having bpd is a death sentence

[borderlinealcoholic]

I'm so tired

 

[backtoearth]

I feel you - I am so exhausted and I can't live like this until old age, I don't know how other people can cope with this

 

[hmskms]

having life is a death sentence

 

[landmine]

it rlly is. so painful

 

[borderlinealcoholic]

I feel you - I am so exhausted and I can't live like this until old age, I don't know how other people can cope with this

its just so damn painful the way we feel things, all the deep suffering. Im tired too :(

it rlly is. so painful

and the fact that no one can even comprehend us... anyway im here if you ever want to talk!

 

[soonatpeace777888]

I think I might have this along with OCD but never been diagnosed because I'm afraid to be honest with therapists.

 

[bpdmf]

its horrific. and so isolating knowing that the vast majority of people will never understand

 

[borderline-feline]

its horrific. and so isolating knowing that the vast majority of people will never understand

I think the problem is that most people don't want to understand, so they don't try to.

 

[Cloud Busting]

I just got diagnosed with bpd in the looney bin. They agreed with me that bipolar II was a misdiagnosis and that I was over-medicated and duped. I do have comorbid reoccurring major depressive disorder however.

Reading the Wikipedia page that lists mostly murders and serial killers as having bpd was disheartening. Being a murderer is my biggest fear. Having this diagnosis on file stings like hell in all of its antagonizing, stigmatizing glory.

I just remind myself of my bpd heros. Sylvia Plath, Edward Munch, and Sinéad 'O Connor were beautiful, holy, creative sirens. I feel so deeply and strongly and the trick is making this reactivity an uplifting blessing rather than a self-sabotaging curse.

 

[ama]

I dont have bpd but i have bipolar 1 and i can understand how you feel that no one understands. My life is in shambles because of it and the people who i hold closest tell me nothings wrong with me and its all in my head. That im just lazy and using the system to my advantage. There is more where that came from but i do feel your pain. I hate not knowing why im feeling or doing whatever it is until its too late.

 

[borderlinealcoholic]

its horrific. and so isolating knowing that the vast majority of people will never understand

the way we feel so alone its truly cruel

I think I might have this along with OCD but never been diagnosed because I'm afraid to be honest with therapists.

I feel you, but just know if you´re honest (and i know that might be hard ) they´ll know how to help you way better! Just allow yourself slowly

I think the problem is that most people don't want to understand, so they don't try to.

most ppl have 0 empathy I feel like I dont belong here

I just got diagnosed with bpd in the looney bin. They agreed with me that bipolar II was a misdiagnosis and that I was over-medicated and duped. I do have comorbid reoccurring major depressive disorder however.

Reading the Wikipedia page that lists mostly murders and serial killers as having bpd was disheartening. Being a murderer is my biggest fear. Having this diagnosis on file stings like hell in all of its antagonizing, stigmatizing glory.

I just remind myself of my bpd heros. Sylvia Plath, Edward Munch, and Sinéad 'O Connor were beautiful, holy, creative sirens. I feel so deeply and strongly and the trick is making this reactivity an uplifting blessing rather than a self-sabotaging curse.

Amy Winehouse, Marilyn Monroe, Princess Diana! most of murderers who have bpd are also sociopaths or psychopats.

I dont have bpd but i have bipolar 1 and i can understand how you feel that no one understands. My life is in shambles because of it and the people who i hold closest tell me nothings wrong with me and its all in my head. That im just lazy and using the system to my advantage. There is more where that came from but i do feel your pain. I hate not knowing why im feeling or doing whatever it is until its too late.

you should tell them like what advantage??? do you seriously think I enjoy feeling like this?

 

[vaspertine]

i've been medicated/maybe misdiagnosed for BPD but now they just think I have premenstrual dysphoric disorder and i'm going through diagnoses right now but all i can say is that having horrific mood swings, feeling nihilistic and pushing away from others constantly and sudden and intense thoughts of death is no way to live a life, so in that respect i can absolutely relate.

the thing that worries me the most is if i actually want to die or if my mental illness is the thing that is tricking me into thinking i want to die. it's hard.

 

[Cloud Busting]

I feel you, but just know if you´re honest (and i know that might be hard ) they´ll know how to help you way better! Just allow yourself slowly

I finally told the truth about my intrusive thoughts because I was already locked up so why not. I'm already fucked and have this on my record. Well they didn't think I was crazy or a murderer or a sociopath or schizo. It was nice.

Tho I'd be a bit more cautious as not everyone is as lucky. Ableism is horrible and rampant in mental health care. Especially for bpd people.

Amy Winehouse, Marilyn Monroe, Princess Diana! most of murderers who have bpd are also sociopaths or psychopats.

Thank you for more to add to the list. I'd like to mention Susana Kaysen as well.

