What is Happiness ?

[Manfrotto99]

It's been such a long time since I knew what happiness or joy was or felt like. I don't even know if I have ever known it - yet I see others around me experience it often and take it for granted...going on holidays, getting married, going on a date, having children, buying a new car, new home...even simple things like playing and walking their dog. It's all completely foreign to me....and even if I tried I would not have the opportunity and couldn't afford such things anyway.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I also feel like moments of happiness have been fleeting. I tend to think we need to be relaxed and free of worry enough to experience happiness for a reasonable length of time. The problem I tend/ tended to have was- any moment I was happy about something was quickly followed by worrying about something else.

There was even the worry that finding myself in a high mood (which was rare) would likely not last and- wouldn't that just make the inevitable fall back down all the worse?

I think happiness tends to link with feeling hopeful- which doesn't seem common in suicidal people.

It coincided with a natural gratitude when I used to experience it too. One would kind of feed the other. Probably, my happiest moments were around other people. Which is ironic- seeing as I prefer to isolate now. But, I do remember feeling so grateful to have certain people in my life. Of course, the pain of losing them eventually put me off seeking out more moments like that.

 

[Lost_Dawns]

a lie

 

[RadiantNumber]

Happiness does not exists