not to get involved too much on SS and to not form new connections until the day I ctb.

 

[Eren]

It's tough...one day you talk to them normally and the next day they are gone forever.. I find it upsetting.. When I joined SS I started to seek as many new connections as possible. I am pay the price for it lately.
Now, I promised myself not to get involved too much on SS and to not form new connections until the day I ctb.

completely agree

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

I really liked Burning Lights and I did have a private moment to myself after the news of his passing. I'm having trouble remembering any other members I knew who ctb'ed off the top of my head. Very often those who make attempts and elaborate goodbye threads show up again a month later. That can feel like a bit of a mindfuck even if it's not intentional.

 

[JustAboutDone]

@Sinbad i like your honesty X

 

[JustAboutDone]

I really liked Burning Lights and I did have a private moment to myself after the news of his passing. I'm having trouble remembering any other members I knew who ctb'ed off the top of my head. Very often those who make attempts and elaborate goodbye threads show up again a month later. That can feel like a bit of a mindfuck even if it's not intentional.

I felt sad for those who grieved for Morning Angel :-( It's a lot to take on board when that sort of thing happens

 

[wxtyubidi7y]

I was friendly with someone who hasn't been seen on the site since new years day. I hope he is ok, although because each of us is here because of ctb, it's hard to know what outcome to wish for one another.

 

[Smilla]

I lost a friend from the old SS on reddit last year. We spoke on the phone a few times, and texted daily for months.

He had a gun but decided to get N which he did, and within about a month after receiving it he passed away, his ex gf by his side.

I was happy for him, he was a tormented soul who found the peace he couldn't in this life.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

I felt sad for those who grieved for Morning Angel :-( It's a lot to take on board when that sort of thing happens

Instead of a formal goodbye I tend to think it's best to state that you are going to make an attempt, and if it doesn't pan out, to just let us know briefly. There's no shame in that whatsoever. Some might say "well that's none of our business" and I can understand that viewpoint too. But a lot of members don't have much going on in their lives and grow attached to others here, even if only by way of familiarity etc. Some members certainly underestimate the compassion floating around SS, or may feel it's disingenuous. But I don't get that impression at all.

 

[Deleted member 4993]

I have lost quite a few friends from other groups other the years who ctb, it comes as a shock but I respect their wishes
It's hard to not get emotionally involved if you correspond and get to know people.
I always envisage a soul behind every profile all here for their own reason.

 

[Jupiter]

Thank you @Kdawg2018 for that thread. I can totally relate.

 

[Jiva]

Hugs for all lost friends. I hope i will follow you.

 

[throwaway_2620]

Apparently (according to his profile), @Pulmonicis was last seen just hours ago. I wonder how he failed to ctb. My guess is that either his survival instinct took over or he was found and taken to hospital.

 

[JustAboutDone]

Apparently (according to his profile), @Pulmonicis was last seen just hours ago. I wonder how he failed to ctb. My guess is that either his survival instinct took over or he was found and taken to hospital.

Hopefully he or she will come forward to offer the many people that wished them well some sort of story as a lot of people were concerned.

 

[JustAboutDone]

RIP Mexican Travels a fine young man with integrity and talent

 

[stellabelle]

I should've told you when you were alive @SiArc , I still love you to this day and miss you quite dearly