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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,163
I've been seeing a therapist for half a year and.... she hasn't helped me at all.
To sum up, every session is like:

"How are you today? How do you feel? What are you thinking of? What will you do next week?"

And that's it. She doesn't ask anything else. Anyway, I have no choice but to lie to her. If I told her "Well, I'm feeling suicidal, I'm thinking about ctb and I will ctb next week" she'd probably send me to a psych ward.

I wish I didn't have to attend therapy but, because of my failed attempt, they're forcing me to do it.

Can anyone relate? Has therapy really helped you? I feel no one can understand me, especially therapists.
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
21,378
Therapy has helped me clear up some things about my past. I've been able to not feel burdened by my dad as long as I stay away from him and maintain no contact. Other minor things such as when I've felt upset at things happening to me were also solved by therapy. Maybe it works on me because I'm an idiot who knows.

Usually when it comes to anything significant though therapy can't do anything for me. Sometimes during the sessions I've felt clear on what I had to do but like any homework I'm given I end up putting it off as soon as it's over and then I'm way less enthusiastic and I'm back to square one. Ultimately my current issues are probably therapy-proof. There's nothing a therapist can actually do to make me like myself or for some woman I'd fancy to just waltz into my life. That's why I'm gonna CTB anyway.
 
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kolski

kolski

ᴡᴇ ᴀʀᴇ ᴍᴏɴsᴛᴇʀs
May 27, 2019
115
Therapy never worked for me either. After being on a waiting list for nearly 2 years, the women I got was just horrible. I only managed to stay in it 4 months (once a week), but I felt worse after each session. She always made me feel like I was wasting her time n that I didn't actually need help at all. I guess for some ppl it can help but it wasn't for me.
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,163
Therapy never worked for me either. After being on a waiting list for nearly 2 years, the women I got was just horrible. I only went managed to stay in it 4 months (once a week), but I felt worse after each session. She always made me feel like I was wasting her time n that I didn't actually need help at all. I guess for some ppl it can help but it wasn't for me.
I feel so like this! "I'm wasting her time I guess..."
That's what I always think!
 
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Deleted member 22624

Deleted member 22624

One foot in the grave
Oct 7, 2020
1,085
. There's nothing a therapist can actually do to make me like myself or for some woman I'd fancy to just waltz into my life.
I wish a guy like in Hitch existed to help. He'd prob just hit you with a lot of platitudes mostly lol. But you sound like you'd be a good man for some woman, if that's all it will take to make you happy, it wouldn't need much more than patience and just doing a little bit of living to eventually meet someone.

No, therapy never worked for me. I always got stuck on some point or just refused to do the exercises out of anxiety/depression/avoidance
 
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signifying nothing

signifying nothing

-
Sep 13, 2020
2,553
When I was doing talking therapy, I got to choose what we talked about rather than the therapist asking standard questions. You should be able to choose what you talk about. Or sit in silence if that's what you want to do.

Also, do you trust your therapist? If not then its not going to be very helpful as you won't be able to talk about the things you really want to talk about.
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,163
When I was doing talking therapy, I got to choose what we talked about rather than the therapist asking standard questions. You should be able to choose what you talk about. Or sit in silence if that's what you want to do.

Also, do you trust your therapist? If not then its not going to be very helpful as you won't be able to talk about the things you really want to talk about.

That sounds better than the hell I'm going through. She only asks those standard questions. Anyway, would I have the guts to talk about ctb? I think they'd send me to a psych ward immediately lol
 
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yive

yive

life is evil
Nov 6, 2020
695
FORTUNATELY, i never attended therapy. i hope my attempt will be successful, because i really hate life/suffering/psychiatry/brainwashing/pro-psychiatry/pro-life beliefs etc.
also, i do not consider myself mentally ill and i just think that life is shit. cruelty and injustice
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,163
FORTUNATELY, i never attended therapy. i hope my attempt will be successful, because i really hate life/suffering/psychiatry/brainwashing/pro-psychiatry/pro-life beliefs etc.
also, i do not consider myself mentally ill and i just think that life is shit. cruelty and injustice

You're goddamn right. Therapy, at least for me, never helps. It's just some pro-life bullsh*t
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
21,378
I wish a guy like in Hitch existed to help. He'd prob just hit you with a lot of platitudes mostly lol. But you sound like you'd be a good man for some woman, if that's all it will take to make you happy, it wouldn't need much more than patience and just doing a little bit of living to eventually meet someone.
I remember that movie! Though I never actually watched it. Funny enough that's similar to what my previous therapist said. She inspired me to go sign up for as many apps as I could find though I've had practically zero success in all of them. When it came to my troubles with the most recent woman, she urged me to make efforts to reach out to her even though I've been met with silence.

