Discussion How do you feel about school/work?

[kitia973]

How do you feel about your school/work? Do you think it's fulfilling?

I don't go to the best school, but sometimes it's the only place to connect with new people in real life.

 

[Greyhawk]

I found it really fulfilling during high school because I made a lot of new friends and got good grades once I started putting in some work. And not just because of grades, I was genuinely interested in psychology, biology, math and some topics in history but then bipolar kind of happened.

 

[Namelesa]

School has been one of the worst experiences in my life and has destroyed tolerance for mental pain. it was boring, stressful and torturous with having to deal with the large amount of work everyday. I was so scared of having to go there and not getting a teacher angry or disappointed in me. It didn't fulfill anything in me, I just wanted it to end and stay safe at home forever at the time.

College was better in I got to do work I was interested in (being game development) which made it much easier for my autistic brain to handle but I would have rather not gone through it as I didn't learn much from as I was already skilled in the work we did and just wanted to use that skill on my own at home. I was able to get through it until I got in a relationship there which ended quite shortly and broke me as I never even had a proper friend until then. I dropped out on the second year.

I now feel empty with most things I do now. I know I wouldn't be able to handle any sort of work cus of how mentally weak I am. I try to develop more on the games I am making but I work on it too much to fill the void and that ends up back firing on me as I burn out. I feel broken and pathetic compared to how most humans can handle work. Thankful my parents are fine with me being not able to get a job (but I kinda wish they did so they are annoyed with me and kick me out so I can ctb as now I am trapped home by them.)

 

[kitia973]

I found it really fulfilling during high school because I made a lot of new friends and got good grades once I started putting in some work. And not just because of grades, I was genuinely interested in psychology, biology, math and some topics in history but then bipolar kind of happened.

I'm glad to her that you had fun with your studies! Getting good grades can be rewarding when you feel like you're enjoying the material. My school doesn't really offer advanced material in their courses. I was geniunely interested in human anatomy and vivisection, but my bio class never discusses anything beyond the syllabus and we had to spend 6 hours of homework a week on photosynthesis. I never got why would my school made us complete a ridiculous amount of repetitive work over the simplest process. Made me hate plants to this day.

School has been one of the worst experiences in my life and has destroyed tolerance for mental pain. it was boring, stressful and torturous with having to deal with the large amount of work everyday. I was so scared of having to go there and not getting a teacher angry or disappointed in me. It didn't fulfill anything in me, I just wanted it to end and stay safe at home forever at the time.

College was better in I got to do work I was interested in (being game development) which made it much easier for my autistic brain to handle but I would have rather not gone through it as I didn't learn much from as I was already skilled in the work we did and just wanted to use that skill on my own at home. I was able to get through it until I got in a relationship there which ended quite shortly and broke me as I never even had a proper friend until then. I dropped out on the second year.

I now feel empty with most things I do now. I know I wouldn't be able to handle any sort of work cus of how mentally weak I am. I try to develop more on the games I am making but I work on it too much to fill the void and that ends up back firing on me as I burn out. I feel broken and pathetic compared to how most humans can handle work. Thankful my parents are fine with me being not able to get a job (but I kinda wish they did so they are annoyed with me and kick me out so I can ctb as now I am trapped home by them.)

I can agree, honestly. Most of the stuff taught in high school was completely useless. No one would need to memorize Shakespearean poetry or solve trigonometric equations in their daily lives, or even in their career, depending what they do. Also ridiculous on how they assign a ridiculous amount of work, so that we would pour our time and energy into something that would never be used in later life.

 

[InversedShadow]

Im proud I was able to get into my current school, however Im dissapointed in the end by how little practical field work we got, way too much theory..

For socializing with others, well, I definietly thought it would be better, in the end I only talk more or less comfortably to like 2 classmates but they dont talk to me about anything else than school things.
Reaching out to new friends or smth has become a real issue in college, it was hard before but now somehow the barrier became thicker, from time to time I can pick up random convos and I can even say a word what is nice, but not more than that.. maybe I will get better one day!

 

[TheHolySword]

weirdly, i love my job. i could see myself doing this for the rest of my life (well i guess that's still true). but i hate my life and my existence, i have no energy to be a real person. i go in every day and dissociate and then go home. if i were another person, a happier person, going in to work wouldn't be so bad. i don't hate my job, i just hate being alive.

 

[LostLily]

I used to be good at school until anxiety and self doubt got the best of me. That followed me in my work life

 

[yousaidimsweet]

i love school! it didn't always used to be that way because i wasn't the best student so i felt inferior to my peers, but once i started to develop good study habits and feel excited/passionate about my studies then i started to find fulfillment in studying. i'm actually on my winter break rn and feel a bit useless because i don't have anything to do throughout my day. i will say though that it was rough starting to find the reason in me to like school but once i found it it was so worth it. if i could keep going back to college just to get multiple degrees i would lol

edit: oh also of course socializing is a big plus for me, though it gets overwhelming because i'm involved on my campus so i see too many people that i know daily lol

 

[ijustwishtodie]

It's pointless just like everything else in life. I never felt any fulfillment from studying even if I got extremely good grades because I had to do this against my will and I just didn't care about any of it. There isn't really anything in life that I voluntarily wanted to do aside from being non existent. All of this is just so pointless

 

[banger12]

It's weird. I hated high school and did very poorly so it's odd that when I did my second attempt at college that I loved it so much and found it to be so fulfilling. Granted both attempts were community college but still. Of course I was always aware that I didn't belong there and that I wasn't good enough to be what I really wanted to be but it didn't stop me from enjoying college in the moment. The only difficult part is that my fear of people had deepened since high school and that I was absolutely scared of everyone.

I loved college. But that was the old thing. My injury effectively ruined that for me.

I have a part time job family provided me to help pay for college initially. Despite the fact that I do really work hard at it and I'm told that I'm good at it I always feel insecure about it. Like I'm a nepo kid or some shit. And now that I can no longer do college it feels pointless. But I do it anyway to appease family and afford ctb.

As time goes on I realize I'm a failure of a person and the one out I had (school) is gone.

 

[Kanashii]

I feel okay about work. I like doing my job and I like the people that I can interact with and talk to, but the thing that I don't like and the thing that sort of makes me hate going to work a lot of the time is the fact that the money that I spend so hard earning, ends up going to the government who give no help to me whatsoever. Tax that we pay on earnings, as well as local community taxes and various other ways that the government loves to steal your hard earn cash.

I like my work but I end up feeling like I hate it because so much of it goes to the very authorities that I hate because they just take everything from you, and give you nothing in return except suffering and hatred for them.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I got a lot out of uni. Work has been varied. Some jobs I've hated, some I've loved. Now though, I'm just tired really and, I don't want to do anything!