How do I determine which thoughts are SI and which are my own?

[Ambivalent1]

If I have a last minute regret as I stand at the bridge, is that SI or me?

 

[Forever Sleep]

You're bound to feel fear. Just like sky divers presumably feel fear before they jump out a plane. I wonder what does actually go through someone's head while they stand on the edge and think about jumping. I imagine most of it would be trying to repress the fear- rather than a logical thought process on whether this is something you really want.

I would say- if you're waiting to know for sure until that moment though- then, you already have doubts in a calm state of mind.

I expect people jump without being sure though. I'm sure some are still feeling fear when they jump- I guess they just force themselves to do it. Some have even said they regretted it the moment they jumped- but I expect fear and the feeling of falling might well do that.

 

[Ambivalent1]

You're bound to feel fear. Just like sky divers presumably feel fear before they jump out a plane. I wonder what does actually go through someone's head while they stand on the edge and think about jumping. I imagine most of it would be trying to repress the fear- rather than a logical thought process on whether this is something you really want.

I would say- if you're waiting to know for sure until that moment though- then, you already have doubts in a calm state of mind.

I expect people jump without being sure though. I'm sure some are still feeling fear when they jump- I guess they just force themselves to do it. Some have even said they regretted it the moment they jumped- but I expect fear and the feeling of falling might well do that.

I never have a calm state of mind. Some people jump immediately probably because they know they need to despite the fear

 

[FuneralCry]

I think that if one is fully aware that suicide is truly what they wish for yet they still have fears related to the method then to me that's the survival instinct as it's like the SI exists just to prolong suffering and keep us trapped here.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I think that's an interesting way of putting it. I guess I don't think of the SI as something separate. It's a part of you; one of the voices within you. If it's kicking in, there's a part of you that wants to stay, even if that is just a biological instinct.

We often have other instinctive voices within us and often make the choice to override them, using whatever criteria seems to make sense to us at the time. Think of a bride having wedding jitters on her wedding day, even if she's marrying the love of her life. There's always some element of fear of the unknown. But in those cases, more often than not, logic points them t going through with it.

So if you have last minute regret, perhaps it's not best to just try to shut it out, but use the opportunity to confirm for yourself that, despite any possible reservations or fear of the unknown, this is the best course for you.

 

[EndJstifiesTheMeans]

SI really happened to me so many times
I've spent days literally going up and down the chair

 

[020x]

When SI kicks in, you don't even realise that it's your SI that took over, you're just really scared and you want it to stop. That's why you need to learn to fight against your fear first. Try jumping from something that won't kill you, then do the same thing that will, when you'll go for the ctb. Anyways, good luck with everything.

 

[Ambivalent1]

SI really happened to me so many times
I've spent days literally going up and down the chair

Exercising?

When SI kicks in, you don't even realise that it's your SI that took over, you're just really scared and you want it to stop. That's why you need to learn to fight against your fear first. Try jumping from something that won't kill you, then do the same thing that will, when you'll go for the ctb. Anyways, good luck with everything.

Hmm how jump without injury?

 

[EndJstifiesTheMeans]

Exercising?

i thought it will be easy after some times but maybe even worse because u know the pain so body is scared more i think