How did y'alls loved ones react to your sh? Because mine made me only want to cut more.
When my sister found out she just kept talking about herself and how she doesn't want me to turn into her. So much tears, and in the end I told her I threw away the razor. A shitty lie but it was good enough to make her shut up. I told her I was gonna try to get better. Also a shitty lie.
Then she told me she was gonna tattle to mom like she always does and I just completely broke down. Quiet sobs as she asked mom to go on a car ride with her to tell her. I fell asleep on my bed sobbing and the next thing I know my mother's yelling from downstairs, louder then I've ever here her, to fold laundry (my sister confronted me as I was in the middle of folding).
So I went to do it while my Mother and sister continueto talk on the porch.
My mom never mentioned it.
Even gave me a cheap pocket knife about 2 to 3 weeks later.
My sister made a SH joke and then told me mom was gonna send both of us to therapy and even giggled to herself.
My mom took her to therapy. Apparently a really good one. I never did go to therapy. It's been 3 years and it still huants me how my mom reacted. And how it was so easily forgotten a sweaped under the rug like it was nothing.
I think I'm a month clean now? Last time I did it was the first time I did it in response to another person. I always promised myself that I wouldn't do it right after someone upset me so there would be, ig separation from the person and the cuts? And so I can't really say to my family "you make me cut myself" so I would save their feelings. But now my mother isn't apart of that after last month. She's usually sweet so if whens she's cruel it hits harder then usually. Tell me if y'all understand the feeling of separating the reason for the cut, and the cut itself.
And what I want as a whole by posting this? Just some listening ears and to know I'm not the only one with a mother that rather think it never happened then to face it. With peace and love
When my sister found out she just kept talking about herself and how she doesn't want me to turn into her. So much tears, and in the end I told her I threw away the razor. A shitty lie but it was good enough to make her shut up. I told her I was gonna try to get better. Also a shitty lie.
Then she told me she was gonna tattle to mom like she always does and I just completely broke down. Quiet sobs as she asked mom to go on a car ride with her to tell her. I fell asleep on my bed sobbing and the next thing I know my mother's yelling from downstairs, louder then I've ever here her, to fold laundry (my sister confronted me as I was in the middle of folding).
So I went to do it while my Mother and sister continueto talk on the porch.
My mom never mentioned it.
Even gave me a cheap pocket knife about 2 to 3 weeks later.
My sister made a SH joke and then told me mom was gonna send both of us to therapy and even giggled to herself.
My mom took her to therapy. Apparently a really good one. I never did go to therapy. It's been 3 years and it still huants me how my mom reacted. And how it was so easily forgotten a sweaped under the rug like it was nothing.
I think I'm a month clean now? Last time I did it was the first time I did it in response to another person. I always promised myself that I wouldn't do it right after someone upset me so there would be, ig separation from the person and the cuts? And so I can't really say to my family "you make me cut myself" so I would save their feelings. But now my mother isn't apart of that after last month. She's usually sweet so if whens she's cruel it hits harder then usually. Tell me if y'all understand the feeling of separating the reason for the cut, and the cut itself.
And what I want as a whole by posting this? Just some listening ears and to know I'm not the only one with a mother that rather think it never happened then to face it. With peace and love
