None.
When I was young it was easy, the fault was life as I understood it and therefore dying was obvious to me, although I left it in the hands of nature and whatever had to happen with the years.
But now at 44 years old, and knowing that it is my fault for not having understood earlier what it is to live, and being the only person responsible for my life (no one else), I am not sure of absolutely anything regarding the reasons to do the CTB...
... I always hope that a small improvement or a different pronouncement, in the form of a protest, from the unconscious part of my mind will help me change the perspective of it all and find a way that makes me enjoy the life as many and many people can do and will continue to do.. I would like to be one of them (I don't give a shit about the meaning of life if I can get to enjoy it).
//
Cap.
Quan era jove era fàcil, la culpa era de la vida tal i com jo la comprenía i per tant morir era obvi per mi, tot i que ho vaig deixar en mans de la natura i del que fos que hagués de passar amb els anys.
Però ara amb 44 anys, i sabent que la culpa és meva per no haver entés abans en que consisteix viure, i sent jo l'únic responsable de la meva vida (ningú més), no tinc la certesa d'absolutament de res respecte als motius per fer el CTB...
... sempre tinc l'esperança que una petita millora o un pronunciament diferent, en forma de protesta, de la part inconscient de la meva ment m'ajudi a canviar la perspectiva de tot plegat i trobi un camí que em faci gaudir de la vida com tantes i tantes persones poden fer i seguiràn fent.. voldría ser una d'aquestes (no m'importa una merda el sentit de la vida si la puc arribar a gaudir).