Has anyone been victim of shadowban on dating sites and fixed it successfully ?

[Marine]

I've remade my account countless times with everything brand new (email, phone number, IP address, Google ID, photos, even a new phone or on browser) nothing works... I know for sure it's a shadowban before you start insulting me. Stems from remaking my account with the same number too frequently because my appearance changed a lot before I knew that was an issue.

I'm desperate as the sites I'm shadobanned on (Tinder, OkCupid, Bumble, everything owned by the Match group basically) have the biggest and best pool of users and is my current best shot at meeting a compatible romantic partner.

I have no intention on relying only on dating sites and I'm still trying to figure out the seemingly vibrational issue (or whatever it is) but it just happens to be my best chance right now and I can't afford any more odds against me...

Anyway if anyone can help, I'll be grateful.

 

[Bootleg Astolfo]

Screw dating sites, wear slutty excentric clothes and go jojo pose at people in public.

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

I've remade my account countless times with everything brand new (email, phone number, IP address, Google ID, photos, even a new phone or on browser) nothing works... I know for sure it's a shadowban before you start insulting me. Stems from remaking my account with the same number too frequently because my appearance changed a lot before I knew that was an issue.

How would they even know it's you if you changed email, number, IP, ID and phone? Not sure how it's insulting, but it seems unlikely to be a shadow ban (goin by this small amount of info), also not sure shadow bans are real, but think they do make you pop up less if women don't seem interested (algorithms, not manually, ofc). Could just be that men outnumber women nine to one on Tinder in combination with endless hypergamy and a culture of serial monogamy and casual sex.

 

[Smart No More]

But if you're using all new credentials how would they know who you are to impose a shadow ban?

There are ways/resources to check whether your accounts are shadow banned. A quick search engine search will provide sources for them.

EDIT @GenesAndEnvironment pipped me to the post lol.

 

[Manaaja]

I cannot understand how they could know it's you if you are using a completely new IP address, phone number, email etc.

In your case, I'd either ask on a subreddit/forum which knows about these things, or contact the dating companies themselves and explain the situation. They earn nothing by having you shadowbanned. Lie them that you'd very gladly pay them for a premium account or something when you get unbanned.

There might Franch-only dating sites too. Even my country which has like five people has a lot of dating sites that only operate in here, so I'd expect there would lots of French dating sites.

 

[Cathy Ames]

How would they even know it's you if you changed email, number, IP, ID and phone? Not sure how it's insulting, but it seems unlikely to be a shadow ban (goin by this small amount of info), also not sure shadow bans are real, but think they do make you pop up less if women don't seem interested (algorithms, not manually, ofc). Could just be that men outnumber women nine to one on Tinder in combination with endless hypergamy and a culture of serial monogamy and casual sex.

I believe the OP is female. Wouldn't the nine-to-one ratio work in her favor vs. seeming like a shadow ban?

 

[Smart No More]

Shadow bans exist from what I read. Service providers have opened up a little on the tactic though I don't know how rife it is. The thing is, how would you get shadow banned on so many platforms and be recognisable from entirely different credentials.

I am pretty certain they have to be honest if you outright ask them. Maybe you can research that to fact check it. I would say cal them out (politely) via one of their 'contact us' links and ask if they are doing it. They're probably able to be evasive but I don't think they can outright lie to you and "no, we are not imposing a shadow ban on you". So yeah, ask.

 

[Marine]

Shadowbanning works in favor of dating sites, that's why they do it. Remaking accounts gives users a noob boost every time hence keeping them using the site for free instead of subscribing to paid options. I've asked on subreddit before and I'm not alone in this case. I know for a fact this is a case of shadowbanning, it may be due to my one time face verification for a previous profile which may have gotten me permanently screwed, or the phone number I bought may have been used by a previously shadowbanned person, it's possible. Dating sites have become very unscrupulous. They never answer such inquiries. Anyway I can clearly not use those sites normally anymore. If you have any real advice... I am a girl, indeed, and I know this is also happening to other (fairly attractive) girls.

 

[Smart No More]

I believe the OP is female. Wouldn't the nine-to-one ratio work in her favor vs. seeming like a shadow ban?

OP described a significant change in appearance so I wonder if maybe there's a gendre fluidity element to this. Perhaps a transition.

 

[Marine]

OP described a significant change in appearance so I wonder if maybe there's a gendre fluidity element to this. Perhaps a transition.

No, I'm a cis female. I've just improved my appearance.