I don't know, objectively speaking maybe there's really stuff about me but I'm also pretty selective too much for my own good. I definitely couldn't mentally afford a divorce or anything like that, it would ruin me even more. I think that unless the optimal partner throws herself at me I'm doomed. My recent experience showed me that I just can't get over how icky I feel when trying to approach strangers with romantic intent so my standards would have to include someone who reaches out to me first. I'm stuck waiting but I feel like I've waited almost long enough being almost 27 with zero relationship experience.....
 
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F

fly away

It’s enough
Oct 28, 2020
110
I talk about wanting to die in therapy constantly. I just start each session by saying I have no plans to kill myself, I do not have the means or method. Obviously I'm lying. I just learned what not to say and what not to admit to.
 
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Deleted member 22624

Deleted member 22624

One foot in the grave
Oct 7, 2020
1,085
how icky I feel when trying to approach strangers with romantic intent
I know how you feel. I think it's just a state of mind for that bit at least, when you see confident guys "get in there" they're not really thinking so much about romantic intent, I think that just happens automatically when chemistry is right as a result of just playfulness of varying styles
 
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signifying nothing

signifying nothing

-
Sep 13, 2020
2,553
That sounds better than the hell I'm going through. She only asks those standard questions. Anyway, would I have the guts to talk about ctb? I think they'd send me to a psych ward immediately lol
I talked about suicide with mine in a theoretical sense and she was fine with that - she's an existential therapist, so they like talking about death, free will, self determination, etc. Which is why I picked her really.
 
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EmbraceOfTheVoid

EmbraceOfTheVoid

Part Time NEET - Full Time Suicidal
Mar 29, 2020
689
When I was doing talking therapy, I got to choose what we talked about rather than the therapist asking standard questions. You should be able to choose what you talk about. Or sit in silence if that's what you want to do.

Also, do you trust your therapist? If not then its not going to be very helpful as you won't be able to talk about the things you really want to talk about.

You can't trust someone that instills fear into you and will subject you to torture for the sake of their license and misguided sense of morality. They aren't all like that of course, but the ones with a good moral compass are in the extreme minority.

I agree that the client should be driving discussion though.

I only found therapy to be a waste of time or alienating. Most therapists are only useful if you just need to talk about thoughts and feelings; and they range anywhere from downright ignorant to completely harmful. If you're traumatized a lot of them will waste years of your time trying to establish a fictional relationship with you to "heal" and reestablish trust despite it only being loosely based on money and you not bringing up suicide.

"Will the therapist (despite the fact that not even a single provider in my area has a slide scale pay program for extremely low income people like me and even a coworker i know who got hurt on the job is still financially broken by medical bills even with health insurance which did not pay enough) ignore the inability of a person to afford their expensive service?

Will the therapist change the economy to stop poverty wages/unaffordable housing/unsustainably high rent/boring miserable shit jobs/unsustainably long work hours/work and school stress/political and economic and social issues that divide people and cause constant conflict and isolation and loneliness?/etc

Why recommend a therapist or try to fix people if after therapy people will just be thrown back into the same situation that destroys them again?

A therapist may be helpful for people who literally just want/need to talk about feelings, but it does nothing for people whose lives are being destroyed by situational stressors and a variety of political/economic issues that neither the therapist or the person can control."
-Suicidal stranger from the internet

"Yes, most therapists must receive post-graduate education and certification. The education they receive is functionally like that of a priest; e.g. they are taught to view things through a very particular scope - whereas the priest is taught the lens of their particular religion, the therapist-to-be is taught the lens of contemporary psychology and its endless pathologies. Therapy in-and-of itself, is like a confessional in a church, the therapist is the priest and the patient the confessor. The patient confesses their worries and problems much like a would-be blasphemer would confess their "sins".