I always felt so bad for how Amy was lambasted in the media.

Ugh seeing murderers with bpd just scares me cuz I have ocd too so I worry I'm a psychopathic and will snap and kill people and that Wikipedia page doesn't help with that.

the thing that worries me the most is if i actually want to die or if my mental illness is the thing that is tricking me into thinking i want to die. it's hard.

I feel this so strongly

 

[tora]

I completely agree :( I honestly don't think it's possible for someone with BPD to live a long happy life. it feels like such a curse. I just finished writing my note and made sure my family is aware my BPD is a huge reason why I'm gonna CTB :(

 

[dumblosergirl]

I seriously can't handle it anymore.

 

[Tulip<3]

I know. It's a very painful, heavy thing to live with. Sending love to all my BPD people here

for me, things did improve and I was able to live happier and with things less intense, but it took the right medication and a LOT of therapy. (BPD isn't why I'm here right now, but a few years ago it put me in a very very dark place)

 

[ger3172]

i rlly cant do this anymore, i feel so alone and idk what is wrong with me, what i did to deserve such pain, while everyone else gets love and care. im so tired

 

[Minsu]

I feel for you guys it seems like one of the most destructive mental illnesses

 

[inmyhead]

It's so lonely feeling this chronic emptiness. I would rather be alone than put myself in the position of being abandoned. I hate BPD. Can't live like this much longer

 

[borderlinealcoholic]

I finally told the truth about my intrusive thoughts because I was already locked up so why not. I'm already fucked and have this on my record. Well they didn't think I was crazy or a murderer or a sociopath or schizo. It was nice.

Tho I'd be a bit more cautious as not everyone is as lucky. Ableism is horrible and rampant in mental health care. Especially for bpd people.


Thank you for more to add to the list. I'd like to mention Susana Kaysen as well.

I always felt so bad for how Amy was lambasted in the media.

Ugh seeing murderers with bpd just scares me cuz I have ocd too so I worry I'm a psychopathic and will snap and kill people and that Wikipedia page doesn't help with that.



I feel this so strongly

I think us that have bpd have way more chances of hurting ourselves than of hurting anyone else around us. dw about that. wikipedia says a lot of BS! Im sure you're really kind and empathetic. send you lots of love!

I completely agree :( I honestly don't think it's possible for someone with BPD to live a long happy life. it feels like such a curse. I just finished writing my note and made sure my family is aware my BPD is a huge reason why I'm gonna CTB :(

Same here! sending lots of love your way feel free to message me anytime.

I seriously can't handle it anymore.

It sucks sm man I just I feel so damn happy or so damn sad or so damn lost and Im just tired of fighting all of this

I know. It's a very painful, heavy thing to live with. Sending love to all my BPD people here

for me, things did improve and I was able to live happier and with things less intense, but it took the right medication and a LOT of therapy. (BPD isn't why I'm here right now, but a few years ago it put me in a very very dark place)

thank you! send you lots of love

i rlly cant do this anymore, i feel so alone and idk what is wrong with me, what i did to deserve such pain, while everyone else gets love and care. im so tired

I think this all the time like im such a loving person, i used to be so happy, I do so much for others, Im not selfish I literally try to be the best version of myself everyday man. my friends literally say that its wild that i go through all this and im still there for everyone 24/7. Who's here for me tho

I feel for you guys it seems like one of the most destructive mental illnesses

thanks for the love! Its very tiring indeed

It's so lonely feeling this chronic emptiness. I would rather be alone than put myself in the position of being abandoned. I hate BPD. Can't live like this much longer

I dont think ive ever felt this alone in my entire life as in like the past 5 years. Its fucking scary.

 

[exiled]

Literally the biggest challenge of my life. Everyone says "mental health matters" and is all for suicide prevention until someone with BPD comes along.... all understanding goes out the window. Most stigmatized disorder. People really do not care and this is my biggest issue with pro-lifers.

 

[Worndown]

BPD does not need to be the end. No cure, but there are medications that can at least take the edge off. They are NOT perfect, but are a viable option.

 

[exiled]

BPD does not need to be the end. No cure, but there are medications that can at least take the edge off. They are NOT perfect, but are a viable option.

I know that there are medications out there as well as therapy, but at the end of the day, it isn't JUST the disorder that is hard. It is the stigma around it as well. There is so much support for depression, anxiety, even panic disorders. But personality disorders are seen as evil, criminal, automatic "insanity" and even so far as demon possession. Healing is hard enough without all that stigma, but having to fight that in the real world on top of the everyday struggles of BPD is exhausting. I would not wish this on my worst enemy.

 

[Worndown]

I do not doubt it. My ex was untreated bpd. She was always tired and worked 10 times as hard just to be relatively normal. Reducing that a little sounds like a viable option.