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

Shadowbanning works in favor of dating sites, that's why they do it. Remaking accounts gives users a noob boost every time hence keeping them using the site for free instead of subscribing to paid options. I've asked on subreddit before and I'm not alone in this case. I know for a fact this is a case of shadowbanning, it may be due to my one time face verification for a previous profile which may have gotten me permanently screwed, or the phone number I bought may have been used by a previously shadowbanned person, it's possible. Dating sites have become very unscrupulous. They never answer such inquiries. Anyway I can clearly not use those sites normally anymore. If you have any real advice... I am a girl, indeed, and I know this is also happening to other (fairly attractive) girls.

Oh, they have your face, right. The advice is to meet guys in any other way than those apps, then (IRL, hobby groups, social media, etc). Don't think much advice is really necessary, guess take your time and choose the one you like the most?

 

[Marine]

Oh, they have your face, right. The advice is to meet guys in any other way than those apps, then (IRL, hobby groups, social media, etc). Don't think much advice is really necessary, guess take your time and choose the one you like the most?

I'm asking because the plandemic has pretty much taken every other possibility from me... It was already difficult to meet people before even while being very socially active...

 

[Smart No More]

Shadowbanning works in favor of dating sites, that's why they do it. Remaking accounts gives users a noob boost every time hence keeping them using the site for free instead of subscribing to paid options.

I don't doubt they unscrupulous. They always have been. Most companies are. I don't get how that works in their favour. Don't they want you to use subscription services rather than the free features? What am I missing?

 

[Marine]

Screw dating sites, wear slutty excentric clothes and go jojo pose at people in public.

I wish I was sexy enough for that, not yet though lol. I'm gonna picture myself jojo posing now because of you

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

I'm asking because the plandemic has pretty much taken every other possibility from me... It was already difficult to meet people before even while being very socially active...

You can't just go to the store or gym or whatever and hit guys up there? Bars? Have your number ready to hand out or something?

 

[Marine]

I don't doubt they unscrupulous. They always have been. Most companies are. I don't get how that works in their favour. Don't they want you to use subscription services rather than the free features? What am I missing?

Yes they do. That's why they're not happy with users getting free boosts from constantly resetting and never using their paid features. Many thirsty guys have abused this system to the max by making a new account like every week unfortunately. People pay when they have a miserable experience and become desperate, hoping that paying will give them more success (which it doesn't really apparently).

 

[Bootleg Astolfo]

I wish I was sexy enough for that, not yet though lol. I'm gonna picture myself jojo posing now because of you

 

[Marine]

You can't just go to the store or gym or whatever and hit guys up there? Bars? Have your number ready to hand out or something?

I don't have the confidence to hit up guys randomly without a context / pretext. I can occasionally speak to people at bars for instances and even that is difficult and has never led to anything really. Dating sites let you know whether the other person is single, what they're looking for, if they're attracted to you and what they like, what their values are etc. Again I haven't said that dating sites were a replacement for offline stuff, I just can't afford to lose more chances if I can avoid it, especially because I know how difficult it is to meet people in general. Most places I used to frequent have stabbed me, and humanity as a whole, in the back during the crisis and I'm not ready to forgive that, so I have very few places to go to now. I'm kind of lost after having lost all my activities and hobbies and realizing I can't go back to such rotten places anymore... I need to meet real, decent human beings. They wouldn't be compatible otherwise. Anyway, that wasn't the point.

 

[Smart No More]

Yes they do. That's why they're not happy with users getting free boosts from constantly resetting and never using their paid features. Many thirsty guys have abused this system to the max by making a new account like every week unfortunately. People pay when they have a miserable experience and become desperate, hoping that paying will give them more success (which it doesn't really apparently).

Okay, now I understand. I read it like you meant it the other way around initially. Lost in translation situation. Seems morw likely all free users are experiencing sometbing akin to shadow banning in order to get people onto the subscription ladder. I guess that would would be more of an algorithm thing though. Are you able to have your submitted ID photo resended? Pain in the ass but you can go the route of having all your detaila rwmoved right? Rather than the soft account delete most people think is final but isn't. Not aure how possible it is these days. The tactics have no doubt evolved since I was anywhere near a dating site. Glad I ducked out early from socials of any kind.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

What did you do to warrant getting shadowbanned in the first place? Maybe you can try getting it appealed on any of the apps you prefer if you know the cause. You could also try Hinge which I hear has decent recents though it hasn't worked for me just like every other app.

I need to meet real, decent human beings. They wouldn't be compatible otherwise.

On dating apps this seems even less likely.

 

[Marine]

What did you do to warrant getting shadowbanned in the first place? Maybe you can try getting it appealed on any of the apps you prefer if you know the cause. You could also try Hinge which I hear has decent recents though it hasn't worked for me just like every other app.


