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Wasted it all.
- May 19, 2026
- 12
I'm waiting for my method to arrive and i'm just rotting in bed, trying to avoid sunlight and be awake when it's night time and somewhat calm.
Can't play the games i loved, watch shows, anime, the music, everything is bland, can't even enjoy food or drinks, they have no taste.
The only thing i know for real is that i am entirely focused on that method arriving, that's the only thing that matters.
Yet it isn't there and it's driving me crazy, straight up insane. I try to drink to pass time faster but it's not doing that good of a job.
There's nothing left for me to enjoy or look forward to except my way of ctb, which makes me angry aswell because i couldn't muster the courage to use more accessible and direct methods.
How do you cope with the wait when nothing else matters ?
Can't play the games i loved, watch shows, anime, the music, everything is bland, can't even enjoy food or drinks, they have no taste.
The only thing i know for real is that i am entirely focused on that method arriving, that's the only thing that matters.
Yet it isn't there and it's driving me crazy, straight up insane. I try to drink to pass time faster but it's not doing that good of a job.
There's nothing left for me to enjoy or look forward to except my way of ctb, which makes me angry aswell because i couldn't muster the courage to use more accessible and direct methods.
How do you cope with the wait when nothing else matters ?
