Have any of you considered just leaving your life instead of CTB?

[SleepingLessons]

I guess I was just wondering if any of you have just considered up and leaving as an alternative to CTB, for example leaving to another place or country, travelling around, or anything else similar. For me there's always been the urge or temptation to just disappear, and I know that logically it's no worse than CTB. But at the same time it comes with a lot of fear - it feels like if I'm going to choose life then I'm still bound by the responsibilities and burdens and I should either kill myself or learn to deal with them. Logically this just doesn't seem to hold up though.

So I guess I was just wondering if any of you have had similar thoughts and feelings, and what your views are?

 

[m1v]

hihi, I've had similar thoughts honestly. I consider 'leaving everything behind' an attempt to recover, a risky one. Because leaving everything behind comes with consequences and complications that's for sure. Like you said, I think it can also be viewed as an alternative to ctb. Since if 'leaving' makes your life worst, there's going to be another (even more) valid reason to actually leave this world for real. If that made sense lol

This action will probably have a big impact on my life (positively or negatively) This would be a tie-breaker on wether I should live or leave. Much love, thanks for sharing your thoughts!

 

[Dead Ghost]

Years ago, it's the best way to learn to live for yourself without depending on others. But at the moment I don't have the energy, the work capacity, or the finances to do it... it's almost impossible, otherwise I'd be here.

//

Fa anys si, és la millor manera d'aprendre a viure per tu mateix sense dependre dels altres. Però actualment no tinc ni energía, ni capacitat laboral, ni económica per fer-ho... és gairebé impossible, sino aquí estaría jo.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

No I wouldn't want that, one of my biggest regrets was actually not completing ctb in 2018…. I have to complete ctb this time around…

 

[TimetoGo!]

I guess I was just wondering if any of you have just considered up and leaving as an alternative to CTB, for example leaving to another place or country, travelling around, or anything else similar. For me there's always been the urge or temptation to just disappear, and I know that logically it's no worse than CTB. But at the same time it comes with a lot of fear - it feels like if I'm going to choose life then I'm still bound by the responsibilities and burdens and I should either kill myself or learn to deal with them. Logically this just doesn't seem to hold up though.

So I guess I was just wondering if any of you have had similar thoughts and feelings, and what your views are?

wish I could, and I know it would be to leave.........money stops everything!! Id love to go and work in Dubai

trapped in this life!!

 

[Vizzy]

wish I could, and I know it would be to leave.........money stops everything!! Id love to go and work in Dubai

trapped in this life!!

You from some Asian countries?

 

[TimetoGo!]

You from some Asian countries?

no, UK.

 

[Meatshell]

Yeah, I was even considering becoming a homeless just to get outta here, because I feel stuck here. Like you said, it's logically worse.

But it's not that. Life itself is tough - everywhere. I've been suicidal since the day I was born and I've had a pretty decent childhood. A better life wouldn't change anything, it'd just help pass the time till I get to escape my existance. At the end of the day, we're all in this world trying to find a way to pass the time in the best way possible.

Secondly, when you're so low the climb all the way up to a point where life is somewhat bearable is practically impossible. When you don't see any other way, the exit sign becomes your only destination. Seems more realistic.

 

[TheAntithesis]

Yes, actually. I feel if I had the nessecary things to do so, I would have already. Moving across the country, away from all the people that know, judge, and scrutinize me, to somewhere new, full of new people, the idea of a new reputation, having my sins be unable to chase me, or at the very least weaken their grip on me sounds very appealing.

 

[TAW122]

Yeah, I was even considering becoming a homeless just to get outta here, because I feel stuck here. Like you said, it's logically worse.

But it's not that. Life itself is tough - everywhere. I've been suicidal since the day I was born and I've had a pretty decent childhood. A better life wouldn't change anything, it'd just help pass the time till I get to escape my existance. At the end of the day, we're all in this world trying to find a way to pass the time in the best way possible.

Secondly, when you're so low the climb all the way up to a point where life is somewhat bearable is practically impossible. When you don't see any other way, the exit sign becomes your only destination. Seems more realistic.

