How do you deal with growing apart from siblings?

[trying ungracefully]

My older brother moved out a while ago but me and my younger brother still live at home.

My older brother and I fought when we were kids (still loved each other and played), became close as teens, and then grew apart as adults. We aren't even that old yet either, I'm 22 he's 24. He moved out when he was 18 and since then the communication has just lessened. I asked him when he can come over because I crocheted him a pair of pants he wanted and he said he'd check when he is free since he works a lot. He never got back to me. He still texted me about something happening at his apartment which was nice but not with seeing him.

My younger brother and I weren't close at all growing up. It was only when I was 17 and him 14 that we started bonding. Now that we are older we are just doing our own things. He leaves to hang out with his friends all the time and I am going to my boyfriend's house. We talk a lot less and it seems like when I talk to him he doesn't care to listen and is only acknowledging. He did come into my room yesterday to tell me about his friend that got his fingertips blown off by a firework but that is the first time in a while we had a conversation that lasted more than a minute.

How do you deal with growing apart from your siblings when nothing even happened? I don't have friends so it makes it hard for me because I don't have the socialization I was getting before. I have people to still talk to like my parents, boyfriend, grandma, and great aunt but I am also just missing my brothers. I want to talk to them about stuff that is going on in my life but it doesn't seem like they care to listen (I mean it's small stuff) and like I am just annoying them by trying to communicate.

It's hard seeing them move on with their lives in a different way than I am and that's why the communication is lacking. I don't know how to deal with that either, it makes me so suicidal sometimes even moreso because my younger brother is already getting ahead of me and I'm 22 and he's turning 19.

 

[SuicideWebsiteUsern]

I feel like maybe doing fun things together can help with bonding maybe it could be board games or video games or anything you think you both would find fun like maybe going on a hike together tho the chances of them agreeing to go on a hike would be less likely than playing some random board games but yeah i feel like when you try to have like a conversation one can feel like there isnt really much to say or talk to others especially if its a brother sister relationship because boys and girls like different things I guess and have different interests
but how i kind of bonded was just playing stupid games with each other well when you are really young its easy because you can participate in even stupider and goofy stuff like pillow fights maybe you can do that even when you are an adult but yeah i would probably say maybe playing some board games or any fun activities can help and dont let the not having conversation part get to you because it really can feel like there is not really much to talk about
tho yeah when your older brother is not home and if you wanna communicate i feel like asking specific or particular questions might not be the way since it may feel like being they are interrogated just try to goof around and yeah see where the conversation goes and if there is a chance that it goes nowhere know that you did what you could
as for your younger brother getting ahead of you part yeah it can get to one thats totally understandable but its life you know i would say happy for him but easier said than done
I wish you the best

 

[trying ungracefully]

I feel like maybe doing fun things together can help with bonding maybe it could be board games or video games or anything you think you both would find fun like maybe going on a hike together tho the chances of them agreeing to go on a hike would be less likely than playing some random board games but yeah i feel like when you try to have like a conversation one can feel like there isnt really much to say or talk to others especially if its a brother sister relationship because boys and girls like different things I guess and have different interests
but how i kind of bonded was just playing stupid games with each other well when you are really young its easy because you can participate in even stupider and goofy stuff like pillow fights maybe you can do that even when you are an adult but yeah i would probably say maybe playing some board games or any fun activities can help and dont let the not having conversation part get to you because it really can feel like there is not really much to talk about
tho yeah when your older brother is not home and if you wanna communicate i feel like asking specific or particular questions might not be the way since it may feel like being they are interrogated just try to goof around and yeah see where the conversation goes and if there is a chance that it goes nowhere know that you did what you could
as for your younger brother getting ahead of you part yeah it can get to one thats totally understandable but its life you know i would say happy for him but easier said than done
I wish you the best

Thank you. We do have a switch that has Mario kart and Mario party on it so I could ask my brother that lives at home to play sometime when he is not doing anything.

And yeah I send tiktoks to him even though he barely responds to keep some sort of communication going. He'll sometimes say something about what I send too which is nice.

 

[SuicideWebsiteUsern]

Thank you. We do have a switch that has Mario kart and Mario party on it so I could ask my brother that lives at home to play sometime when he is not doing anything.

