druggedonsurvival

druggedonsurvival

Student
Feb 8, 2024
193
This only happened a few hours ago. I think I have to get it off my chest right now.

I was drinking before class, enough to get me intoxicated, but not to drunk to stand up or speak. I only stayed in class for about fifteen minutes before asking to be excused. I didn't come back - I realized I shouldn't be there. I started driving home but I couldn't quite go home since I wouldn't be expected that early. I decided to stop in a secluded parking lot. In my stupor, I decided to fuck around with the seat belt in the back seat (comes out from the car ceiling) and make a noose (slip knot) out of it. I tried a couple of times but after a while I had made a pretty good one. I decided to put it around my neck to see if I could get myself to pass out. Well, it didn't work but I managed to get my face a slight shade of purple.

After a while I remembered that I'm not yet ready to die, so I tried to undo the noose but at this point it was extremely tight around my neck. I started panicking and squirming, now desperately trying to get myself out. As I panicked I got closer to where the seat belt comes out, and as I got closer I found that the seat belt did not want to budge as it got further in. In other words, my head was getting closer to the car ceiling to where I had less and less room to move around. I realized that I should stop moving if I want to live, and tried to calm down, but I was desperate enough to open the car door and cry for help. I screamed at the top of my lungs for help probably a dozen times but either no one heard or no one took my screams seriously.

After about 30 agonizing minutes I finally managed to get the noose undone. It was a relief but I felt like shit. I started to drive home again but I still would have arrived too early so I pulled over in another parking lot, this time with cars. Soon enough I broke down crying... Now I'm not really sure what to think but there's burns on my neck and I hope people believe me when I tell them that it was an allergic reaction or something. Now I also know what choking yourself does. My throat is still sore and I have a little cough. Anyway, that's my horrible story, hope you enjoyed it.
 
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dumbfukloser

dumbfukloser

Member
Feb 3, 2024
19
I'm sorry that happened to you. The after effects of attempting is mentally agonizing. It's almost like your brain doesn't wanna register what happened but you know all too well what was going through your mind. Try and get some rest.
 
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UKscotty

Doesn't read PMs
May 20, 2021
2,450
I'm sorry this happened to you.

Another powerful reminder to all these people who seem to think suicide practice is a good idea.

It takes only 15 seconds to turn a practice into a fatal misadventure. Once the blood flow is stopped, you're finished a couple of minutes later.
 
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R

rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
3,793
Am sorry you are feeling this way, the aftermath of attempts can be mentally draining. Take it easy on yourself, take a good rest, maybe treat yourself. I hope you feel better soon and wishing you all the best ❤️
 
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Raven2

Raven2

Specialist
Dec 1, 2022
359
Sounds awful, sorry it happened. Hope you will take it easy.
 
druggedonsurvival

druggedonsurvival

Student
Feb 8, 2024
193
Doubt you would have died
Yeah, you might be right. Which is why I'm kind of glad no one came to help. I think it's better that I got myself out of the situation without anyone finding out what was going on. Either way, I wish it didn't happen.
 

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