How do you feel about revenge?

[Roseate]

What's your thought on revenge? Hurting the people that hurt you? Is it crazy? I'm not talking about physical pain necessarily. More of a mental or emotional agony type of thing.

 

[Darkover]

It could backfire
"An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind." Think about the repercussions of your actions – you might end up in trouble for seeking revenge. You might even put yourself in harm's way.

What can really be gained? It is far better to save yourself from the possibility of further trauma. Focus on the good things in your life and look at how you can move forward, putting the person who hurt you firmly in the past.

 

[absolomonisgone]

do not revenge. never. ever.

 

[Roseate]

That is complete shit. I am so fucking sick of this fucking screwed up world.

 

[orca87]

Wouldn't work. You can only "cause" emotional pain in someone who cares about you. If they cared, then you wouldn't be hurt.

So, if you try to cause emotional distress in people that hurt you, they would only see you as pathetic and be even more convinced that they turned away from you.

In general, revenge is not a good idea, whether it works or not. The only revenge that could work and is acceptable is by getting better for yourself. Getting distant to those who have hurt you and living a better life without them. But that, then, would be better suited for the recovery subforum.

 

[Heavenbound]

Warning: post contains religious content.
Scroll away if this offends you...


I totally get what you're saying, and I've wanted to really see certain people squirm and suffer, but I now live by the words that say "Vengeance is Mine, sayeth the Lord. I will repay."
And life experience has taught me that He can do it SO much better than I could even imagine.
Just my 2 cents.

 

[FuneralCry]

As long as the way to get revenge isn't illegal (as that could lead to negative consequences), then I think that wanting to get revenge is perfectly understandable and justifiable, as people should be aware of how their actions cause harm, it's really disgusting how humans create so much suffering in this hellish and unfair world.

 

[Roseate]

Wouldn't work. You can only "cause" emotional pain in someone who cares about you. If they cared, then you wouldn't be hurt.

So, if you try to cause emotional distress in people that hurt you, they would only see you as pathetic and be even more convinced that they turned away from you.

In general, revenge is not a good idea, whether it works or not. The only revenge that could work and is acceptable is by getting better for yourself. Getting distant to those who have hurt you and living a better life without them. But that, then, would be better suited for the recovery subforum.

Or kill two birds with one stone. And make them feel guilt for the rest of their lives. That guilt will eat them alive and they will go down the same damn path. Remember the pain doesn't stop when you die, it just passes on.

Warning: post contains religious content.
Scroll away if this offends you...


I totally get what you're saying, and I've wanted to really see certain people squirm and suffer, but I now live by the words that say "Vengeance is Mine, sayeth the Lord. I will repay."
And life experience has taught me that He can do it SO much better than I could even imagine.
Just my 2 cents.

Fortunately for me I don't believe in the existence of god or satan or anything really. I believe in fairness but that's not possible in this fucked up world. This world should've been wiped years ago.

 

[enviro400mmc]

I believe in revenge on myself by ctb

 

[Roseate]

As long as the way to get revenge isn't illegal (as that could lead to negative consequences), then I think that wanting to get revenge is perfectly understandable and justifiable, as people should be aware of how their actions cause harm, it's really disgusting how humans create so much suffering in this hellish and unfair world.

Exactly! People keep saying moving on is the best revenge but it isn't. No one thinks about their actions unless you're dead or almost die or show them by doing the exact same to them. You moving on doesn't effect them because how are they going to know what they did was wrong? How are they going to feel it if they don't feel it themselves?

 

[orca87]

Or kill two birds with one stone. And make them feel guilt for the rest of their lives. That guilt will eat them alive and they will go down the same damn path. Remember the pain doesn't stop when you die, it just passes on.

You mean by ctb'ing?

Again, that won't work. The only people that would feel guilty are the ones that you wouldn't want to feel that way. Don't know about your situation, but there is probably at least one person that cares about you and would be in grief if you ctb'ed. This person will feel guilty.

The people that that have hurt you wouldn't. They would just go on with their lives and tell everyone that they once knew someone so pathetic that eventually, they ctb'ed.

Revenge doesn't work, can backfire, and doesn't make you feel any better. If it's not about feeling better for yourself, it's entirely pointless

 

[Roseate]

I believe in revenge on myself by ctb

Honestly great idea but in the process hurt them. Like I said earlier, kill two birds with one stone. And they will never forget it. Whenever they look in the mirror, they will know. They will have bloods on their hands. And if that's not poetic, I don't know what is. People treat others any kind of way and they never ever ever regret it or whatever. I mean come as a matter of fact we are all on this app depressed and suicidal and those of us that were bullied, I guarantee those bullies are living life HAPPY. While we are suffering. I'm not saying hurt them physically. I'm saying mentally break them. That's not a crime.

