How do I hide or explain my situation?............it's very humiliating

[IsThisTheEnd?]

How can I hide the fact that I don't have any friends, I have very little life experience, I'm a loner etc
it's very humiliating living like this, what am I suppose to do apart from ctb.

 

[Squiddy]

Maybe you can join a social club or something?

 

[BitterlyAlive]

How can I hide the fact that I don't have any friends, I have very little life experience, I'm a loner etc
it's very humiliating living like this, what am I suppose to do apart from ctb.

Is there any way you can try group therapy? Maybe volunteering somewhere that feels like a safe starting ground like an animal shelter?

 

[Life_and_Death]

(sorry if this kinda steals your thread (basically doesnt exactly help anything) but im thinking and i thought id say it) i never much thought about it but i dont really have any irl friends. i use to be friends with everyone but they all used me so i got rid of them. for 5 years (ish) now ive basically been friendless aside from the people i meet on suicide forums and befriend. i never really thought about it and it never really bothered me but i think thats becasue im dissociated so im inside myself anyway making human interactions difficult for me to follow along with while online i can read and respond whenever i please. im starting to wonder if maybe this isnt making me worse though........

 

[BitterlyAlive]

(sorry if this kinda steals your thread (basically doesnt exactly help anything) but im thinking and i thought id say it) i never much thought about it but i dont really have any irl friends. i use to be friends with everyone but they all used me so i got rid of them. for 5 years (ish) now ive basically been friendless aside from the people i meet on suicide forums and befriend. i never really thought about it and it never really bothered me but i think thats becasue im dissociated so im inside myself anyway making human interactions difficult for me to follow along with while online i can read and respond whenever i please. im starting to wonder if maybe this isnt making me worse though........

Dissociation is so hard to deal with. They say there's ways to deal with it, but...at the same time, I'm kind of comfortable feeling dissociated sometimes. It can be cozy.

What causes you to feel it may be making you worse? Is it the general atmosphere of the website?

 

[Life_and_Death]

Dissociation is so hard to deal with. They say there's ways to deal with it, but...at the same time, I'm kind of comfortable feeling dissociated sometimes. It can be cozy.

What causes you to feel it may be making you worse? Is it the general atmosphere of the website?

lots of research says theres no direct fix for dissociation the way other disorders have medication or therapy that helps. to fix dissociation you must first fix the underlying problems of course im talking about 24/7 dissociation. theres grounding techniques for the kind that comes and goes but mine are just here

the people (for the most part theres always a few people you cant get along with everyone) is fine but by being on my computer 24/7 im not allowing myself to reconnect with the world and therefore keeping myself inside my head. but i dont have much else to do at the moment plus i like talking to people i just cant hold verbal conversations very well because of it

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

Really I mean how can I hide it from people I might meet in day to day life, maybe even at work, it's very humiliating not having friends, children etc

I feel I have to constantly lie or hide away in-case people find out the truth.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Really I mean how can I hide it from people I might meet in day to day life, maybe even a work, it's very humiliating not having friends, children etc

I feel I have to constantly lie or hide away in-case people find out the truth.

my cant you just not mention it?

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

people tend to ask questions like who do you live with, do you have a partner etc

 

[Life_and_Death]

people tend to ask questions like who do you live with, do you have a partner etc

none of that is really any of their concern. also you could always tell the truth mixed in with a fib "i live by myself, i just havent found the one yet"

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

yeah it true but we both know I'm a loser and need to hide it.

 

[almost_dead]

How can I hide the fact that I don't have any friends, I have very little life experience, I'm a loner etc
it's very humiliating living like this, what am I suppose to do apart from ctb.

Why 2 humans want to be friends with each other ? To exploit each other for various reason (to escape loneliness , to get help in work , to escape fear ) etc . Truth is that No 2 humans care about each other. Even the modern day love is all full of jealousy , clinginess etc .

TLDR : Dont ever depend/trust anyone . Not even people here on SS . Depend only on yourself if you dont want to be left alone in times of need . Depend only on yourself to avoid betrayals .

 

[GrumpyFrog]

yeah it true but we both know I'm a loser and need to hide it.

I really don't mean to be mean, but...why?
Why does it make you loser? I don't see it.
Why do you need to hide it?

I have no close friends either. I also don't have a family or a relationship and I hadn't in a while. I make absolutely no effort to hide it, in fact I made a joke about bringing my cats to an event where we were supposed to bring SO/families at a meeting where pretty much all of my co-workers were present and it didn't even cross my mind that I might be humiliating myself. I have yet to experience anyone having a negative reaction to me saying I don't have friends or family. The only thing I can think of is that women my age don't include me in most of their conversations because many things they are discussing have to do with family, but I don't see why you or me would want to be included into chatter about babies and picking family vacations.
In fact, if you ask me if my co-workers have a family and/or friends, the honest answer in most cases would be "probably, but really I don't know and I don't care", and I'm fairly sure that the feeling is mutual, because people forgotten if I was married multiple times before. Your co-workers wouldn't care either, they simply aren't invested in whatever is happening in your life as long as it has nothing to do with your work. Unless you befriend them, but then you wouldn't be able to say you have no friends, right?

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

I really don't mean to be mean, but...why?
Why does it make you loser? I don't see it.
Why do you need to hide it?

I have no close friends either. I also don't have a family or a relationship and I hadn't in a while. I make absolutely no effort to hide it, in fact I made a joke about bringing my cats to an event where we were supposed to bring SO/families at a meeting where pretty much all of my co-workers were present and it didn't even cross my mind that I might be humiliating myself. I have yet to experience anyone having a negative reaction to me saying I don't have friends or family. The only thing I can think of is that women my age don't include me in most of their conversations because many things they are discussing have to do with family, but I don't see why you or me would want to be included into chatter about babies and picking family vacations.
In fact, if you ask me if my co-workers have a family and/or friends, the honest answer in most cases would be "probably, but really I don't know and I don't care", and I'm fairly sure that the feeling is mutual, because people forgotten if I was married multiple times before. Your co-workers wouldn't care either, they simply aren't invested in whatever is happening in your life as long as it has nothing to do with your work. Unless you befriend them, but then you wouldn't be able to say you have no friends, right?

Your adorable now why can't I meet people like you.

 

[almost_dead]

Your adorable now why can't I meet people like you.

you're*

 

[GrumpyFrog]

@IsThisTheEnd? , you're a nice, polite person and that's what matters. No one half-decent is going to think that you're a loser, and even though I know that it might be hard to believe after some negative experiences, but the vast majority of people are at least half-decent. If you give people a chance, you will meet all kinds of people, they are all out there. Not only rude and mean people, although I can't deny those ones are out there too, but the friendly ones, the ones you can relate to, the ones that might not have any friends as well and really want to befriend you. As long as you aren't being mean to others, there is nothing bad about being honest about yourself and your life, most people aren't going to judge you.
Good luck!