The sad thing is, "just put your head in the sand" is probably a pretty common response to the OPs concerns not only at mental health resources across the world, but from peers and colleagues; the patient lives in a world where being open about such things in the dehumanized, hyperindividualized public sphere typically only invites scrutiny and further alienation (likely from individuals who are just as alienated and scared as them), which increases their reliance on the therapist as much as it increases their sense of cognitive dissonance, as though they are caught between two realities in a depersonalized limbo. Of course, there's only the one reality as far as we know, but to this patient their inner world has become an enigma and its workings thoroughly mystified by an industry that portends one must go through many years of schooling and certification before they can make sense of the human mind; which is as absurd and circular claim to make as "God works in mysterious ways." - as if that explains why your toaster catching on fire this morning and the delay that caused made you miss your train commute derailing, killing everyone on board. Likewise, it is just as circular to tell someone they have a disease called "depression", which can only be treated by "trained professionals" - trained, of course, in "psychology", an invention of the human mind as much as the phrase "mental illness" with all it's implicit meanings. But the backbone of the entire practice is to be a truthclaim, much like any religion - they suppose "mental illness" to be as sacrosanct as religions hold their Gods; that is, as self-evident and infallible as a physicist would consider thermodynamics.

Perhaps it would be too radical to admit "depression" is an entirely normal reaction to a world in which one exists as a dehumanized, chronically hollowed-out wage slave whose life has been reduced to a series of empty, mindless labor and emptier consumption rituals, comforted only by addictive drugs pushed on them at every turn, and vacuous social ties of similarly hollowed out wageslaves who only know how to monologue and compete; who breathes, eats and shits microplastic, pollution and pesticides, and can't remember the last time they felt somebody actually cared if they lived or died. It'd be far too radical to admit we're living through the slow-motion collapse of the living super organism we call 'civilization' and every case of "depression" is like one little support column showing signs of giving out under the weight of a monstrosity that has become too bloated and labyrinthine for its own good. Then we'd be engaging in reality, giving the "illness" the scope it deserves, and psychology cares not for this.

The reality is, contemporary psychology functions much like a religion or a cult does, in that what one receives from it depends very much on what one puts into it - the power wielded by such organizations are directly correlate to belief of their followers. This is the power of placebo, confirmation bias, and magical thinking. If one considers their reaction to, say, climate change to be "abnormal", they merely have to walk into a therapist's office and their belief will be confirmed - their conscious experience will become a list of "symptoms" of "illness", for which they'll receive "medication". The words, the labels, the pills, they're all momentarily comforting, but none actually deal with the original problem any more than popping an Aspirin cures a raging influenza infection. That's because the entire "mental health industry" is palliative at best - worse yet, it serves at the behest of the state, which benefits massively from an industry that teaches individuals to view their life's problems through a scope that is not only decidedly apolitical but atomized as well.

Take an issue like climate change and this scope fails almost entirely - its sufficiently large-scale enough that the therapist's individualizing lens has no real answer to it. One who is trained in end-of-life therapy may have some more substantial answers that verge into decidedly philosophical territory, but most "by the book" therapists will preach willful ignorance; their role is not to create independent-thinking individuals, community leaders, politically-minded citizens or would-be revolutionaries, because they don't operate in this paradigm; an office vending machine is more communalistic than a therapist's office could ever claim to be. No, their role is to keep people complicit and complacent in the consume/work false dichotomy lifestyle for they are part of the very same paradigm, this being their work as much as preaching is a priests'. The "mental health" industry is obliged to meet the absurdity of the world it exists in and profits off of, and so existential terror becomes "eco-anxiety", another cutesy label which can be "treated" with the right combination of benzodiazepines and willful ignorance, just as a village witch doctor may have once treated "spiritual possession" with a concoction of ayahuasca and a ceremony. Now this ceremony only takes 45 minutes and $200 a week and a monthly trip to the pharmacy. Who ever said capitalism wasn't efficient?!"
--Stranger from the internet
 
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Water-Lily

Water-Lily

Enlightened
Dec 26, 2020
1,203
My therapist is sort of a friend. Like she makes it clear she really wants to help me. And that she knows she isnt perfect and wants me to communicate if she ever upset me in any way
 
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stygal

stygal

meow
Oct 29, 2020
1,731
You pretty much summed up the experience I had with my therapist.
We pretty much only talked about my daily life or my educational plans since I started it in a time where I wasn't sure what to do with my degree but that wasn't a thing that actually worried me too much. My physical disability and mental problems (because of lots of stuff that happened to me in the past) never really got addressed. I once made a statement that people traumatized me and her stance was "to forgive and move forward" as if that was such an easy thing to do.

Plus she made me feel even shittier because one time I said: If I some day lose the ability to walk entirely (which will happen) maybe I could get an automatic wheelchair and just accept my faith.

She was like: Oh, you should rather work on walking until the end otherwise you'll just give up and get more depressed. Besides driving around in a wheelchair can never beat being able to walk.
Ahhhm thanks - what a bitch.
 
