Quizzaci0us

Quizzaci0us

Little Frog
Apr 13, 2023
23
Okay, so I've wanted an actual dildo for a long time, and now have the ability to buy one with my own money and own credit card. The thing is, if I buy one, I'm afraid my package will be noticed by my parents.

If my mum found it, she'd probably be understanding, but I don't want to make things awkward for a long time (like, REALLY awkward) My dad would probably take me to a church and get me cleansed. My dad is at work most of the day, (he leaves at 6AM and gets home 5PM), but my mum is home 24/7. If my neice is visiting, then she's asleep with my neice a lot more, and she sometimes visits my sister.

To summarize, the only times I'm home alone is when my mum is at my sister's (even though that is very unpredictable and only occasionally) and my dad is at work. My mum also sometimes takes naps during the day, but other than that, my mum is always home and would know if something was delivered.

I could have it sent to our mailbox, or the post office nearby, but I don't have a car, nor do I leave the house when my parents are home. My dad also checks the mail every evening. I could wait until I'm home alone and bike to the post office, but 1, that's dangerous (I'd have to cross two busy roads), and 2, I don't want any notifications of "you have a package at the post office" being sent, since they always are.

I've also heard of sending packages to friends' houses, but the only friend near me has overprotective parents, and would most likely find it.

Honestly, either I don't buy a dildo, or just have to tough out the embarrassment of my mum finding it.......

Or not. I just had an idea right as I was writing that. Since the toy would most likely come in a package with anything else that was bought (like two items in one box), I could buy something else. Let me explain, I would tell my mum I'm buying something (since I usually do), but leave out the details and say its a surprise for her or my neice, then when it's delivered I take it to my room, unbox it, then just take out the not-a-dildo item I bought and show my mum, then keep the dildo in my room.

I feel like I sound dumb for having an elaborate plan, but it's the only thing I can think of. Over a dildo, too, I probably do sound goofy.

Anyways, if there's any other way that any of you can think of, I'd appreciate it, and any criticism of my current plan. Honestly, I could just not buy a dildo, but I have a little present I want to get for my neice anyways, so this could be a good excuse to buy it for her, and something nice for me <3 :)
 
cami

cami

the lonely
May 27, 2023
186
this might sound a little silly, but heres what i did. okay so i was 17 years old, and i wanted a dildo. i guess i couldnt wait till i turned 18. but, i got one from amazon i think? and also got a bunch of random cheap items. then when my mum grabbed the package, i just said it was you know those items (like some arm warmers and things like that. i didnt get caught, and the dildo lasted me well. haha it was pretty stressful but sometimes elaborate operations are necessary.
 
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Quizzaci0us

Quizzaci0us

Little Frog
Apr 13, 2023
23
this might sound a little silly, but heres what i did. okay so i was 17 years old, and i wanted a dildo. i guess i couldnt wait till i turned 18. but, i got one from amazon i think? and also got a bunch of random cheap items. then when my mum grabbed the package, i just said it was you know those items (like some arm warmers and things like that. i didnt get caught, and the dildo lasted me well. haha it was pretty stressful but sometimes elaborate operations are necessary.
I just texted my mum since she's in bed, and just told her I was buying a little thing for my neice off of Amazon, and that it was gonna be a surprise. I'm bad at lying in person, so texting her is my best bet. If she asks me about it tomorrow I'll just keep telling her that I'm not telling her what it is so she won't tell my neice and ruin the surprise for her. I'm actually kinda excited for my neice's gift, too, so it won't be hard to fake anything. The extra few bucks I can excuse as shipping costs, too.

I'm a little scared that my mum might see it get delivered and open it for me, but she's never done that before and always waits for me to open things because she knows I like to. Other than that, my excuse for taking it into my room could be that I can't find the scissors.

Oh my God I feel so goofy- Like a kid planning to run away and live in the woods forever-
 
No_Lxve

No_Lxve

it's always better to cease to exist
Apr 14, 2023
75
Okay, so I've wanted an actual dildo for a long time, and now have the ability to buy one with my own money and own credit card. The thing is, if I buy one, I'm afraid my package will be noticed by my parents.

