I've been on a lot of drugs in my life, started being prescribed when I was 5. But during my last psych stay last year, they put me on Lexapro (escitalopram) and honestly it's like a fucking miracle drug for my brain. It's really hard to describe. But I would say that existing is moderately to significantly less excruciating to bear while I'm on it. And my body honestly because I can actually achieve a surface level of relaxation, something I've never felt before. Like I still want to die, but I'm in far less hysteria and pain
I've been out of it for two weeks now and the difference without it is fucking miserable.
Trying to get a new psychiatrist right now is ass tho. So idk how long I'm going to be without it. Fucking sucks. Only took 27 years to find one that works, and now I can't get it lol. If I had money, I could just buy it direct like the rich people do.
At this point I'd blow the pharmacy tech for those pills (fuck I'm such a faggot) for the relief they provide me from my own brain.