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D

dune7263

Student
Jan 26, 2025
189
I have my reasons to ctb and I know my life will not materially improve, I am confident in that
 
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onmywaytothebusstop

onmywaytothebusstop

~ Transgirl looking for eternal tranquility ~
Feb 9, 2025
230
My rule is to make myself as impulsive and psychotic as possible.

There's quite a few things that can induce that for me.
- alcohol
- Benzos (or the withdrawal of it)
- Upping dose of antidepressants to abruptly stop them
- cutting
- increase stress levels
- putting yourself in a situation you can't come back from - financially, materially,socially, etc...)

Ymmv
 
danny10

danny10

Banned
Jan 8, 2025
263
I'll use benzos to deal with SI.
 
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NonEssential

NonEssential

Hanging in there
Jan 15, 2025
416
SI is the reason why I can't really even consider partial hanging. It needs to full suspension if I want it to work.
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,397
I don't fear death, I personally fear suffering in this cruel, torturous existence, what terrifies me is how a human can suffer for so long in this existence where there is no limit as to how much agony one can feel, to me existence really is an abomination. I'd be so relieved to never exist ever again, in this horrific reality where there is all this endless suffering and cruelty non-existence is all that's positive for me, I wish there's the option to just choose to fall asleep permanently with no risks of it going wrong and leading to way worse torture as I'd always prefer to not exist than suffer in this existence just to decay and die anyway.
 
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D

dontwakemeup

Wizard
Nov 11, 2024
692
I think life becomes so painful at some point to you. It's unbearable to continue on and you've exhausted everything that could possibly help your internal pain. The choice becomes easier when you becomes hopeless. I was always sober on my attempts. I never wanted to die honestly, I just wanted the pain to stop. If someone told me in 3 months I'd feel better, I never would have ever tried. That's never possible of course. I didn't care what the other side was or wasn't, I just knew staying here was unbearable during my attempts.
 
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DivineSpark

DivineSpark

Elementalist
Feb 9, 2025
809
My survival instinct is dead. I have no fear of death, but I have fear of suffering.
 
F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
12,168
I'm going to picture the (suspected) narcissist I might have to see again if I don't CTB. That ought to be enough to push me over the edge. They feel more frightening than anything else on this earth to me.
 

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