If my mum found it, she'd probably be understanding, but I don't want to make things awkward for a long time (like, REALLY awkward) My dad would probably take me to a church and get me cleansed. My dad is at work most of the day, (he leaves at 6AM and gets home 5PM), but my mum is home 24/7. If my neice is visiting, then she's asleep with my neice a lot more, and she sometimes visits my sister.

To summarize, the only times I'm home alone is when my mum is at my sister's (even though that is very unpredictable and only occasionally) and my dad is at work. My mum also sometimes takes naps during the day, but other than that, my mum is always home and would know if something was delivered.

I could have it sent to our mailbox, or the post office nearby, but I don't have a car, nor do I leave the house when my parents are home. My dad also checks the mail every evening. I could wait until I'm home alone and bike to the post office, but 1, that's dangerous (I'd have to cross two busy roads), and 2, I don't want any notifications of "you have a package at the post office" being sent, since they always are.

I've also heard of sending packages to friends' houses, but the only friend near me has overprotective parents, and would most likely find it.

Honestly, either I don't buy a dildo, or just have to tough out the embarrassment of my mum finding it.......

Or not. I just had an idea right as I was writing that. Since the toy would most likely come in a package with anything else that was bought (like two items in one box), I could buy something else. Let me explain, I would tell my mum I'm buying something (since I usually do), but leave out the details and say its a surprise for her or my neice, then when it's delivered I take it to my room, unbox it, then just take out the not-a-dildo item I bought and show my mum, then keep the dildo in my room.

I feel like I sound dumb for having an elaborate plan, but it's the only thing I can think of. Over a dildo, too, I probably do sound goofy.

Anyways, if there's any other way that any of you can think of, I'd appreciate it, and any criticism of my current plan. Honestly, I could just not buy a dildo, but I have a little present I want to get for my neice anyways, so this could be a good excuse to buy it for her, and something nice for me <3 :)
hey, I'm glad you aren't embarrassed by typing it here. I'll give you props for that. to answer your question, it would be a good idea to message the seller of deliveryman to deliver it by the backdoor. sometimes when ordering from amazon they have these lockers only you can access. or maybe you can follow up to the plan you had about ordering multiple things. it's a good idea, but I would buy at least 3 things or so just to be safe.

hopefully all goes as planned.
 
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Quizzaci0us

Quizzaci0us

Little Frog
Apr 13, 2023
23
hey, I'm glad you aren't embarrassed by typing it here. I'll give you props for that. to answer your question, it would be a good idea to message the seller of deliveryman to deliver it by the backdoor. sometimes when ordering from amazon they have these lockers only you can access. or maybe you can follow up to the plan you had about ordering multiple things. it's a good idea, but I would buy at least 3 things or so just to be safe.

hopefully all goes as planned.
I did the multiple items plan. I'm really nervous because usually I tell my mum before buying anthing, but this time I just texted her and she's asleep, so she didn't read it or respond before I bought it. I just hope to hell she won't be mad about that, even though it's my money and I used my card. My brain is just racing with all the things that could go wrong now that I've placed the order, even though the chances of her wanting to check the order or for some reason opening the package when it arrives are close to zero. I sent her a screenshot of the address I put in, too, (so she doesn't have to check anything on the online receipt) and used my email and phone number for it so she won't get any notifications about it.

I'm rambling so much- I'm just really scared. I genuinely don't even know if she wouldn't care, or would kill me if she saw it, but I'm assuming the worst. This is the most risky thing I've done behind my parents' back

I'm just so nervous but I think I can pull it off if she asks me anything tomorrow, and when the package arrives
 
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No_Lxve

No_Lxve

it's always better to cease to exist
Apr 14, 2023
75
I did the multiple items plan. I'm really nervous because usually I tell my mum before buying anthing, but this time I just texted her and she's asleep, so she didn't read it or respond before I bought it. I just hope to hell she won't be mad about that, even though it's my money and I used my card. My brain is just racing with all the things that could go wrong now that I've placed the order, even though the chances of her wanting to check the order or for some reason opening the package when it arrives are close to zero. I sent her a screenshot of the address I put in, too, (so she doesn't have to check anything on the online receipt) and used my email and phone number for it so she won't get any notifications about it.

