Help how do i deal with jealousy?

[sillymafia]

ive been having this issue for a while, i have always had really bad self esteem, causing me to be jealous to a debilitating degree.
another context is that i have autism, im really protective of my interests but each time i talk about them, and my friends get into it because of it, i feel like everytime i tell someone about something i like they beat me at and make me extremely jealous, it and make me stop enjoying it as much.
its not only interest, its money and parental relationships and having other friends and getting more attention too.
i know its really selfish, and being aware of that only makes it worse, today i bashed my head against the wall for a while during a mentak breakdown because of it, what do i do to get better? what steps can i take?? please help, im scared ill drive evergone away and become alone again and end up ctb because of it, please help

 

[mortuarymary]

We need to do something about that self esteem

 

[sugar_kitty]

ive been having this issue for a while, i have always had really bad self esteem, causing me to be jealous to a debilitating degree.
another context is that i have autism, im really protective of my interests but each time i talk about them, and my friends get into it because of it, i feel like everytime i tell someone about something i like they beat me at and make me extremely jealous, it and make me stop enjoying it as much.
its not only interest, its money and parental relationships and having other friends and getting more attention too.
i know its really selfish, and being aware of that only makes it worse, today i bashed my head against the wall for a while during a mentak breakdown because of it, what do i do to get better? what steps can i take?? please help, im scared ill drive evergone away and become alone again and end up ctb because of it, please help

I am exactly like that and that's so annoying, thanks for sharing this it makes me feels less alone. I don't really have any big advice because I'm still learning to deal with it. Anyway, my only tip that could maybe help you is : I stopped sharing recent interest to my bestie, only old ones or one that I'm not so obsessed with anymore, so we can still talk about it but I won't feel so jealous and I will still like it lol.
But for relationships I still haven't figured that out sorry, I hope we could do something about this.

 

[BeautyWSaveTheWorld]

Honestly, the most helpful thing I can recommend regarding the jealousy is every time you notice you're feeling it, try somehow reducing it by making peace with the situation you're in, ignoring it, or whatever seems to workt the best. I know this solution isn't ideal, but it's the best one I've got. Reducing pride and making peace with the fact that so much of our life is out of our own control seemed to make it better for me. But honesly, jealousy isn't that huge of a problem for me.
Regarding the self esteem, knowing how small we are in this world made the problem of comparing myself to others a lot less of an issue. Knowing more about the world seemed to help me the most, because when I finally noticed how trivial social media and most of the society's demands are, things that I hated most with myself suddenly lost a lot of their worth, which helped me a lot. Sadly, I'm stuck in society which isn't the most tolerant and open, so I also highly recommend visiting Scandinavia. Me seeing how their society functions helped me A LOT with my sense of purpose. Seeing all those people so tolerant and respectful was one of the most eye opening experiences in my entire life. If you ever get the chance to go there and meet some of the locals (of white demographic of course), be sure to grab it!