You mean by ctb'ing?

Again, that won't work. The only people that would feel guilty are the ones that you wouldn't want to feel that way. Don't know about your situation, but there is probably at least one person that cares about you and would be in grief if you ctb'ed. This person will feel guilty.

The people that that have hurt you wouldn't. They would just go on with their lives and tell everyone that they once knew someone so pathetic that eventually, they ctb'ed.

Revenge doesn't work, can backfire, and doesn't make you feel any better. If it's not about feeling better for yourself, it's entirely pointless

It works because everyone pretend to care once you die. It's the hypocrisy of this world. The ones that are your friend or family member are always the ones who hurt you. Revenge works. Just needs to be executed properly. Take away something they care for and they will definitely regret it. My choice of revenge is finding their insecurities and using every last one of them to make them feel like complete shit. They will act like it doesn't bother them but in those dark days where they are feeling low, those words will echo in their heads and that's good enough for me. They will never forget it because it was things they feared were true in the first place and me saying it somehow validates that.

 

[enviro400mmc]

Honestly great idea but in the process hurt them. Like I said earlier, kill two birds with one stone. And they will never forget it. Whenever they look in the mirror, they will know. They will have bloods on their hands. And if that's not poetic, I don't know what is. People treat others any kind of way and they never ever ever regret it or whatever. I mean come as a matter of fact we are all on this app depressed and suicidal and those of us that were bullied, I guarantee those bullies are living life HAPPY. While we are suffering. I'm not saying hurt them physically. I'm saying mentally break them. That's not a crime.

Nah it's not that, that's how I used to think but I realised that's just impulsive and pointless because they won't really care, you won't get to see it because you will be dead and you will do far more harm to people you absolutely do not want to hurt e.g. Family (last one might not be relevant to you).

But ultimately after years of confusion and contradictions I've come to realise that everything I've ever tried to blame on others is really my fault, and that's why I want to ctb to get revenge on myself.

 

[orca87]

Take away something they care for and they will definitely regret it.

What could you emotionally take away from them by ctb'ing?

I've come to realise that everything I've ever tried to blame on others is really my fault

I feel the same. It is a sure way to spiral down into deep depression. And people will say, keep calm, don't be too hard on yourself.

It's really a vicious cycle: The less you think of yourself, the more blame you take, and the less you accept that others may also have contributed to the miserable situation you find yourself in.
Then, you think even less of yourself. Rinse and repeat.

While I totally get this concept – I came to the same realisation as you – because I perceive my part in it much worse than anyone else's. It hurts — a lot.

 

[FacePALM]

Nah it's not that, that's how I used to think but I realised that's just impulsive and pointless because they won't really care, you won't get to see it because you will be dead and you will do far more harm to people you absolutely do not want to hurt e.g. Family (last one might not be relevant to you).

But ultimately after years of confusion and contradictions I've come to realise that everything I've ever tried to blame on others is really my fault, and that's why I want to ctb to get revenge on myself.

Why is it your fault? Just curious

 

[Holu]

RBAMN CLIQUE. REVENGE BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY.

Whatever negativity you wanna put out onto me expect tenfold the retaliation.

Got a lot of anger and a desire to see people hurt. Bully's, abusers, rapists, etc can all catch sum to their face

 

[RandomTuesday]

Like I said earlier, kill two birds with one stone. And they will never forget it. Whenever they look in the mirror, they will know. They will have bloods on their hands.

Do they hurt now, knowing that they hurt you? If so, they already hurt. If not, they still won't.

 

[SVEN]

For me, attempting revenge would be like drinking poison myself in the hope my enemy would die.

 

[Roseate]

Nah it's not that, that's how I used to think but I realised that's just impulsive and pointless because they won't really care, you won't get to see it because you will be dead and you will do far more harm to people you absolutely do not want to hurt e.g. Family (last one might not be relevant to you).

But ultimately after years of confusion and contradictions I've come to realise that everything I've ever tried to blame on others is really my fault, and that's why I want to ctb to get revenge on myself.

