Help has anyone ran into people being scared of your suicidal thoughts?

[catsrprettycuteman]

am I the only one who thinks it's confusing why people get scared or uneasy from suicidal thoughts?

tried opening up about it but I feel like my feeling are just treated like a problem or something that you just wanna avoid talking about at all costs. I think it's weird, I'm only asking to be supported tbh.
I don't like speaking about my suicidal thoughts because of it, so that's what made me come here for some like minded people yknow.

anyways has this happened to you or just me?

 

[penguinl0v3s]

Yesss, so much. People were terrified of them. But I thought of those thoughts as friends. I got annoyed when people wanted me to stop having them. I didn't see it as a problem, so it's weird when people call them "those thoughts" as if they were wrong thoughts to have, when honestly they were just realistic. I only speak of them here, because people won't find it weird.

Suicidal thoughts can only be considered bad if people are anti-suicide. (Making the distinction here between suicidal thoughts and depression, you can have them separately.)

 

[catsrprettycuteman]

Yesss, so much. People were terrified of them. But I thought of those thoughts as friends. I got annoyed when people wanted me to stop having them. I didn't see it as a problem, so it's weird when people call them "those thoughts" as if they were wrong thoughts to have, when honestly they were just realistic. I only speak of them here, because people won't find it weird.

Suicidal thoughts can only be considered bad if people are anti-suicide. (Making the distinction here between suicidal thoughts and depression, you can have them separately.)

I genuinely don't understand anti suicide people, I feel like nobody should be forced to live if they're in constant suffering yk.
actually confuses me, I'm glad that other people have the same experience though, I hate being treated like oh my actual feelings are "bad" and I'm doing something wrong for feeling this way, signing up for this site was the best thing I did for my mental health tbh. And I love hearing about other people's stories and problems. I'm glad others can find refuge here too :D

 

[penguinl0v3s]

I genuinely don't understand anti suicide people, I feel like nobody should be forced to live if they're in constant suffering yk.
actually confuses me, I'm glad that other people have the same experience though, I hate being treated like oh my actual feelings are "bad" and I'm doing something wrong for feeling this way, signing up for this site was the best thing I did for my mental health tbh. And I love hearing about other people's stories and problems. I'm glad others can find refuge here too :D

I don't believe anyone has to justify death, just like nobody had to justify life. We were brought into it without having to be given a justification after all. I think people don't want others to kill themselves because it hurts other people, and that suffering is temporary, but I honestly feel like this approach is wrong and that we should encourage those that are alive to be happy for those that have made decisions to be happier.

Do you wanna share your story? I'd totally be down to listen.

 

[peanutbutteraddict]

Unfortunately, sensitive topics like suicide can quite easily scare people away. There is a definite stigma that surrounds the idea of suicide, and in it's almost always a taboo regardless of cultural environment. Over time, I've just reduced the number of genuine interactions I have with other people (outside of work, for example), which has worked relatively well into keeping people at least somewhat in my circle. If it sounds a bit tiring, it is. But compartmentalization has gotten me this far :')

 

[Burden_Bailey]

I think it might be because people think being suicidal makes you homicidal. Also, since suicide is kind of violent, people think you're a violent person.

 

[catsrprettycuteman]

I don't believe anyone has to justify death, just like nobody had to justify life. We were brought into it without having to be given a justification after all. I think people don't want others to kill themselves because it hurts other people, and that suffering is temporary, but I honestly feel like this approach is wrong and that we should encourage those that are alive to be happy for those that have made decisions to be happier.

Do you wanna share your story? I'd totally be down to listen.

that would be so nice if you, my life is a lot and I'm a huge mess of a person so I would genuinely enjoy someone to yap to when I feel down xd

 

[LetMeBeSad]

Yep. I'm currently in a hospital and am being brutally honest with everyone. Mu wife can't take it. My mom and I are all laughing at suicide memes on here. My wife is just staring off into the distance shaking her head once in a while.

 

[vitbar]

A family member blurted out "please don't kill yourself" when they found out I was depressed. When very young they were traumatised by the suicide of a primary care giver. They apologised after.

 

[SuicidalRabbit]

"It's too much, I tried taking care of you but it's just too much"

"i keep trying to help but it never works why am i even doing anything anymore??"

"You have been warned in [...]'s Server: Trauma dumping"

These are actual quotes said to me
And it makes me so tired. Many people just pretend to care so they can feel better about themself. But if it get's too complicated and/or depressing they'll just slither back. There's just 1 person on the internet who actually still cares about me, and I'm starting to think they to do just for "legal reasons", which I can understand.

 

[RuntimeError]

I tried talking about it with my friend and had the police called to my house. It was a little scary to me because I haven't done anything wrong and never dealt with the police before

 

[penguinl0v3s]

that would be so nice if you, my life is a lot and I'm a huge mess of a person so I would genuinely enjoy someone to yap to when I feel down xd

DMed!

 

[Eternal Eyes]

"It's too much, I tried taking care of you but it's just too much"

"i keep trying to help but it never works why am i even doing anything anymore??"

