Happy Birthday

[lilb0wpeep]

Happy birthday to the girl who taught me what love was, even if our relationship only ended up hurting in the end. I know you don't want to see or hear from me, and that you maybe are afraid or hate me. But that could never stop me from wanting the best for you. I'm sorry for falling apart in your arms and having it break you down aswell. I'm sorry I wasn't able to pick you up and help piece you back together. I hope that you've been able to overcome the feelings and pain from that point. I hope that you're not just surviving but that you're living a life that you enjoy. I hope that you're surrounded by nature and people that support and uplift you. I hope that you feel comfortable and confident in yourself. I hope that today you have a precious 22nd birthday, and that you're alive living a life you want to.
While I know that you don't want to be found, I still can't stop myself from searching for any sign of you. Around every corner, any car that passes by, every notification that rings, every person I see, every knock I hear, every recommended post and account. Any sign that you're alive, that you're here, that you're well. I know you don't want to connect but deep down thats what I yearn for. It's ok and I understand either way. I just want you to know that even if some of our relationship still hurts me, I feel no resentment, blame, anger, or ill will towards you. Do not feel bad about what happened in our time. I only want you to feel free, and to learn what's better from what was.
I'll always wish you the best.
You used to call me sunny/suni(Sun), meanwhile you were always my moon. The light shining through all the darkness. Even if it's not the life we dreamed of living together, I hope you're still able to live in a beautiful home sustaining your life and happiness. Again, I may be dreaming of a world where we start up our lives creating together. Understanding that it is only a dream, I still wish that we can live that way together or apart regardless.
I'll always love you deep with in my soul. May the best in life find its way to you and you to it.
Happy Birthday SRB

 

[lilb0wpeep]

why is it that I can't bring myself to stop wishing for the comfort of you. It's not even like I 'never got over you' after we broke up, but for whatever reason when the people between us told me about you years after we last spoke I haven't been able to not think and hope that maybe you would come back into my life. It's just that everyday and or night I find myself missing the warmth of lying next to you. Missing the nights and days when we would fool around, and considering our surroundings, more than we should have. I secretly hope that one day you will appear in my life and we live out our fantasy lives together. That one day while we have the house to ourselves we can remake better memories together. I wish to held by your comfort and show more love than I had before. This feels wrong to write out onto the internet and here of all places but still I write in hopes that if you ever arrive here you might see this and know that you are cared about and wanted.