I am ctbing tomorrow using SN.
I had my dinner at 9 pm today. I ll wake and not eat or drink anything. Some sips of water maybe.
So i assume I ll have fasted for quite a long time .
12 pm: 1000 paracetamol
12.20 pm: 3x 10 mg metaclopramide
Meanwhile prepare 3 glasses each having 25 GM's SN using minimum water not more than 100 ml for one glass
12.55 use mouth numbing gel.
1.00 pm drink sn with benzos.
Am i missing anything??
Not having antacid or beta blockers.
Open to any suggestions. Will be active after few more hours sleeping now .
Well love you all so much, i wish i could hug you guys. I am sort of an unstable person and quite emotional. I am overwhelmed right now ,not sad but a strange feeling I can't describe. I feel a sense of belonging, attachment and carmaderie with you guys. I never cried ever in my life for parting with people, even best friends or death of family members but now I am.
It's as if we are bonded by our miseries and misfortune and death . I guess that's what makes this bond so different and maybe we can only feel it. Maybe we were born of the same cosmic womb of pain , all suffering in variety of ways and we all have one common goal.
I wish i could write more but have some errands to run.
BTW a funny incident, i had induction today at the new company i joined at. The HRs said I was the most active and involved member cause i like talking a lot, i am a chatterbox, have always been. I was asking questions, laughing at their jokes, answering their questions.
I think that was the bipolar tinge of mine, or maybe ADHD impulsivity or whatever,doesn't matter in the END nothing does.
I feel bad but they will be shocked to know I am ctbing the very next day. The HR guys think of themselves as a good judge of a person and his character etc. They will be thinking a lot cause I was in no way appearing suicidal. God bless them.
