Venting How did your loved ones react to your SH? (Discussion, venting, and straight up story time)

[what use is a name]

How did y'alls loved ones react to your sh? Because mine made me only want to cut more.


When my sister found out she just kept talking about herself and how she doesn't want me to turn into her. So much tears, and in the end I told her I threw away the razor. A shitty lie but it was good enough to make her shut up. I told her I was gonna try to get better. Also a shitty lie.
Then she told me she was gonna tattle to mom like she always does and I just completely broke down. Quiet sobs as she asked mom to go on a car ride with her to tell her. I fell asleep on my bed sobbing and the next thing I know my mother's yelling from downstairs, louder then I've ever here her, to fold laundry (my sister confronted me as I was in the middle of folding).
So I went to do it while my Mother and sister continueto talk on the porch.

My mom never mentioned it.
Even gave me a cheap pocket knife about 2 to 3 weeks later.

My sister made a SH joke and then told me mom was gonna send both of us to therapy and even giggled to herself.
My mom took her to therapy. Apparently a really good one. I never did go to therapy. It's been 3 years and it still huants me how my mom reacted. And how it was so easily forgotten a sweaped under the rug like it was nothing.


I think I'm a month clean now? Last time I did it was the first time I did it in response to another person. I always promised myself that I wouldn't do it right after someone upset me so there would be, ig separation from the person and the cuts? And so I can't really say to my family "you make me cut myself" so I would save their feelings. But now my mother isn't apart of that after last month. She's usually sweet so if whens she's cruel it hits harder then usually. Tell me if y'all understand the feeling of separating the reason for the cut, and the cut itself.

And what I want as a whole by posting this? Just some listening ears and to know I'm not the only one with a mother that rather think it never happened then to face it. With peace and love

 

[TheCallOfTheStars]

My ex was the only one who noticed and didn't even react. She didn't even show any concern for how I was feeling and just asked if my mom was gonna notice. I dunno, it's really all just a blur at this point. Though I remember her also telling me to not do it again and getting a bit worried when I went to the restroom because she thought I was gonna cut myself again. It felt weird that she showed no concern that I cut myself the first time and only after the damage was done did she show an ounce of worry.

 

[BrainSplatter]

I was 21 that the first time I cut deep past the muscle and I remember running downstairs holding my arm bleeding everywhere I said I needed to go the hospital to get stitches my dad didn't even react didn't offer to drive so I started running down the road in panic and called for a ambulance i remember feeling so light headed when the paramedics finally arrived ended up getting 16 stitches it's my biggest scar covering over half of my forearm ;)

 

[adiosToreador]

my dad basically said "that's a dumb thing to do" and my grandma asked me if i was going to stop playing with razor blades. pretty underwhelming reactions, but i was grateful for them. i was surprised, though!!! it's not like i have super gnarly scars or anything, but they're (mostly) pretty noticable scars from styros. nobody really did anything, just told me to quit. which i did for a while, for the record!!!

 

[woodlandcreature]

Screamed at me. Made fun of it. No one ever asked why or showed any concern. Been doing it since I was around 10.

 

[MapleS]

they were understanding and helpfull... for like 3 days

 

[nitritegirl]

i cut myself because of my mom, and when she saw it (which took a few days), she was like, "you need help"

no, YOU need fucking help, mom.

 

[orpheus_]

First time, when I was 12, they went into panic and took me for "a serious talk" when they asked me what happened and do I need help... Well I was too afraid to tell them the truth and I know they meant well but it was just all so dramatic. I told them some bullshit that it was a single stressful situation and promised not to do it again... Well, my mom forced me to wear short sleeves for the next few months. She also questioned me about EVERY wound she saw on my body and forced me to show myself naked to "make sure I wasn't cutting".

It's... So terrible yet funny, how some people never notice you struggle and when you physically harm yourself, they go into full panic and start doing too much, meaning well but ending up controlling you.

For the second time, when I was 20, they noticed a small cut on my forearm (..if they only saw the absolute mess on the parts of my body covered by clothes). They asked if it was self harm a few times. I just kept repeating that "it's my business" and they eventually stopped asking about it. Probably because they never saw any more fresh wounds. And it should stay that way

 

[Cauliflour]

People just tend to get mad at me and they don't like listening to my motive so they come up with whatever reason they want, and then they either forget or try to give me another event to think about at 1 in the morning. I've got a pretty niche reason and nobody irl believes me and just treat me like I'm an idiot going through a phase. "YoU'lL rEgReT hAvING tHOSe ScArS wHeN yOu'Re OlDeR" y'know, pointless shit like that. I try to avoid discussions on self harm with them at all costs so they don't start taking my voice away from me again.

 

[darksouls]

my mother told me that I should be ashamed of it

 

[westerly_merlin]

My mother freaked out and pushed me into the garden so I didn't drip on the kitchen floor. Then said it was a stupid thing to do and put 3 butterfly stitches on the cut.

(This was 1980 so well before SH was discussed)

Now I only tell my therapist and she looks disappointed but accepts it is a coping mechanism when I am overwhelmed.

 

[Self Medicated]

My mother freaked out and pushed me into the garden so I didn't drip on the kitchen floor. Then said it was a stupid thing to do and put 3 butterfly stitches on the cut.

(This was 1980 so well before SH was discussed)

Now I only tell my therapist and she looks disappointed but accepts it is a coping mechanism when I am overwhelmed.

Amazing how we're all unique but sometimes part of someone's story can look like a mirror of your own. This kind of thing freaks mums out.
Even the same decade. Same response from my therapist too. The only difference probably is I hide nothing these days, I'm like a full length "wtf are you looking at?" billboard for SH and mum just quietly says she wishes I wouldn't do that, which makes me sad but...
She has a point though I feel way too old for this shit.

 

[FoxSauce]

My mom said what if I did everything time I have a problem?

I was kind of in shock well surprised

She continued: what if I decided to cut myself beacuse im fat what woukd you do?

I only responded telling her to stop but I dsidnt feel that empathy she was trying to convey.

I had other ppl ask me why I do which well I try to explain the best I can.

I never been called out like : thats dumb but if i relapse my kom gets pretty mad and my sisters do too but ik it comes from worry for me than actual anger.