I'm rambling so much- I'm just really scared. I genuinely don't even know if she wouldn't care, or would kill me if she saw it, but I'm assuming the worst. This is the most risky thing I've done behind my parents' back

I'm just so nervous but I think I can pull it off if she asks me anything tomorrow, and when the package arrives
it's just paranoia. I'm sure your parents wouldn't want to go through your whole buying history. Just stick to the plan and you'll be fine.

and if shit hits the fan, which it won't, it would be a good idea to say that the package with your contents is for your "other" friend. not yours.

and by your other friend I don't mean the one with strict parents, say a co-worker from work or school.

hope this helps. I've also had problems with receiving packages so I'm sure this will work too.
 
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babayaga

babayaga

Member
Mar 30, 2022
7
hey, I'm glad you aren't embarrassed by typing it here. I'll give you props for that. to answer your question, it would be a good idea to message the seller of deliveryman to deliver it by the backdoor. sometimes when ordering from amazon they have these lockers only you can access. or maybe you can follow up to the plan you had about ordering multiple things. it's a good idea, but I would buy at least 3 things or so just to be safe.

hopefully all goes as planned.
lmao i'm sorry but delivering the dildo to the backdoor had me rolling, thank you
 
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T

Tiny Little Tree

-
Jan 25, 2021
85
I don't think you should feel dumb or goofy for buying something you're otherwise free to buy but just happen to be constrained by your situation.

I ordered my fair share of stuff, nothing I'd really get in any trouble for apart from wasting money but still tried to dodge my parents for the most part when I could lol. I think I used to always time it to days I knew they'd be out, mainly aiming for like days in the week after their days off. Maybe look into all the features your carrier or the seller/platform offer, I know I can send stuff to the supermarket or certain petrol stations for me to pick up, hopefully one of those is better than the post office for you. You can add pretty detailed instructions too like "leave under bench in garage" but can be hit or miss and could still be pretty easy for someone at home to notice.

I've seen the odd thread of people asking similar things about packages they'd get in a lot more trouble for, maybe you can search up "package" etc. on the forum for more ideas.

Good luck, hope you have a good way of hiding it long term after getting it too, I'm sure there's no shortage of info on that front on the internet.
 
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cami

cami

the lonely
May 27, 2023
186
haha please do keep us updated :) a few of us have probably been there, and we made it through so good luck.
 
W

winamp

Enlightened
May 20, 2023
1,357
I'd rather just go to the nearest store in the mall in a weird disguise than to deal with anyone finding that package especially my neighbour's (the mailmen have delivered my packages to my neighbour's on accident so many times) and then having to deal with actually having somewhere to hide it once it has arrived seems complicated

good luck
 
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Quizzaci0us

Quizzaci0us

Little Frog
Apr 13, 2023
23
Okay, so I've wanted an actual dildo for a long time, and now have the ability to buy one with my own money and own credit card. The thing is, if I buy one, I'm afraid my package will be noticed by my parents.

If my mum found it, she'd probably be understanding, but I don't want to make things awkward for a long time (like, REALLY awkward) My dad would probably take me to a church and get me cleansed. My dad is at work most of the day, (he leaves at 6AM and gets home 5PM), but my mum is home 24/7. If my neice is visiting, then she's asleep with my neice a lot more, and she sometimes visits my sister.

To summarize, the only times I'm home alone is when my mum is at my sister's (even though that is very unpredictable and only occasionally) and my dad is at work. My mum also sometimes takes naps during the day, but other than that, my mum is always home and would know if something was delivered.

