i have already formulated my plan and i expect to ctb in less than 14 days. i only told one person about my plan (which is a good friend of mine) and currently she's both supportive/respective of my decision and of course attempting to convince to stay alive. my boyfriend and i are in a rocky relationship but i love him very much and i know he feels the same (the reason our relationship is rocky is because we're both mentally unstable but otherwise we're doing good.) and currently he suspects im breaking up with him probably due to my odd behaviour recently and also because we got into something troublesome just a few days ago. hes also been tweeting negative stuff too. since i only have a few days left i want to make the most of it because of course i'll be missing out on a lot of stuff, and i don't want to ctb in a bad situation with my bf... any advice will do and im sorry if i didn't really make sense you can ask me to elaborate, im not very good at explaining
Spend time with him, and when you're ready give it to him straight. There's no doubt in my mind he will try to convince you to stay and i know it will be hard for the both of you, i've never been in this situation but I know it will be extremely difficult since its the one you love the most. Also tell him somewhere private just cause its such a hard/personal thing to discuss. Really sorry this was your last choice, but I'm also happy for you. I hope whatever finds you after life is better than the life you have now
i think i will. now i'm only problemising when or how i'll break the news to him. thanks for the advice :)
FuneralCry
Just wanting some peace
- Sep 24, 2020
- 38,878
I wouldn't recommend telling people in advance if one actually wishes to go through with ctb as the fact is that so many in this world refuse to accept the right to die, and it could just lead to people selfishly interfering with plans. I would see it as being better to write a note instead which could give an explanation so that those left behind aren't left with as many unanswered questions.
No matter what there will always be unanswered questions and each answer brings up new questions.
If you don't tell about your ctb decision, you could still try to talk about the unbearable pain life has attached to it for you
Can't formulate an answer without knowing the particular situation. However, as a matter of principle, my feeling is this: unless there is a kind of suicidal consensus between yourself and your bf, it seems inconceivable to tell him "Dear, I love you, but I am going to take my own life soon. Wish me farewell". Obviously, he will never accept that, even if his love for you is infinite.
A suicide is a very personal and secret affair, almost impossible to share with loved ones.
Considering the other party's point of view, the idea of your self-inflicted death is something totally unacceptable in advance (once again, unless there is a very particular and unusual arrangement between you and him).
My two pence.
A suicide is a very personal and secret affair, almost impossible to share with loved ones.
Considering the other party's point of view, the idea of your self-inflicted death is something totally unacceptable in advance (once again, unless there is a very particular and unusual arrangement between you and him).
My two pence.
BasqueClown
Zirkua ata heriotza
- Jun 9, 2022
- 121
I suggest to leave him a letter explaining that your decision isn't because the breaking up. Surely he will have a shock and mourn, but at least the letter will be an explainatory about your situation and he doesn't have any responsibility. Also the letter could help into civil or penal consequences and ease the mourning process.
It's up to you, remember we can't suggest to do it or not to doing it. It's your decision. But the letter could help a lot in a post mortem scenario.
I hope and wish you peace!
It's up to you, remember we can't suggest to do it or not to doing it. It's your decision. But the letter could help a lot in a post mortem scenario.
I hope and wish you peace!
bloop714
Member
- Mar 26, 2023
- 37
Schedule a text or mail or anything, but don't tell him in advance, you don't know if he too will react like your friend, so don't take any risk and spend as much time you can with him
locked*n*loaded
Archangel
- Apr 15, 2022
- 7,258
If you want to create the possibility of having your plan thwarted, then you tell others of your plan. If not, then you don't.
Knowing about someones plan to ctb and not stoping them is a legal liability in many jurisdictions. Maybe he would have an option to keep it secret that he knew, but it could be a huge burned. I see no reason to leave him with such burden (and risk him getting into trouble for not stopping you, dealing with the police, being blamed even if not by the court, it could be traumatic) when you're able to simply not tell him. It is awful that it can't be discussed openly, but it can't. Telling someone about own plans to ctb is rarely exactly consensual, you just dump this stuff on a person and expect them to accept it and keep it secret. If they are expected to keep it secret, why couldn't you? I hate that this can't be discussed openly, but it can't. Unless you want an intervention, don't discuss it with people whom you know irl. If you want an intervention, sure, ask for help, for stopping you.