On dating apps this seems even less likely.

Remade my accounts too many times without knowing like I said. I tried. It's what happens to most people. They just don't answer. I've tried Hinge, it never worked. I don't know if it's owned my the Match group but I've heard users say so and have the same issue, which may be what happened to me.

There's some decent human beings on dating apps. I'm on it. I've met a couple of great guys who just weren't physically compatible or too far away.

Okay, now I understand. I read it like you meant it the other way around initially. Lost in translation situation. Seems morw likely all free users are experiencing sometbing akin to shadow banning in order to get people onto the subscription ladder. I guess that would would be more of an algorithm thing though. Are you able to have your submitted ID photo resended? Pain in the ass but you can go the route of having all your detaila rwmoved right? Rather than the soft account delete most people think is final but isn't. Not aure how possible it is these days. The tactics have no doubt evolved since I was anywhere near a dating site. Glad I ducked out early from socials of any kind.

Not all free users, only if you remake an account too many times, or do something they don't like such as swiping on everyone etc. They also changed their algorithm for the worse but it doesn't lead to the app being completely broken like it is for me. The thing is these people pretty much never answer, it's mostly automated too. They never completely remove your data when you've been shadownbanned, hence the whole hard reset thing. I guess they must have implemented even worse control for that now or I just got unlucky... I wish I could meet people organically outside... Haven't had any chance with that so far.

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

Nope. And those apps sucks.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Remade my accounts too many times without knowing like I said. I tried. It's what happens to most people. They just don't answer. I've tried Hinge, it never worked. I don't know if it's owned my the Match group but I've heard users say so and have the same issue, which may be what happened to me.

There's some decent human beings on dating apps. I'm on it. I've met a couple of great guys who just weren't physically compatible or too far away.

Ah, sorry about that then. You could still try contacting support to see if you can get this removed somehow? Dunno if that's worth it though.

 

[Fakereality]

No experience in dating online but from what I have heard tinder, cupid have all gone to shit thanks to match group also they are mostly useful for hookups and one night stand rather than a deep romantic experience.

 

[Marine]

No experience in dating online but from what I have heard tinder, cupid have all gone to shit thanks to match group also they are mostly useful for hookups and one night stand rather than a deep romantic experience.

They certainly have gone to shit in terms of algorithm + the shadowbanning phenomenon.

Now I still know many people looking for love there, there even is a specific section for it, but they basically seem to make it near impossible to meet anyone who's a true match, unless you figure out what I haven't maybe. There are some Tinder wizards out there, but those I've asked couldn't help me...

I wish I could meet people outside again, but since the plandemic it's exceedingly hard to meet people because I've lost everything with no way back, the only places where there are people are bars but I can't seem to find a pretext to talk to random strangers most of the time and my self esteem / confidence has disappeared with my bulimia related weight gain and a long series of horrendous experiences with relationships... No one ever comes to talk to me either in those situations, it makes me feel like Quasimodo...

My degraded health keeps me in way too often so the only option I really have most of the time IS dating sites.

 

[Fakereality]

They certainly have gone to shit in terms of algorithm + the shadowbanning phenomenon.

Now I still know many people looking for love there, there even is a specific section for it, but they basically seem to make it near impossible to meet anyone who's a true match, unless you figure out what I haven't maybe. There are some Tinder wizards out there, but those I've asked couldn't help me...

I wish I could meet people outside again, but since the plandemic it's exceedingly hard to meet people because I've lost everything with no way back, the only places where there are people are bars but I can't seem to find a pretext to talk to random strangers most of the time and my self esteem / confidence has disappeared with my bulimia related weight gain and a long series of horrendous experiences with relationships... No one ever comes to talk to me either in those situations, it makes me feel like Quasimodo...

My degraded health keeps me in way too often so the only option I really have most of the time IS dating sites.

Those apps are like slot machines you gotta throw some money at it maybe like a pro version or whatever shadow banning maybe is their way of getting the user to buy those.

 

[Marine]

Those apps are like slot machines you gotta throw some money at it maybe like a pro version or whatever shadow banning maybe is their way of getting the user to buy those.

According to what I've heard from Tinder wizards it's mostly a scam though. You're better off figuring out the algorithm and using it to your advantage or just trying something else... But they do try forcing you to pay, for sure.

 

[virgilwalks]

The pandemic has made dating a lot more challenging. What about online "meet ups" that are not dating sites.

 

[Marine]

The pandemic has made dating a lot more challenging. What about online "meet ups" that are not dating sites.

Things were less fucked up than they are now at the heart of the plandemic. I was actually able to use these sites more normally back then. The meet up sites here are all dead.