How do you develop self discipline?

[paredler]

After being forced in my childhood to do things I didn't want that caused me great dread, I ended up with a broken soul. I can no longer function. I'm always tired and in emotional pain. I suffer from anhedonia. Things I liked back in the day I no longer like now, even on weekends when I'm supposed to rest and relax, I CAN'T BECAUSE I suffer from depression and anxiety that cripple me. I feel like I worked 16 hours even though I didn't work it all today. Seeking for dopamine pleasure like food and masturbation helps a little but only a little. It's mostly suffering for me. My head always aches and I feel like I suffer from chronic muscle soreness.

 

[Sulyya]

Wish I knew. I suspect maybe a few things need to align. It's easier to be active and productive if you're in an okay mood, but to get into an okay mood you should be active. Seems hopeless but sometimes they both suddenly align and it's a good idea to make the most of those days.

 

[Akanea]

App that remind you to do stuff we're really helpful to me, and you increase the count each day: for example, brush your teeth, once done, increase the count and the streak on your phone, keep it up each day, until you don't even feel like it's a chore anymore, just natural.
Baby steps is the way, you will not go from crippling depression and stuck at home to a well adjusted person suddenly, you will not be able to support all those changes. Add things up one at a time, find someone here or somewhere else that can be your recovery partner

 

[damyon]

You don't need discipline if you don't have a goal. That would be step one.

Try the removal principle rather than the addition principle. For example, instead of deciding to meditate for 30 minutes a day, try cutting on dopamine pleasures (food or masturbation). Your brain will naturally pick something else to do, which can be more productive.

 

[paredler]

but to get into an okay mood you should be active

If I'm active against my will, it always leads to anxiety attacks and bursts of tears. It never works for me.

You don't need discipline if you don't have a goal. That would be step one.

Try the removal principle rather than the addition principle. For example, instead of deciding to meditate for 30 minutes a day, try cutting on dopamine pleasures (food or masturbation). Your brain will naturally pick something else to do, which can be more productive.

I tried to cut sugar and worked for three months, now I'm addicted again. I never get used to not having sugar in my life, it's like an unstoppable force.

 

[LaughingGoat]

I spent and continue to spend a lot of my time working on self-discipline. For me in practice, it really comes down to constant awareness. For instance, anger and hatred were a big hurdle for me to overcome especially when I was young. It took a lot of time analyzing all my thoughts, first noticing my reactions, breaking down the core reason I was getting mad, cutting off the reaction, and reflecting on the entire process to gain a full understanding of my thought processes and emotional reactions. Over time, you build a habit and make progress in controlling that anger.

 

[ImTelling]

If I'm active against my will, it always leads to anxiety attacks and bursts of tears. It never works for me.


I tried to cut sugar and worked for three months, now I'm addicted again. I never get used to not having sugar in my life, it's like an unstoppable force.

You should try cutting out sugar again by going for diet versions of the soft drinks you were consuming. Sugar free preferably. You can get your brain to like the sweetness while still reducing your sugar intake significantly.

 

[Sober4MostDays]

I have no clue to be honest. I think genetics play a role making self-discipline easier for some and a whole lot harder for others. I think I fall into the latter category having 2 alcoholics for parents and both my grandfathers were too and who knows going back even further into my ancestry. I guess what I'd personally really need for better self-discipline is a better and more supportive environment where I can connect better to other people. Not one where I'm socially isolated and low on dopamine with a mom that asks me to go up and get her alcohol everyday and offers to buy me some a lot of the time when I also struggle with alcoholism, but one like rehab and then sober living.