"You have been warned in [...]'s Server: Trauma dumping"

These are actual quotes said to me
And it makes me so tired. Many people just pretend to care so they can feel better about themself. But if it get's too complicated and/or depressing they'll just slither back. There's just 1 person on the internet who actually still cares about me, and I'm starting to think they to do just for "legal reasons", which I can understand.

The top one SUCKS and is frequently used by people who just don't have the mental capacity to understand mental health issues.
It's basically "Like, I'll love you, but only if you force yourself to be happy and lie to yourself". When you say it literally like that you realise how messed up it sounds.

Fortunately I've not encountered anyone like that since school, and it was when I was in school I probably encountered the most judgmental and most abrasive people when it came to mental health problems. I will admit when I was younger I was a handful, but I literally couldn't help it. Of course, now I kind of keep my deep emotions bottled up inside...which is what the people who dismiss people TELL YOU to do! Oh the irony...

But yes, I feel I have faced stigma when I have been open with my problems (one attempt plus self harm)

 

[AInilam]

I think it might be because people think being suicidal makes you homicidal. Also, since suicide is kind of violent, people think you're a violent person.

I think that could be what it is--because once they learned I was suicidal then they started treating me like a crazed criminal or wild animal. On hotlines or emergency services these two questions: ''are you planning on hurting yourself or others?'' are asked together and I find that insulting and disgusting. Being suicidal and homicidal is NOT the same thing. One wants to end their own suffering while the other wants to harm others. People who do both like shooters and bombers are a whole different can of worms/new animal in itself.

 

[pole]

not my suicidal thoughts per se…

but I've met loads of people who I had gotten close to, and as they got closer and closer to me, they distanced themselves after seeing my brokenness.

I've scared people off after they've seen just how broken I am. I don't blame them honestly. who would want to stick around?

it's very lonely. dealing with our baggage, whether it's depression or suicidal ideation. most people just cannot handle the weight of these issues.

better to keep distance and hold friendships from afar.

 

[Burden_Bailey]

I think that could be what it is--because once they learned I was suicidal then they started treating me like a crazed criminal or wild animal. On hotlines or emergency services these two questions: ''are you planning on hurting yourself or others?'' are asked together and I find that insulting and disgusting. Being suicidal and homicidal is NOT the same thing. One wants to end their own suffering while the other wants to harm others. People who do both like shooters and bombers are a whole different can of worms/new animal in itself.

Couldn't have said it better.

 

[SMmetalhead36]

I've literally scared the hell out of people with my thoughts, but the ones I let read my writing that really sealed the deal.

 

[Orange Cat]

Most people irl don't know that I am suicidal because I don't talk about it. The few people that do know just feel sorry for me.

 

[Heartaches]

I think most people get scared or uneasy because they don't know what to do. They don't understand how someone could have those thoughts to begin with due to stigma. Plus, the idea of someone you know taking their own life evokes a very strong emotional reaction.

I struggled a lot in my adolescence to openly express these feelings to my family and friends because they couldn't understand them and tried to shut them down asap. People think you simply need to "cheer up" and those thoughts will go, they don't wanna deal with the messy, dark stuff for many reasons, not always out of malice or apathy (though, sometimes people are just dicks for the sake of it).

Nowadays I rarely open up about these thoughts, only with my therapist, my best friend and a couple of trusted ones if I feel like telling them. I don't wanna overstep boundaries or put others in very difficult situations where I know I can't be helped easily, but I would be lying if I didn't say I feel like I'm supressing a part of myself and lying to others. Hiding these emotions is like venom consuming me from the inside. I feel like I can't heal if I can't open up, but opening up is hard.​

 

[sserafim]

Yeah my mom thinks that I need "mental help" and "mental health support"

 

[druggedonsurvival]

Nowadays I rarely open up about these thoughts, only with my therapist, my best friend and a couple of trusted ones if I feel like telling them. I don't wanna overstep boundaries or put others in very difficult situations where I know I can't be helped easily, but I would be lying if I didn't say I feel like I'm supressing a part of myself and lying to others. Hiding these emotions is like venom consuming me from the inside. I feel like I can't heal if I can't open up, but opening up is hard.​

I feel the exact same way. I want to be able to talk about how I feel with others but I know I would just be upsetting them or putting them into an uncomfortable position or otherwise making them feel bad, which I don't want to do at all. But it sucks so much to have to suppress it all the time because it makes me feel so alone, so distant from everyone across the empty facade of normalcy.

 

[Shrike]

People are very uncomfortable with death across the board. This is actually not the only subject.

 

[sserafim]

Once I told my acquaintance/friend that I would rather kms than have to work for a living and he said "don't die, that's horrible"

 

[Valky]

Well, sadly this is just how society works, which is also why euthanasia is so looked down upon. It's hammered into peoples minds but also our body that you should want to live, which is exactly why the survival instinct exists. It is proven that many of our instincts are complete bs and only really a disadvantage in today's society.
"Boooo, scary/crazy thoughts, unacceptable" which is exactly why it is so important to talk about it. We will never be able to change such issues if we are not willing to remove the stigma about it.