And yeah I send tiktoks to him even though he barely responds to keep some sort of communication going. He'll sometimes say something about what I send too which is nice.

yeah or tell him to play even when he is doing something lol siblings are allowed to bother each other lol (i do it from time to time i mean worst case scenario they dont play which he isnt already) until and unless its something really important like a meeting or something like that
also yeah it would be nice if he responds more regularly and he totally should however like when people go out and kinda get involved in their own lives it gets difficult to keep having conversations i have my fair share of cousins which i am not contact with regularly or if at all but if we somehow run into each other in a function or are visitng each other we will have a good time even tho there is no communication beside that
But i guess its different for different people

 

[1000memoryleaks]

My older brother moved out a while ago but me and my younger brother still live at home.

My older brother and I fought when we were kids (still loved each other and played), became close as teens, and then grew apart as adults. We aren't even that old yet either, I'm 22 he's 24. He moved out when he was 18 and since then the communication has just lessened. I asked him when he can come over because I crocheted him a pair of pants he wanted and he said he'd check when he is free since he works a lot. He never got back to me. He still texted me about something happening at his apartment which was nice but not with seeing him.

My younger brother and I weren't close at all growing up. It was only when I was 17 and him 14 that we started bonding. Now that we are older we are just doing our own things. He leaves to hang out with his friends all the time and I am going to my boyfriend's house. We talk a lot less and it seems like when I talk to him he doesn't care to listen and is only acknowledging. He did come into my room yesterday to tell me about his friend that got his fingertips blown off by a firework but that is the first time in a while we had a conversation that lasted more than a minute.

How do you deal with growing apart from your siblings when nothing even happened? I don't have friends so it makes it hard for me because I don't have the socialization I was getting before. I have people to still talk to like my parents, boyfriend, grandma, and great aunt but I am also just missing my brothers. I want to talk to them about stuff that is going on in my life but it doesn't seem like they care to listen (I mean it's small stuff) and like I am just annoying them by trying to communicate.

It's hard seeing them move on with their lives in a different way than I am and that's why the communication is lacking. I don't know how to deal with that either, it makes me so suicidal sometimes even moreso because my younger brother is already getting ahead of me and I'm 22 and he's turning 19.

in my opinion the most effective (and hardest way) to strengthen that bond again is to face some kind of difficulty together or live together for a period of time. with the first suggestion it could be many things and not all of it has to be negative, you could for example help them move in/out or do an odd job/task together like fixing something within the house. alternatively you can also spend a week living together but i'm not sure what context to go for. maybe a vacation for a week or just a long sleepover? inviting them over for 1 day doesn't hurt but i don't think it would help that much either, it would just feel like a task that has to be done and once it's over everything continues as if nothing even happened

 

[hvk]

me and my little sister started drifting apart maybe only a year ago, not sure if i have any good advice, but i definitely relate.

How do you deal with growing apart from your siblings when nothing even happened?

maybe i did something that made her snap at me, but i ask myself this a lot. i usually just trolled her by bothering her and whatnot, but the fact that we can chill when were eating or something makes me question things. most days i could walk up to her and shell just immediately tell me to leave, which i do nowadays. back then i stayed and kept bothering her.

honestly, the only way ive had like quality time with her is getting food or shopping or wtv she likes. might be a little stupid but if ur brother ever picks up those pants try adding getting lunch or something after together so it isnt a one and done kinda deal. kinda makes my post a bit redundant considering what others have said, but i hope it helps knowing theres people in similar situations.

 

[Cepheuss]

Honestly i dont, my brother moved to Germany 6ish years ago and now we only speak on birthdays and funerals. I spoke to him for the first time this year on friday and its just sad i wanna be close with family

 

[Lost in a Dream]

I just don't care about my siblings. They mean absolutely nothing to me. Sorry that you want a relationship with your older brother and yet you guys are still becoming more and more distant than you wish you guys were. I have one older brother and a younger sister but like I said, I really don't care about them at all.

 

[locallyringedspace]

no advice, but i relate hard ... im the older sister that moved out though, idk why but it's just so hard to keep up contact with my little brother even tho i love him. ik he looks up to me and he has an idea of what im dealing with and he texts me all the time and it makes me feel terrible. he and my boyfriend are my main reasons for sticking around but the distance from him makes it hard