Happy to be dying?

[mold]

2025 has been hell for me, and if 2025 was hell, 2026 is super hell, lmao. For the past 2 months, I've not felt genuine joy, just mild happiness(? not sure what to call this feeling. Maybe there are better words for it.) and my depression, anxiety, BPD, and worst of all PTSD has gotten to a point where I cannot function. To top it all off, my old drinking habits came back, and I tripped, hitting my head, which then led to a concussion (great!).

However, just a few moments ago I found DSL's website (it took me 3 weeks, I guess I'm either really stupid, or being bilingual with a concussion doesn't really help haha) and I felt so much... joy? Relief? Happiness? I can't explain it. I actually smiled seeing that dumb website that sent me on a wild goose chase for 3 weeks. The fact that death can actually happen and I'll be free makes me happy. It's sad to say/write such a thing aloud. But I'm happy to know death isn't as far or as painful as I thought. Does any one else who decided it's finally time to go feel this way?

(P.S. I know the rules of the forum, I will not be providing access to the website or any hints, sorry... I trust that you are all smarter and healthier in the head than me and won't take 3 weeks to search )

 

[Defenestration]

Yes, I've already felt that relief when death drew near... but the survival instinct is hard to overcome at the last moment.

 

[squiddedoutt]

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[Defenestration]

Sometimes when I delve into the concrete formalities of my CTB, it calms me down...

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

yes I will be happy to be dying

I mean I will be happy to know my death is near

because at the point of my Death all my problems will be solved instantly and forever

i don't want to go through any long lasting excruciating pain either while being alive or while "dying ". ur still alive while dying which is why pain is possible.

1 micro second after my brain dies I will never exist again. I can't suffer unbearable pain or extreme suffering if I don't exist

that's one reason why Non-existence forever is the ultimate bliss the ultimate perfection

 

[Defenestration]

Oui, je serai heureux de mourir.

Je veux dire, je serai heureux de savoir que ma mort est proche.

Car au moment de ma mort, tous mes problèmes seront résolus instantanément et pour toujours.

Je ne veux pas endurer de douleurs atroces et prolongées, ni de mon vivant, ni en mourant. On est encore vivant en mourant, c'est pourquoi la douleur est possible.

Une microseconde après la mort de mon cerveau, je n'existerai plus jamais. Je ne peux pas souffrir de douleurs insupportables ni de souffrances extrêmes si je n'existe pas.

Death is eternal rest