I could have it sent to our mailbox, or the post office nearby, but I don't have a car, nor do I leave the house when my parents are home. My dad also checks the mail every evening. I could wait until I'm home alone and bike to the post office, but 1, that's dangerous (I'd have to cross two busy roads), and 2, I don't want any notifications of "you have a package at the post office" being sent, since they always are.

I've also heard of sending packages to friends' houses, but the only friend near me has overprotective parents, and would most likely find it.

Honestly, either I don't buy a dildo, or just have to tough out the embarrassment of my mum finding it.......

Or not. I just had an idea right as I was writing that. Since the toy would most likely come in a package with anything else that was bought (like two items in one box), I could buy something else. Let me explain, I would tell my mum I'm buying something (since I usually do), but leave out the details and say its a surprise for her or my neice, then when it's delivered I take it to my room, unbox it, then just take out the not-a-dildo item I bought and show my mum, then keep the dildo in my room.

I feel like I sound dumb for having an elaborate plan, but it's the only thing I can think of. Over a dildo, too, I probably do sound goofy.

Anyways, if there's any other way that any of you can think of, I'd appreciate it, and any criticism of my current plan. Honestly, I could just not buy a dildo, but I have a little present I want to get for my neice anyways, so this could be a good excuse to buy it for her, and something nice for me <3 :)
UPDATE- The package has been shipped and my mum hasn't asked any questions. She read my texts but didn't really reply, and hasn't said anything about it today. My paranoia was just 100% through the roof yesterday, haha. The estimated delivery is the 22-25 of this month <3
 
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Angst Filled Fuck Up

Angst Filled Fuck Up

Visionary
Sep 9, 2018
2,985
Hope it arrives without parental intervention. Btw I do sell molds of my johnson in discreet packaging if anyone else is interested. Recession, ya know.
 
Quizzaci0us

Quizzaci0us

Little Frog
Apr 13, 2023
23
Hope it arrives without parental intervention. Btw I do sell molds of my johnson in discreet packaging if anyone else is interested. Recession, ya know.
I never thought someone with a donald duck pfp would be advertising molds of their dick on a suicide forum 💀

No hate, that's just funny to me. The packaging for mine is shown to just be a white box, too, so I can easily hide it under my bed without suspicion, or just set it with the other small-medium boxes I keep (For giving gifts, or if I need cardboard for anything)
9099E136 614A 47F4 B943 933CC6B389BE
(Getting onto the app and seeing a kids toy and a cock is so bizarre😭)

Also...uhh.... link to the molds?
👀🫴 I'm a curious mf
 
Last edited:
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Quizzaci0us

Quizzaci0us

Little Frog
Apr 13, 2023
23
UPDATE 2 - I don't know whether the package is going to be delivered to our home or to the post office, but USPS says it should arrive today at around 2PM!! I'm really excited but still a little nervous
 
Quizzaci0us

Quizzaci0us

Little Frog
Apr 13, 2023
23
UPDATE 2 - I don't know whether the package is going to be delivered to our home or to the post office, but USPS says it should arrive today at around 2PM!! I'm really excited but still a little nervous
UPDATE 3- The package was delivered to the mailbox, but I'm gonna have to wait for my dad to pick it up when he gets home because the mailbox is at the end of our road, too far for me to walk. My niece is also over rn, so my mum can't get it
 
Quizzaci0us

Quizzaci0us

Little Frog
Apr 13, 2023
23
UPDATE 3- The package was delivered to the mailbox, but I'm gonna have to wait for my dad to pick it up when he gets home because the mailbox is at the end of our road, too far for me to walk. My niece is also over rn, so my mum can't get it
UPDATE 4- ITS HEREEE

My mum was asleep with my niece, so she didn't even see it. My dad got the package and didn't suspect a thing. I even showed him the toy for my niece so he just thinks that was all in the bag. The box was a bit crushed, but the dildo is the perfect size and stiffness. The suction cup works great, too! There were cheaper dildos I could've gotten, but this one was definitely worth it for the size and everything. Every review was 5 stars with good things to say about it, too. I was a little scared it would be too small, but it's perfect

Thank you everyone for the support! <3
 
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