Holidays

[SchizoPolyGymnast]

Hi guys, it sure has been awhile. Just wondering if anyone here is super into holidays and if so, how you deal with the emotional challenges they bring.

I love holidays. Am making holiday plans right now. But I also feel deeply sad, especially on New Year's. I used to fantasize about ctb on NYE.

Thoughts?

 

[Ww42]

I love them, I get to see family, give presents, and bring happiness to my family members one last time before I off myself sometime that January. Dying in the month of new years is a new plan of mine. That way I get to see everyone and make last-time happy memories before they're tarnished by the realization that their brother, uncle, fiance, and son killed himself

 

[Just_Another_Person]

I have to endure my family. Good thing this will be my last Holidays lol

 

[mercybell]

Holidays bring a lot of joy that I am unable to take part in. It's bittersweet seeing families take pictures with the Santa at the mall. Or seeing the large Christmas trees. Seeing people doing their Christmas shopping.
I don't want to see another Christmas, but I don't want to stain on others joy of the holidays.

 

[ScaredOfMachines]

It feels kind of painful. The happy families everywhere, the excitement, people overjoyed to go to parties with their friends- it all just reminds me of stuff I'll never have again. I hope to CTB before January, so hopefully this is the last time.

 

[OldManOfTheLake]

I hate this time of year. Like I am laying awake in bed dreading it

 

[dontwakemeup]

I hate the holidays! It reminds me that I don't have a family (I'm adopted). I usually can function everyday and function as a sad/depressed person. It's difficult to hear everyone excited about family gatherings, buys gifts for their loved ones and etc. The ads are too much and doesn't make it better. I hate when people get personal and ask me my plans, it's easier to make something up quick then to explain all of this.This is the hardest time for me, early Nov-mid Jan. I put my airpods in at work and blast music and avoid an conversations with people. If I'm at home I abuse my sleeping pills just to sleep all day. But I'm happy for those who look forward to it, it must be a wonderful feeling.

 

[J&L383]

It feels kind of painful. The happy families everywhere, the excitement, people overjoyed to go to parties with their friends- it all just reminds me of stuff I'll never have again. I hope to CTB before January, so hopefully this is the last time.

Yeah, me too. On the holidays part. Won't CTB by January (so hard to make decisions of any kind) but wouldn't complain too much if I died by then. I hope you find your peace.