Got my SN. CTB on Thursday

[TVtrays]

I just got my SN in the mail and I took my first dose of meto just now
I'm going to be taking 10mg of meto twice a day until Thursday, when I'll take 30mg of meto an hour prior to ingesting my SN
My birthday is on Friday, too. Birthdays are too painful for me, so I'd much prefer to die before that. I'd honestly just like to do it tonight but apparently it's necessary to do two days of anti-emetics prior to actually ingesting SN
I'm scared but eager at the same time. It's a strange position to be in, but I can't be the only one that feels this way in the days leading up to their CTB, right?
I want nothing more than to pass on in the company of my loved ones but I know I can't have that and it hurts. I have much to think about in these next two days, but I know ill be at peace in the end.

 

[Hoopali]

My understanding was that the two day regimen was to ensure no adverse reaction to the meto in the buildup rather than a necessity (according to Stan maybe but my memory isn't the best). I thought I read that meto only has a five or six hour half life anyhow. I could be wrong or maybe they changed the advice, or both!

Either way, I hope all goes well whatever happens and I wish you peace whether you go through with it or not. Make sure you back away if at any point you don't feel sure it's what you want to do. Take care.

 

[schopenh]

According to Stan's guide the stat dose only and 3 day regimen were equally as successful. It makes sense since meto has an elimination half life of 5.5 hours. Peaceful pill only recommends stat and dignitas only do a stat with N.
That said, whenever the time comes there's no shame in not going through with it. Good luck with whatever happens.

 

[one4all]

There also is a resource page abut trying to test the SN, to make sure it is up to par. If you feel like going that route. Either way i hope you find peace.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/blood-test-with-sn-blood-pics-inside.31365/

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I'm sorry you are choosing to leave @TVtrays - I hope your suffering ends. It must be such an odd feeling. Stick around and chat if you want.

 

[JSauter]

What are your thoughts on the dying process with SN? Are you fearful of the process?

 

[whereispeace]

Good luck. I have some SN on hand as well, but no anti-emetics. I don't really know what to do.

 

[x-Ace-x]

Good luck. I have some SN on hand as well, but no anti-emetics. I don't really know what to do.

I'm gonna just take pain killers and fast prior drinking SN (extra servings in case I vomit). I think it depends on how well you can handle the taste and overall knowing your stomach. I, for example, haven't vomited for more than 10+ years and even if I eat a lot or mix something bad, never vomit, so I'm not that worried.

No guarantees but I believe there's no need to use antiemetic, antacid and other meds for me. Depends on you, of course.

 

[whereispeace]

I'm gonna just take pain killers and fast prior drinking SN (extra servings in case I vomit). I think it depends on how well you can handle the taste and overall knowing your stomach. I, for example, haven't vomited for more than 10+ years and even if I eat a lot or mix something bad, never vomit, so I'm not that worried.

No guarantees but I believe there's no need to use antiemetic, antacid and other meds for me. Depends on you, of course.

That's kind of comforting, I guess. As of now, my plan is take the SN alone...I'm definitely a little scared.

 

[Hoopali]

Good luck. I have some SN on hand as well, but no anti-emetics. I don't really know what to do.

Are they not on the popular auction site anymore?

The stats based on the success/failures thread suggest that nausea and vomiting have a high chance of occurring even with the anti-e's. However they also show that people have ctb even after throwing up.

However, I would prefer my last moments not to be dry retching over a bowl if at all possible.

 

[LMLN]

I'm so sorry it's come to this for you. We are here whatever you decide. We are happy to have you here if you change your mind!

 

[one4all]

That's kind of comforting, I guess. As of now, my plan is take the SN alone...I'm definitely a little scared.

You are not alone in that feeling.

 

[whereispeace]

Are they not on the popular auction site anymore?

The stats based on the success/failures thread suggest that nausea and vomiting have a high chance of occurring even with the anti-e's. However they also show that people have ctb even after throwing up.

However, I would prefer my last moments not to be dry retching over a bowl if at all possible.

There are some obstacles to me acquiring the anti-emetics (that I'd rather not go into detail about), but it's possible I could get them. It's just another hurdle to clear.

 

[HorribleFeelings1]

I just got my SN in the mail and I took my first dose of meto just now
I'm going to be taking 10mg of meto twice a day until Thursday, when I'll take 30mg of meto an hour prior to ingesting my SN
My birthday is on Friday, too. Birthdays are too painful for me, so I'd much prefer to die before that. I'd honestly just like to do it tonight but apparently it's necessary to do two days of anti-emetics prior to actually ingesting SN
I'm scared but eager at the same time. It's a strange position to be in, but I can't be the only one that feels this way in the days leading up to their CTB, right?
I want nothing more than to pass on in the company of my loved ones but I know I can't have that and it hurts. I have much to think about in these next two days, but I know ill be at peace in the end.