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Amumu

Amumu

Ctb - temporary solution for a permanent problem
Aug 29, 2020
2,623
Completely useless for me tbh
Meds helped a little bit and that's it
 
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Nymph

Nymph

he/him
Jul 15, 2020
2,564
Part of my therapy were meds, some of them helped, some didn't and some made me worse. I'm on a few meds rn and I guess it's better with them than without. I also get benzos, which are probably the best of them all even tho I'm just meant to take them for panic attacks. But they really calm me down when I'm having some REALLY bad thoughts.

the talking part was nice because I could at least tell someone my issues but i was never really helped. I always got some advice but it was like "try to interact with your friends more" "go out and exercise" or whatever...but I don't want to do those things because I have anxiety and depression.. I feel like I know what each therapist is gonna say as "advice" and therefore it's meaningless. I don't want to do the advice because my illenesses are limiting me and I really don't feel like pushing my boundaries or whatever.
 
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S

SuicidallyCurious

Enlightened
Dec 20, 2020
1,715
I found it helpful in a previous time. Today I do not think it would be helpful
 
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whywere

Illuminated
Jun 26, 2020
3,281
NO. It has never done anything for me except to pay alot of money, that I do not have, to be told advice that was nothing more than "professional" much ado about nothing. The last place wanted me to do a year long group deal and when I said I would have to think about it, I got booted out. Have NOT been to another since. In my experience it is all about the MONEY!!!
 
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Rockman

Rockman

Experienced
Feb 9, 2020
210
I was forced to therapy and i attepted first time after few meetings. Then they send me to psych ward first time. Help nothing at all, make all worse.
 
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sweater

sweater

tired of it all
Dec 23, 2020
27
I've done therapy on and off for about 10 years or more at this point.

it has never helped. I have never had a therapist that actually listened or gave me good advice or helped at all.

I had one therapist that I started seeing for gender dysphoria and he told me I was just a confused lesbian.

I DID get some help after I was hospitalized for an attempt. After hospitalization they had me do a partial hospital program where I spent 8 hours a day for 2 weeks doing cbt skills in group sessions. Some of the cbt stuff helped calm my emotions at that time and reorient myself into my life. But like, here I am a year later, so did it really help lol
 
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sadbadpsychogirl

sadbadpsychogirl

sonofabitch
May 29, 2020
725
i tried therapy a few years ago. once i told her one of my goals was to get housing, she then replied with "what if theres a burgular" i told her i was prepared for that. then she said (totally serious) "what if the toilet clogs"? i was speechless, then i told her i've fixed enough toilets in my day. so really all i got out of therapy was a good laugh..
 
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JayDog

JayDog

Member
Jan 3, 2021
18
Went to therapists during early teenage years - no help at all. In fact, the older I am the more I think therapists are completely useless.
 
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S

Scotty

Student
Dec 26, 2020
136
It really depends on the therapist. I have had one good one out of maybe 20. I had one recently that was the worst. Really bad. I'm planning on writing him a delayed negative email about his cause in my cbt. Most people should not be therapist and this guy needs to stop hurting people. I also emailed or called another 15 saying that I need help and only one responded back saying that he was too busy and can't help. So even if I wanted a therapist I couldn't get one. Shity system.
 
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M

mf25748

Member
Jan 4, 2021
8
Wow I am gonna start therapy this Friday and...that really didn't help. Any tip on how I can make this work, because I constantly want to cbt but that would be horrible for my mom. Especially after I told her the reason was because she neglected me completely and made fun of my problems with her friends
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,163
Wow I am gonna start therapy this Friday and...that really didn't help. Any tip on how I can make this work, because I constantly want to cbt but that would be horrible for my mom. Especially after I told her the reason was because she neglected me completely and made fun of my problems with her friends
Well, there are some people who commented positive experiences with therapists so, you might be lucky and therapy may help you!
 
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A

alice-in-wonderland

Member
Nov 20, 2020
31
Therapy helped me superficially some years ago. He listened to me without judging or shoving my words down my throat like it happens in dysfunctional families when you want to express yourself and your needs. But this therapy touched just the tip of an iceberg and we never reached the actual iceberg. I couldn't keep financing my therapy + he passed away.
P.S. I recommend this book https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/4887.The_Drama_of_the_Gifted_Child
 
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S

Scotty

Student
Dec 26, 2020
136
Wow I am gonna start therapy this Friday and...that really didn't help. Any tip on how I can make this work, because I constantly want to cbt but that would be horrible for my mom. Especially after I told her the reason was because she neglected me completely and made fun of my problems with her friends
If you don't find someone that you connect with, moved n and try to find someone that you do. There are only a few good ones out there, but when you find one it is worth it.
 
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