thefarter
i don’t smoke
- Dec 10, 2025
- 8
hiiiiii everyone :3
i used to have an account on here. i forgot my username so here i am with a new account.
lol i always used to try finding someone to ctb with using sn.. but i just ended up trying myself.
anyway i survived an sn attempt. i didn't have a super detailed plan or anything. i just drank that shtuff. a lil impulsive i must say.
yaaaa it was rubbish.
i did feel super nauseous, dizzy, awful. and i saw myself turning blue. freaked out a bit because i wasn't at home. anyway. i passed out and woke up to paramedics. i called them cute or pretty or something. i ended up in ICU.. i remember being put in the back of an ambulance. and then i think i passed out again.
and it felt like complete garbage waking up with a tube down my throat.
idk a lady came to me and asked me if i knew where i was and i was like nah.. and they took the tube out. and i felt really sick and threw up bile or whatever? i think. the sn taste was still in my mouth.
i could also barely move. my body felt so heavy. i remember from sneaking a peek at my notes that i had a seizure so they injected me with ketamine i think? idk if im making that up. i dont remember properly. and they took all my SN. i should've left the bag at home :/ my mistake
anyway its been like ? 2 years since then.
you know i actually started antidepressants and everything and cbt and i was genuinely trying so hard to not feel like suicide was the only option for me.
but lowkey at some point it just becomes way too much.
i have been an awful gross wretched evil person in the past. and some kids decided to? doxx me? or whatever. so anyway, i tried ignoring that for a good 2-3 years. but yeah idk if there's a point in trying to get better anymore because i feel like everyone i ever meet will always hold my past actions against me. i am genuinely trying to not be awful & crappy anymore. and i do accept that i WAS very awful and crappy in the past. not even denying anything.
anyway, it feels like SN (my beloved), will have to save me this time..
PLEASEEEEEE dm me if you have any SN sources that will ship to UK.
thank u so much ^_^ byeeeee
i used to have an account on here. i forgot my username so here i am with a new account.
lol i always used to try finding someone to ctb with using sn.. but i just ended up trying myself.
anyway i survived an sn attempt. i didn't have a super detailed plan or anything. i just drank that shtuff. a lil impulsive i must say.
yaaaa it was rubbish.
i did feel super nauseous, dizzy, awful. and i saw myself turning blue. freaked out a bit because i wasn't at home. anyway. i passed out and woke up to paramedics. i called them cute or pretty or something. i ended up in ICU.. i remember being put in the back of an ambulance. and then i think i passed out again.
and it felt like complete garbage waking up with a tube down my throat.
idk a lady came to me and asked me if i knew where i was and i was like nah.. and they took the tube out. and i felt really sick and threw up bile or whatever? i think. the sn taste was still in my mouth.
i could also barely move. my body felt so heavy. i remember from sneaking a peek at my notes that i had a seizure so they injected me with ketamine i think? idk if im making that up. i dont remember properly. and they took all my SN. i should've left the bag at home :/ my mistake
anyway its been like ? 2 years since then.
you know i actually started antidepressants and everything and cbt and i was genuinely trying so hard to not feel like suicide was the only option for me.
but lowkey at some point it just becomes way too much.
i have been an awful gross wretched evil person in the past. and some kids decided to? doxx me? or whatever. so anyway, i tried ignoring that for a good 2-3 years. but yeah idk if there's a point in trying to get better anymore because i feel like everyone i ever meet will always hold my past actions against me. i am genuinely trying to not be awful & crappy anymore. and i do accept that i WAS very awful and crappy in the past. not even denying anything.
anyway, it feels like SN (my beloved), will have to save me this time..
PLEASEEEEEE dm me if you have any SN sources that will ship to UK.
thank u so much ^_^ byeeeee