Don't worry you're not alone who feels like that, I'm scared but also eager to do it a lot. The only thing holding me back is hurting my loved ones, I wish my family and friends knew and wish they didn't care but sadly that reality will never happen in a million of years. I would LOVE to talk to you though to keep company and be there. So if you want to them hit me up! (:

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

I just got my SN in the mail and I took my first dose of meto just now
I'm going to be taking 10mg of meto twice a day until Thursday, when I'll take 30mg of meto an hour prior to ingesting my SN
My birthday is on Friday, too. Birthdays are too painful for me, so I'd much prefer to die before that. I'd honestly just like to do it tonight but apparently it's necessary to do two days of anti-emetics prior to actually ingesting SN
I'm scared but eager at the same time. It's a strange position to be in, but I can't be the only one that feels this way in the days leading up to their CTB, right?
I want nothing more than to pass on in the company of my loved ones but I know I can't have that and it hurts. I have much to think about in these next two days, but I know ill be at peace in the end.

I wish you peace and a painless transition. I would also like to pass in the company of friends and family but they would never understand or support my decision either.

 

[akrasia]

i wish you peace. if you ever change your mind we are always here for you.

 

[TVtrays]

Hey everyone, I just wanted to give an update.
I've decided to go through with it tonight.
My apologies for not having responded to any of you. I've never been one to be active online so it's certainly difficult.
I just smoked a swisher to relax, which I think was a mistake bc I've been under self isolation for suspected coronavirus. I just want to enjoy some sort of comfort before I go...
I just took my 30mg of meto and I will be ingesting the SN in about 30 minutes, at 11:30pm Pacific time.
Thank you all for your kind words. Its comforting to know I'm not completely alone in this.
I'm not gonna lie, I'm scared. I'm scared of lying there, awake, knowing that when I drift off, that's it, and realizing that. I don't want to die in fear but I know it's now or never...

 

[InTheAirTonight]

Hey everyone, I just wanted to give an update.
I've decided to go through with it tonight.
My apologies for not having responded to any of you. I've never been one to be active online so it's certainly difficult.
I just smoked a swisher to relax, which I think was a mistake bc I've been under self isolation for suspected coronavirus. I just want to enjoy some sort of comfort before I go...
I just took my 30mg of meto and I will be ingesting the SN in about 30 minutes, at 11:30pm Pacific time.
Thank you all for your kind words. Its comforting to know I'm not completely alone in this.
I'm not gonna lie, I'm scared. I'm scared of lying there, awake, knowing that when I drift off, that's it, and realizing that. I don't want to die in fear but I know it's now or never...

I understand your decision. Sometimes you can't wait any longer. I wish that your passing is swift and peaceful. All the best.

 

[LMLN]

I am sorry you have come to this decision. Know we care. You do not have to do this tonight. Make sure your fear is not doubt about doing this.
Peace and love to you.

 

[ThroughDarknessLight]

God bless!

 

[InTheAirTonight]

@TVtrays how are you feeling? We are still here with you

 

[TVtrays]

@TVtrays how are you feeling? We are still here with you

My roommate caught me. I thought he had slgone to sleep 2 hours ago. Fuck.

 

[InTheAirTonight]

My roommate caught me. I thought he had slgone to sleep 2 hours ago. Fuck.

Sorry to hear that. Hope he doesn't know what you were doing

 

[TVtrays]

Sorry to hear that. Hope he doesn't know what you were doing

he knows... fuck

 

[muffin222]

I'm sorry to hear life has brought you to this point.
I wish you a peaceful and easy transition when/if the time comes

 

[InTheAirTonight]

he knows... fuck

What is he going to do?

 

[TVtrays]

What is he going to do?

He just tossed out my SN
Luckily no hospital but still
Fuck

 

[InTheAirTonight]

He just tossed out my SN
Luckily no hospital but still
Fuck

I wonder how he knew it was toxic? He shouldn't be throwing out thing that belong to you. Anyway, it's good that you're safe.

 

[TVtrays]

I wonder how he knew it was toxic? He shouldn't be throwing out thing that belong to you. Anyway, it's good that you're safe.

He saw me mixing it in a cup of water. He saw the fire diamond thing on the container and he put two and two together

 

[Shu]

According to Stan's guide the stat dose only and 3 day regimen were equally as successful. It makes sense since meto has an elimination half life of 5.5 hours. Peaceful pill only recommends stat and dignitas only do a stat with N.
That said, whenever the time comes there's no shame in not going through with it. Good luck with whatever happens.

So if the elimination half life is 5.5 hours I wonder if there is even a point in doing the 2 day