So it's my fault that other people mistreat me? Yeah you're right. I should've kept my walls up and I shouldn't have tried to be nice. And mentioning family doesn't change anything. The same family that wasn't there for my mental illness? My parents don't even know about all of my diagnosis. And I get called crazy for having a mental illness. And other times, it's just completely fucking ignored. People only care about what I can do for them and not what they can do for me. And that goes for everyone. Family or not. They are all the same. They only care if they can get some sort of sympathy from people. And I'm wasting my time here. Everyday I wake up, I get angrier. Plain simple I don't want to be one of those people that waits for it to get better, pour their all and are in their 40s or 50s struggling way more than they were in their 20s. It's been years. And it's more than the depression or mood swings or the suicidal thoughts, it's the people, the way the world works, the economy, the toxic air and etc. It all feels so suffocating. I want to be able to be the person that rise from this but the truth is I feel like it only goes down from here. Everytime I try, I get pushed down more. I am constantly being kicked when I am down. There is no up. I don't even know if up is me feeling better or if it's just the mood swings messing with me.

 

[orca87]

Got a lot of anger and a desire to see people hurt. Bully's, abusers, rapists, etc can all catch sum to their face

Abusers choose their victims because they seem to be an easy target. They couldn't care less about you as a person. So, then why would they care if you ctb'ed?

These people will see ctb as an indicator of weakness. It will even increase their feeling of superiority.

What happened to me was not abuse, but people turned away, which hurt. If I ctb'ed, it would just reaffirm that turning away was the best they could do. To me, it would be best if I knew they never find out about me catching the bus. The only way, I could get my revenge is by showing them that I am way better off without them, to make them question their choice to turn away. I failed in doing so, so my last option is ctb. But I know they wouldn't care at all.

Revenge sought from a position of weakness is just pathetic and ridiculous to them. Proper revenge comes from a position of strength. So, again the only way is to recover, let go, and living your best life without them. If you fail in recovering, that's "ok", you can choose ctb for you. But you must accept that the chance to "hurt them back" is gone then, too.

 

[Roseate]

What could you emotionally take away from them by ctb'ing?

I feel the same. It is a sure way to spiral down into deep depression. And people will say, keep calm, don't be too hard on yourself.

It's really a vicious cycle: The less you think of yourself, the more blame you take, and the less you accept that others may also have contributed to the miserable situation you find yourself in.
Then, you think even less of yourself. Rinse and repeat.

While I totally get this concept – I came to the same realisation as you – because I perceive my part in it much worse than anyone else's. It hurts — a lot.

They will blame themselves to the point where they will take on that pain. Also everyone have insecurities. Bullies succeed by finding those insecurities and using it against the victim. Truth is they will remember the bad things you said. They always do.

 

[orca87]

They will blame themselves to the point where they will take on that pain.

From my own experience (not with ctb, obviously), they won't.

 

[Holu]

Abusers choose their victims because they seem to be an easy target. They couldn't care less about you as a person. So, then why would they care if you ctb'ed?

These people will see ctb as an indicator of weakness. It will even increase their feeling of superiority.

What happened to me was not abuse, but people turned away, which hurt. If I ctb'ed, it would just reaffirm that turning away was the best they could do. To me, it would be best if I knew they never find out about me catching the bus. The only way, I could get my revenge is by showing them that I am way better off without them, to make them question their choice to turn away. I failed in doing so, so my last option is ctb. But I know they wouldn't care at all.

Revenge sought from a position of weakness is just pathetic and ridiculous to them. Proper revenge comes from a position of strength. So, again the only way is to recover, let go, and living your best life without them. If you fail in recovering, that's "ok", you can choose ctb for you. But you must accept that the chance to "hurt them back" is gone then, too.

Nah when I say sum to the face I'm not talking about me dyin I'm talkin bout them.
But ya I wholeheartedly agree. Ctbing isn't really a solid revenge strat

 

[Roseate]

Do they hurt now, knowing that they hurt you? If so, they already hurt. If not, they still won't.

People usually feel hurt when it's too late. And who knows? But they do now. Because I went in. I made sure I mentioned every single insecurities. Now whenever they are feeling depressed, they will remember how unlovable they are. They will feel the pain so intensely. And they will have no one to make them feel better because the one person that cared, they pushed away.

From my own experience (not with ctb, obviously), they won't.

From my experience they do.

 

[SpiderLink]

What's your thought on revenge? Hurting the people that hurt you? Is it crazy? I'm not talking about physical pain necessarily. More of a mental or emotional agony type of thing.

I'd never, I don't see the point of it. Because it hurts the person and yourself in the process. I'm too kind of a person to hurt anyone, no matter what, the last thing I'd want is someone getting hurt from my words or actions.

 

[Holu]

I'd never, I don't see the point of it. Because it hurts the person and yourself in the process. I'm too kind of a person to hurt anyone, no matter what, the last thing I'd want is someone getting hurt from my words or actions.

