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I

I want to end it

Arcanist
Apr 29, 2018
475
It feels a bit surreal that it has come to this, but I am finally going to be ctbing.:aw: I have been on here since 2018. The site was different back then. It was newly formed, I joined only 1 month after it started. I prepared my method and I was ready to do it in September and again in October but I didn't. Life was looking better in 2019. However since the beginning of 2020, it's been getting progressively worse for me and now circumstances have forced me to do it. If I don't do it this month, I will be in very deep problems.

My method is N and I will be going tomorrow. It still doesn't feel normal that I will be ending my life but like I say, circumstances have forced me to.

Thank you for reading. I will update when I do it. I will also say what N smells and tastes like. But I can't say more than that after I take it, because I must switch off my computer before the N takes effect.
 
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jodes2

jodes2

Hello people ❤️
Aug 28, 2022
7,736
Really sorry you're going. Mind if I ask what problems you see coming?
 
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Lily (Osako)

Lily (Osako)

Everything all at once
Jul 30, 2022
381
Sending you love. I'm so very sorry you've been pushed into this decision. 💕
 
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C

carnivore

I'm a coward
Aug 30, 2022
90
That's sąd,very sad.
 
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hamvil

hamvil

Wizard
Aug 29, 2022
650
Safe trip.
 
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TimetoGo!

TimetoGo!

Wizard
Aug 30, 2022
650
It feels a bit surreal that it has come to this, but I am finally going to be ctbing.:aw: I have been on here since 2018. The site was different back then. It was newly formed, I joined only 1 month after it started. I prepared my method and I was ready to do it in September and again in October but I didn't. Life was looking better in 2019. However since the beginning of 2020, it's been getting progressively worse for me and now circumstances have forced me to do it. If I don't do it this month, I will be in very deep problems.

My method is N and I will be going tomorrow. It still doesn't feel normal that I will be ending my life but like I say, circumstances have forced me to.

Thank you for reading. I will update when I do it. I will also say what N smells and tastes like. But I can't say more than that after I take it, because I must switch off my computer before the N takes effect.
all the best bro
 
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I

I want to end it

Arcanist
Apr 29, 2018
475
Really sorry you're going. Mind if I ask what problems you see coming?
Financial problems mainly which are forcing me to do it now. I will be kicked out from where I live next month. I had other problems too. Mental issues, mental illness, complete inability to relate to anyone in real life or make friends or find a girlfriend my whole life. Big decisions I messed up. It's hard to say without going into detail. I will be doing it tomorrow.

I feel embarrassed and ashamed to write a ctb note with the reasons. I might leave it and not bother with one.
 
Last edited:
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dustyfurcollector

dustyfurcollector

Experienced
Dec 17, 2021
299
I'm so sorry you're life has led you to this decision, but I support your decision and wish you safe travels. 🖤💛
 
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Nirrend

Nirrend

The important is not how long you live ...
Mar 12, 2022
400
May you find peace dear @I want to end it <3
 
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jodes2

jodes2

Hello people ❤️
Aug 28, 2022
7,736
Financial problems mainly which are forcing me to do it now. I will be kicked out from where I live next month. I had other problems too. Mental issues, mental illness, complete inability to relate to anyone in real life or make friends or find a girlfriend my whole life. Big decisions I messed up. It's hard to say without going into detail. I will be doing it tomorrow.

I feel embarrassed and ashamed to write a ctb note with the reasons. I might leave it and not bother with one.
Sorry to hear that. I hope you do leave notes, or even say what needs to be said before you go. I hope you find peace soon

.
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,863
I wish you freedom from suffering, farewell.
 
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I

I want to end it

Arcanist
Apr 29, 2018
475
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jodes2

jodes2

Hello people ❤️
Aug 28, 2022
7,736
Safe travels buddy
 
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Cryptonite

Cryptonite

In the state of shock of what happened
Apr 30, 2022
722
All the best to you, respect for finally going for it
 
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I

I want to end it

Arcanist
Apr 29, 2018
475
I hope this thread can be a resource on the taste and smell of N for those wanting to do this method. I opened 1 bottle and smelled it from inside the bottle. It smells like weak vodka to me. I will give further updates on the smell and taste of it later.
 
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E

Eternal_Darkness

Member
Sep 9, 2022
7
I hope you'll find the peace you're looking for. We're with you
 
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justanotherone2022

justanotherone2022

Member
Sep 2, 2022
36
Safe travel. Find peace 🤍
 
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Euthanza

Euthanza

Self Righteous Suicide
Jun 9, 2022
1,447
Peace be upon you
 
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tiny_dancer

tiny_dancer

Student
Aug 23, 2022
136
Wishing you the peace & comfort you deserve and sending love for you on your journey
 
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hellispink

hellispink

poisonous
May 26, 2022
1,229
May you rest in peace. Wherever you go, my best wishes.
 
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whatevs

whatevs

Mining for copium in the weirdest places.
Jan 15, 2022
2,913
I wish you luck in ending your pain and going back to wherever we were before being born. Obviously this has been meditated upon for many years. Safe travels.
 
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Lawliet

Lawliet

b a n g
Sep 15, 2020
357
safe travels, may it be quick and painless
 
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Dead Meat

Dead Meat

DOOMED
Oct 10, 2018
18,394
I'm very sorry to see you go and I want to wish you a very pleasant and comfortable journey and may you have eternal peace and tranquility you very beautiful soul. :heart::hug::heart::hug::heart::hug::heart::hug::heart::hug::heart::hug::heart::hug::heart::hug::heart::hug::heart::hug::heart::hug::heart::hug:
 
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Reactions: not-2-b-the-answer, Hollowillow, OpheliasFlowers and 1 other person
E

eternapeace

Member
Sep 10, 2022
50
Congratulations. (I mean this in a genuine way, not sarcasm)
 
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Astronauta

Astronauta

Student
Aug 9, 2022
104
Sinto muito por tudo que lhe trouxe aqui.
Que o outro lado seja gentil com você.
 
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Salvation_

Salvation_

"Please, finish my story."
Nov 25, 2020
235
Good luck and safe travels~
 

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