Good post, and while my life (objectively speaking) isn't the worst when it comes to having basic needs and all, it still sucks and not having the "option" of being able to leave on my own terms without intervention, interference, shame, and other consequences is not a world or society that I wish to be a part of. There are times where I wanted to leave my life behind, but at the end, I ultimately want permanent rest and peace on my own terms.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

Yes, actually. I feel if I had the nessecary things to do so, I would have already. Moving across the country, away from all the people that know, judge, and scrutinize me, to somewhere new, full of new people, the idea of a new reputation, having my sins be unable to chase me, or at the very least weaken their grip on me sounds very appealing.

Most of these people that will be criticising you might even have a lot of skeletons in their closets themselves… looool …. At the end of the day you can choose your own destiny by completing ctb… death is for everyone and no will escape it even those who thinks that they are untouchable… Death is for everyone and no one knows when they will die either but for me I know when I will because I choose to be the writer of my own ending… CTB for the win!

 

[TheAntithesis]

Most of these people that will be criticising you might even have a lot of skeletons in their closets themselves… looool …. At the end of the day you can choose your own destiny by completing ctb… death is for everyone and no will escape it even those who thinks that they are untouchable… Death is for everyone and no one knows when they will die either but for me I know when I will because I choose to be the writer of my own ending… CTB for the win!

I agree, people all have their skeletons, but most of the time it will never stop them from being judgemental hypocrites, but it doesn't matter. As long as their lives are orderly, or not on the verge of complete collapse, they feel as if they can do whatever they please.

Humanity for the most part, need to experience pain before they change. Arrogance, hypocrisy and judgement can only be dispelled by pain and loss. But most people are unfortunately above consequences. Some are meant to bear the burden of the consequences of others.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

I agree, people all have their skeletons, but most of the time it will never stop them from being judgemental hypocrites, but it doesn't matter. As long as their lives are orderly, or not on the verge of complete collapse, they feel as if they can do whatever they please.

Humanity for the most part, need to experience pain before they change. Arrogance, hypocrisy and judgement can only be dispelled by pain and loss. But most people are unfortunately above consequences. Some are meant to bear the burden of the consequences of others.

Most of these people they will be saying these bad things but they tend to forget that when they needed something they will be "begging" you like oh there is no one else to help me but you…and most of these people judging you would be judging each other as well behind each other's back. All I can do is laugh because I know what they used to say about each other to me… I won't miss any part of it, I came alone and I will die alone. Death doesn't come in packs ( that's a fact)….

 

[TheAntithesis]

Death doesn't come in packs

I enjoy this. You have a way with words that I admire.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

I enjoy this. You have a way with words that I admire.

That would be their biggest accomplishment to date….

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Wherever you are, there you go.

 

[SleepingLessons]

Wherever you are, there you go.

Honestly this is a fantastic point. It's easy to believe that things will be better, but in the end I guess for some of us our mental health issues are the root of our problems, and you can't escape those by running away.

 

[Dead Ghost]

Honestly this is a fantastic point. It's easy to believe that things will be better, but in the end I guess for some of us our mental health issues are the root of our problems, and you can't escape those by running away.

It's not so much about running away as it is about generating new opportunities for you to get new points of view to solve the problems you carry.
//
No es tracta pas tant de fugir com si de generar-te noves oportunitats d'obtenir nous punt de vista per resoldre els problemes que portis a sobre.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

For me personally nothing would change, even if I moved to another country. I did that decades ago when my life was worth to be lived. Yes I would like to travel the world, that was what I worked for since I left school, but this dream has been destroyed due to many failures in the past years, and that is my unsolvable problem.

Anyway this could be a solution for the one or the other but generally for each indivicual there is only an indivdual solution so solve our poblems.

 

[jorheslen428]

I've left my life and completely changed my environment, friends, work, everything, at least 3-4 times with no meaningful long lasting changes. The change seems nice at first for maybe a month or two but then it's just the same old routine.

 

[ikadasui]

Nowhere to go after all I'm me and that's what I want out from

 

[absolomonisgone]

I guess I was just wondering if any of you have just considered up and leaving as an alternative to CTB, for example leaving to another place or country, travelling around, or anything else similar. For me there's always been the urge or temptation to just disappear, and I know that logically it's no worse than CTB. But at the same time it comes with a lot of fear - it feels like if I'm going to choose life then I'm still bound by the responsibilities and burdens and I should either kill myself or learn to deal with them. Logically this just doesn't seem to hold up though.