You too kind, me personally I want to see them screaming and pleading for their lives. Leave they ass on the street for their family to find

 

[Roseate]

I'd never, I don't see the point of it. Because it hurts the person and yourself in the process. I'm too kind of a person to hurt anyone, no matter what, the last thing I'd want is someone getting hurt from my words or actions.

When I'm hurt, I don't think. I hurt. I had to learn to use my words to hurt people and for most of my life, that was the only thing that worked. It hurts them more than it hurts me. Yes, I am putting myself out of character but I'm not emotionally or mentally where I need to be. I am tired of it yes but it's the only thing people react to. I can be nice and they try to gaslight me anyways. I can be nice and they ignore me. Nice never works for me. And honestly, I'm not nice. I used to be but somewhere along the road, I kind of lost it. I've been pretending, trying so hard to be nice but i always go back to that defense mechanism. Anger is my safe place. If I'm angry, I can't get hurt.

 

[Holu]

When I'm hurt, I don't think. I hurt. I had to learn to use my words to hurt people and for most of my life, that was the only thing that worked. It hurts them more than it hurts me. Yes, I am putting myself out of character but I'm not emotionally or mentally where I need to be. I am tired of it yes but it's the only thing people react to. I can be nice and they try to gaslight me anyways. I can be nice and they ignore me. Nice never works for me. And honestly, I'm not nice. I used to be but somewhere along the road, I kind of lost it. I've been pretending, trying so hard to be nice but i always go back to that defense mechanism. Anger is my safe place. If I'm angry, I can't get hurt.

Personal opinion but you can be kind, sympathetic, hell even empathetic as well as sadistic at the same time. Anger is a safe place for me too, and as much as I hate suffering or seeing others suffer(at least I think I do) part of me just wants to hurt people I dislike for the pleasure of seeing them in misery. In a weird way it's calming.

 

[enviro400mmc]

So it's my fault that other people mistreat me? Yeah you're right. I should've kept my walls up and I shouldn't have tried to be nice. And mentioning family doesn't change anything. The same family that wasn't there for my mental illness? My parents don't even know about all of my diagnosis. And I get called crazy for having a mental illness. And other times, it's just completely fucking ignored. People only care about what I can do for them and not what they can do for me. And that goes for everyone. Family or not. They are all the same. They only care if they can get some sort of sympathy from people. And I'm wasting my time here. Everyday I wake up, I get angrier. Plain simple I don't want to be one of those people that waits for it to get better, pour their all and are in their 40s or 50s struggling way more than they were in their 20s. It's been years. And it's more than the depression or mood swings or the suicidal thoughts, it's the people, the way the world works, the economy, the toxic air and etc. It all feels so suffocating. I want to be able to be the person that rise from this but the truth is I feel like it only goes down from here. Everytime I try, I get pushed down more. I am constantly being kicked when I am down. There is no up. I don't even know if up is me feeling better or if it's just the mood swings messing with me.

I'm really sorry I should have been WAY more careful with my wording. I was just talking about my personal experiences. Please don't copy my blame mindset, I would not wish my feelings about myself on my worst enemy. And yeah I did say that the family thing may not apply to you or other people. Again, I was just talking about my experiences.

Why is it your fault? Just curious

To weak, too emotionally unstable, have let minor things completely ruin my life, eventually got too disillusioned by the mental gymnastics of every trying to put any blame on other ppl and just realised it's my fault.

 

[SpiderLink]

You too kind, me personally I want to see them screaming and pleading for their lives. Leave they ass on the street for their family to find

Well I just think of it as I wouldn't want anyone to go through any amount of pain from my actions, because ultimately that will hurt me further than it already has. It will just add to my grave. I've been treated like shit for most of my life, I just don't want to be responsible for someone else's pain. I can understand revenge, it's just that will bring more pain into this world that has too much of it. We don't need to bully a bully, as much as I would love to stand up for myself, I just know I'm powerless. I wish everyone was kind, the world would be a pretty place.

When I'm hurt, I don't think. I hurt. I had to learn to use my words to hurt people and for most of my life, that was the only thing that worked. It hurts them more than it hurts me. Yes, I am putting myself out of character but I'm not emotionally or mentally where I need to be. I am tired of it yes but it's the only thing people react to. I can be nice and they try to gaslight me anyways. I can be nice and they ignore me. Nice never works for me. And honestly, I'm not nice. I used to be but somewhere along the road, I kind of lost it. I've been pretending, trying so hard to be nice but i always go back to that defense mechanism. Anger is my safe place. If I'm angry, I can't get hurt.

How does that make u feel tho? I'm really curious, do u feel good?