So I guess I was just wondering if any of you have had similar thoughts and feelings, and what your views are?

get drunk. listen to loud music. 90s music when they used to sing

 

[crimsonpool]

I guess I was just wondering if any of you have just considered up and leaving as an alternative to CTB, for example leaving to another place or country, travelling around, or anything else similar. For me there's always been the urge or temptation to just disappear, and I know that logically it's no worse than CTB. But at the same time it comes with a lot of fear - it feels like if I'm going to choose life then I'm still bound by the responsibilities and burdens and I should either kill myself or learn to deal with them. Logically this just doesn't seem to hold up though.

So I guess I was just wondering if any of you have had similar thoughts and feelings, and what your views are?

i would love to do that if i was able but with my circumstances its just not possible. but doing that would probably solve my problems as much as ctb, i would disappear without a trace if i could

 

[absolomonisgone]

I guess I was just wondering if any of you have just considered up and leaving as an alternative to CTB, for example leaving to another place or country, travelling around, or anything else similar. For me there's always been the urge or temptation to just disappear, and I know that logically it's no worse than CTB. But at the same time it comes with a lot of fear - it feels like if I'm going to choose life then I'm still bound by the responsibilities and burdens and I should either kill myself or learn to deal with them. Logically this just doesn't seem to hold up though.

So I guess I was just wondering if any of you have had similar thoughts and feelings, and what your views are?

as the chinese say....wherever you go, there you are.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Problem is, my body remains mine so I can't just abandon the issues that make me want to CTB.

 

[Twiceler]

If I did this in my teen age - maybe it worked, but now it's too late. I should have been dead in 14yo, but now I'm in my twenties.
Everything I do since 14 is postponing my ctb letting my life go worse and worse gradually. Nothing has changed my mind in my 14-18, so since then my convictions got only strengthened.

 

[Is it still me?]

I guess I was just wondering if any of you have just considered up and leaving as an alternative to CTB, for example leaving to another place or country, travelling around, or anything else similar. For me there's always been the urge or temptation to just disappear, and I know that logically it's no worse than CTB. But at the same time it comes with a lot of fear - it feels like if I'm going to choose life then I'm still bound by the responsibilities and burdens and I should either kill myself or learn to deal with them. Logically this just doesn't seem to hold up though.

So I guess I was just wondering if any of you have had similar thoughts and feelings, and what your views are?

Hi. I believe I have a saying in this, because I did it.

I moved out of my country and cut complete contact with all people in my past.

I got married, went to therapy, did everything I thought I had to do. The catch is: the past doesn't disappear like that. In a way, you'll always be stuck in it.

If you want to Ctb because something is going wrong right now, in a way that just starting over somewhere else would solve it, than I would advise you to reconsider your priorities.
If you're considering just because somethings are wrong now and then, then just face your problems.

However all of us know that no one considers this kind of thing if that's all thats going on. If you're already considering Ctb'ing, then there are deeper layers to it. And if you're already at that point then chances are that starting new is not gonna do much for you.

I don't believe in point of no return as long as you're patient and resilient enough.
The question is if you are willing to go through it. As much as "I'm beyond fixing" doesn't exist, it might be very very far. So far that you can't see it and you might die of a different cause before you get there even.
People have to be aware of that.

Yes, it is easier to heal if you get away from what destroys you, but that doesn't mean it'll be fast.
You just have to understand if you think its worth going through the healing process.

A lot have changed since I started making decisions in life based on priorities.
You just have to get them corrected, just know what holds more importance to you.

 

[absolomonisgone]

...as the chinese say....., wherever you go, there you are. ..wherever you go, there you are.

 

[TapeMachine]

That's what my plan has been of late- to leave my present life- but it just doesn't feel like I'll ever get out of this miserable house. I get excited some days, but then I start to feel discouraged and trapped again a few days later.

No matter where I go, I'll still have to face many of the same issues. I know better than to think that my brain will suddenly morph into a perfect specimen just because I've relocated my body to a new home.

But I don't know, I figure I can always ctb later if I need to; so why not give something new a try? It's just difficult to stay positive when it feels like progress isn't really being made. I'm probably just too impatient.

 

[Kerrtu]

Many times.

Though I realize I'll likely feel in my heart how I feel every day, no matter the location.